Comments - When your world has morphed into the unknown.. - Online Grief Support - A Social Community2024-03-29T08:53:06Zhttp://www.onlinegriefsupport.com/profiles/comment/feed?attachedTo=2054931%3ABlogPost%3A157014&xn_auth=noI think you shouldn't be that…tag:www.onlinegriefsupport.com,2013-04-30:2054931:Comment:1573972013-04-30T13:39:47.537ZMelisa Chttp://www.onlinegriefsupport.com/profile/MelisaC
<p>I think you shouldn't be that hard on yourself. After what happened to your sister, who wouldn't be questioning everything. I guess whenever we are faced with losing someone we love, it's bound to happen that we feel we live in a different world. What you are feeling for this other man could be a way to hang on a bit to life, to deal with the pain. Like wanting to find a light in the middle of all the things you are going through.</p>
<p>Don't beat yourself over it. One can feel guilty over…</p>
<p>I think you shouldn't be that hard on yourself. After what happened to your sister, who wouldn't be questioning everything. I guess whenever we are faced with losing someone we love, it's bound to happen that we feel we live in a different world. What you are feeling for this other man could be a way to hang on a bit to life, to deal with the pain. Like wanting to find a light in the middle of all the things you are going through.</p>
<p>Don't beat yourself over it. One can feel guilty over feeling something but if it doesn't have serious consequences (since you say he wont pursue it), then what's the point in suffering for it.</p>
<p></p> I so wish that I didn't have…tag:www.onlinegriefsupport.com,2013-04-29:2054931:Comment:1575502013-04-29T16:23:22.610ZChristine Leakeyhttp://www.onlinegriefsupport.com/profile/ChristineLeakey
<p>I so wish that I didn't have these feelings. I feel like they make me a horrible person and not only am I potentially ruining my marriage but because I even said anything to this other guy, I may have ruined his friendship with my husband. Which was not my intention at all. I just find myself wishing so desperately that things could be different, that timing was little different so that I could feel the way this other guys makes me feel all the time. He made me feel totally happy and excited…</p>
<p>I so wish that I didn't have these feelings. I feel like they make me a horrible person and not only am I potentially ruining my marriage but because I even said anything to this other guy, I may have ruined his friendship with my husband. Which was not my intention at all. I just find myself wishing so desperately that things could be different, that timing was little different so that I could feel the way this other guys makes me feel all the time. He made me feel totally happy and excited and wanted... But he doesn't want to pursue anything because he is friends with my husband and I can't fault him for that.. it's one of the things that I admire about him. He's everything I've ever wanted in a man, I just found him a few years too late.</p> I met my bf of 18 yrs.when w…tag:www.onlinegriefsupport.com,2013-04-25:2054931:Comment:1570402013-04-25T10:08:01.794ZDebby Sulariehttp://www.onlinegriefsupport.com/profile/DebbySularie
<p> I met my bf of 18 yrs.when we were 30.We have a boy 15 n girl 14.I thought I had met the man of my dreams,and for a long time,I really had.We have been through hard times but remained faithful.When my brother died,I have never been the same.I seem to have been doing alot of what your experiencing.Losing someone I love as much as I did my brother,changed me and my entire perspective on things in life I thought were fine. For me,I guess its making me realize life is so unpredictable and with…</p>
<p> I met my bf of 18 yrs.when we were 30.We have a boy 15 n girl 14.I thought I had met the man of my dreams,and for a long time,I really had.We have been through hard times but remained faithful.When my brother died,I have never been the same.I seem to have been doing alot of what your experiencing.Losing someone I love as much as I did my brother,changed me and my entire perspective on things in life I thought were fine. For me,I guess its making me realize life is so unpredictable and with that,it shook me to the core.I,too have been rethinking how I do things,how I feel I deserve someone who really 'gets' me on an emotional level that I'm not getting.Don't beat yourself up over it because if things are changing,its probably something thats been there for awhile now.And no one is a failure if things don't turn out the way we 'planned' them.Your only human an like anyone else,you deserve to be happy.Take one day at a time.My brothers death has changed me.I can't put it into words,but much of what your feeling,I've had and continue to have in my life.Losing someone so close forces us to really look at ourselves.Sometimes,it makes us realize we deserve to be happy because we finally realized how real death is.I wish you the best.As far as the children are concerned,in the end,as long as you are happy and do whats best for your well being,the kids will be fine.If us Moms are not happy,the kids see it,they really do.I'm still not sure what I'm going to do,but I'm not going to settle for less then being happy.Good luck n take care.</p>