Julie Dolsey-Weiss's Comments

Comment Wall (12 comments)

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

At 10:48am on July 4, 2011, Sue Waxman said…

Dear Julie,

I am in school for veterinary technology..Mom was so proud of me. I picked up the pieces left after my divorce and went back to school. I am so where you are...Mom died 1 week ago today. I am so empty. I have no father. He left us when I was a kid. Came home and told mother.."Dont love you and these kids..never did", She never was whole again. Damn him!!!!! She was my world, How do we find any reason to "enjoy" anything. I am still in bed. I am and I mean it - totally flying solo at 55 in a very sad world. Friends fill some of the void. But at the end of the day...we have to live in our world today. I feel such peace being connected to you all. I am here for all of you. Sue

At 12:31am on January 31, 2011, michael sandoval said…
Dear Julie , I am truly sorry for your loss, my condolences. I hope we can be friends
At 1:39pm on January 05, 2010, Ruby Smith gave Julie Dolsey-Weiss a gift
Thanks for being there!
At 7:51pm on November 04, 2009, Julie Dolsey-Weiss added a gift to their profile…
In Loving Memory of Julia Dolsey, Ozzie Dolsey and Patricia Dolsey
At 8:55am on September 11, 2009, Carrie A Williams said…
Hi Julie-

Just thinking about you this morning and hoping you are doing okay!

At 1:23pm on September 4, 2009, Carrie A Williams said…
How irritating and insulting....SHE needs space. Perhaps you are better off without this friend....seems like an awful thing to say considering what you are going through.

Well, I am here for you anytime and I sincerely mean that. I hope that you are VERY proud of yourself and what you are accomplishing in the middle of this awful situation. Congrats on being in your final 8 weeks....that is AWESOME! You may not feel so strong right now but you are and, when the time comes for you to graduate, if you need someone there.....I will be that someone for you and I mean this from the bottom of my heart.

Do you still have things that you have to take care of (meaning bills, estate accounts and whatnot)?? This is an area that I am having a lot of trouble with right now. It is so overwhelming. I had to sell my parents house, go to court to get appointed Personal Representative, hire an attorney, open an estate account, sell their cars, cancel insurance etc etc and I have a stack of medical and other miscellaneous bills that I have to take care of. I wonder if life is ever going to feel "normal" again!
At 11:14am on September 3, 2009, Carrie A Williams said…
Hi Julie-

How are you? I hope you are well today. Please do not apologize for repeating yourself..my mind has been so confused that I have trouble keeping track of anything I do or say right now so I completely understand.

I am sorry that this friend chose to walk away from you at this time. It is hard to understand why someone would do this. I really do not have anyone that I feel I can talk to about this. People do NOT understand and I think most of them would rather avoid the topic altogether, as they are uncomfortable and do not know what to say.

Hey, by the way, we are both in Wisconsin. I am in Kenosha.
At 7:01pm on September 2, 2009, Carrie A Williams said…
Hi Julie-
I can not thank you enough for responding. When I read what you had wrote, it was the first time I felt there might be someone out there who understands the fear and loneliness I am consumed by. I am so sorry for what you are also going through. I know the pain and fear. I hope that somehow we can support each other and come out on the other side of this okay. I have a friend who keeps telling me that one day it will be the norm that my parents are gone....I cannot EVEN imagine ever feeling that way.

I have been married for 10 wonderful years and love my husband deeply but this has caused so much strain on us that I even feel alienated from him. We have not even spoke in 2 days even though we are in the same house. I am scared that I will end up alone. My marriage has never been through anything like this and it is taking its' toll. I don't know how to fix it.

My Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in March 2008 that had spread to his bone, spine and brain. He died June 28, 2008. My Mom was already getting ill with Picks Disease but it was still so mild that her symptoms went unnoticed with everything else going on. My father wanted to die in his home and my Mom would not give him medicine or take care of him (not because she did not want to, she could not...she would get hysterical). I figured it was the grief and pain. I had to move in with them and care for my Dad. Then, when he passed, I needed my Mom so and she was not there at all. I could not figure out what was going on.....I thought she was having a nervous breakdown due to losing my Dad. As the weeks were passing by, my Mom was getting really out of touch. Pick's Disease is a rare degenerative brain illness that causes dementia. In February of 2009, she was still living alone and paying her bills and, by March 30, I was moving her into a facility and she was calling me Mom. She lost the ability to talk and walk. I took her to so many doctors and I was told everything from Alzheimers to mental illness. Her doctor even put her in a lock down mental ward for a week....it was HORRIBLE. I was alone with her at the doctor the day I was told that she had Pick's Disease and was going to die. Throughout the whole time I took care of her, I learned to never show emotion because she was like a child and would look to me for reactions to things the doctors were saying. I never cried in front of her and I never grieved my Dad. By May, she was in a wheelchair, had no communication and her arms and legs were completely contracted. My Mom passed on June 3, 2009. This day is my parents wedding anniversary and mine as well. It was less than one year after my Dad died and the first anniversary she would have had without him. My father was 60 when he died and my mother was 62.

I hope to hear from you soon.
Take care and thanks again for reaching out to me.
At 1:12pm on September 1, 2009, Laura Villarreal said…
Hey Julie, I am a CMA but currently do not work. After I completed my MA and worked for a couple of years I decided to complete my B.S. in Business. After that I worked as an exec. asst. to two hospital directors. Got really burned out and started working on my teacher's certification...spent the last two years working as a substitute teacher. I feel you can never learn too much...where will you be doing your internship?
At 3:44pm on August 30, 2009, Laura Villarreal said…
June 22 is the day my numbness ended. I remember this day well because I had an appointment with my physician. A little history so you know why I remember this day so well...my daughter died in North Pole, Alaska-I live in San Antonio, Texas. Her accident happened at 12:15 pm and she was declared dead at 12:49 pm. This was on a Monday. I kept everything inside because I had so much to do for her Memorial Service here at home but before this was to take place my niece and I flew to Fairbanks for a private viewing and her cremation. We returned home and planned her service for June 7. We then returned to Fairbanks for her service there on June 13. The week after I returned I was so exhausted. When I went for my doctor's visit on the 22nd I broke down completely and cried like I had never cried before. I was referred immediately to a therapist. I refused medication because I was afraid of not feeling any emotions, good or bad, so I toughed it out. It was a "roller coaster ride from hell" without the meds but I made it through okay. Your emotions will range from numbness, to sadness, to anger and everything in between. I don't tell you this to scare you but to let you know that they are normal during the grieving process. If you can, meet with a therapist. I visited my therapist twice and have not felt the need to return. I found my grief was more pronounced when I was tired. Mornings are usually good but every now and then I wake up feeling sad. If I feel like crying I cry and I usually feel better when I'm done. This is what I mean when I say be kind to yourself-allow yourself to grieve, don't bury it.
Feel free to ask me anything about my grieving experience-I don't mind sharing.
Julie, maybe your mom did not want you to know how serious her condition was, or maybe she did not want to accept it herself, but don't blame yourself.
Try to recall the happier times spent with your mom and embrace the love you have for each other; this will help you during this difficult time.
Your friend,
At 1:42pm on August 30, 2009, Laura Villarreal said…
Hello again Julie,

Thank you for your condolences on the loss of my daughter. I can tell you that on June 22 is when the "numb" stage of grief ended for me. Though there are several stages of grief they don't always happen in the order presented by the experts. Take life one day a time and most important, be kind to yourself. Grieving can take a very emotional as well as physical toll on a person if we allow it.
We are here for each other on this website so never hesitate to post memories of your mom or feelings you may be struggling with. I have found that writing, whether on here or in my private journal, has helped me tremendously.
Take care, Julie. My thoughts and prayers are with you today.

At 8:39am on August 30, 2009, Laura Villarreal said…
My heartfelt condolences on the loss of your mom. The bond between mother and daughter is like no other...my only child, my 33 year old daughter, was killed in a tragic accident on May 25, 2009. Missing her is all I do these days. Moving forward is a slow, painful process but it will happen. There is no time table for grieving.
I have found the members of this website to be very caring and supportive; we all share the common bond of grief.
Share as much as you are comfortable with and if you would like to post a photo of your mom that would be nice.
Keep us posted on your internship; I am also a medical assistant and I really enjoyed my internship with a cardiology group.
Take care.

Latest Activity

Ess left a comment for Kristy J Sykes
"i am so sorry for your loss.  I hope you find support here.  Welcome !!"
Ess commented on Paula Romano's blog post Looking for virtual grieving meeting?
"Hi....i must admit...i expected this community to be more active/responsive.  Ive seen so many blogs with no comments.  Im struggling too...i just made a first blog entry.  Have u found support anywhere ?  I am completely sorry…"
Kristy J Sykes is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 21
Elizabeth skelsey updated their profile
Mar 20
John McConnell joined Karen's group

I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
Mar 19
John McConnell joined Diana, Grief Recovery Coach's group

I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Mar 19
Ess commented on Speed Weasel's blog post New Year Yet Old Memories and Dreams Continue
"    i dont think you can...letting go....AND being ok...is elusive.  I am trying to be Ok...with the memory of all my losses incorporated, while realising that some days will be ok.....and other moments wont.  Yet....its ALL…"
Mar 19
Ess commented on Deborah 's blog post What’s next
"  It struck me that you said...u still feel married.  i say that too...and its been 6 yrs for me.  I wonder if we will ever be able to let that feeling go.   I was with him 42 yrs....more than i was home with mother n…"
Mar 19

© 2023   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service