I think that most of us being through the craps of life in 2st person, 2nd, 3rd or all 3 at same time; can use a little less weights to carry. Keeping the relationships light or as light as possible, responsibilities down to the basics and not buying into any additional drama can do a lot more good than we think. The tendency is to see all life from a suffering lens in a forever horizon, or alternatively just svery short ter makes feel a little better type of thing. It can be common to enter into more heavy loads because that´s what we got used to and it´s all too familiar. But eventually life sucks from all ends and we need a break. A time the clock and peers and life events are kept to the simple of feel ok but not at the expense of somrthing else. Being that health in any level, emotional, heavy drinking, or just pleasures for pleasures of the flash. There is a time WE GET REAL, and most often the finances are a good indicator of where our priorities REALLY are. And how much we are doing to really move along life in a pace that taes consideration of how much we can take on without digging a whole under our feet. And to make our feet travel more light, sometimes expectations have to be lost and a new horizon can be of all things and anything and everything. Perhaps not time to narrow down too much just because we can´t take much and finding the healthy pace and peers around that in good sintony to help finding the new flow of energy with life that will work is a must. Pressures are unhealthy. Most times people assume the GRIEVING part is doing NOTHING. Or perhaps the moves are so slow that aren´t accepted even by ourselves. See, the nothing to one is a full range of emotions trying to be sorted out so that the decisions will be accurate. And time is a friend of the grieving and not the enemy. There are plenty people out there running god knows to what just to find out that wasn´t good or didn´t satisfy. THe SATISFACTION with life is an inside job, really. Introspects know it all too well that looking at commercials and buying things aren´t going to do it. Thinking is intrinsic, adapting is necessary, and moving along is really not something that can be ever measured by anyone else unless they lived in our shoes all their lives and had the exact same views and logic for life we have. I find odd that people think money wil do. Marriage will do. Children will do. A good job will do. A great pay check doing noting will do. And really none of that will do much of anything other than keeping us entertained and shift attention to outside life events and what else and who else and all ELSE, but what´s boiling inside us craving to coexist inside this body and mind precious as is. And whatever means going through things that are lets say less appealling to others to stick around for all the wrong reasons are most likely to be a lot more obvious in the lack of all the DISTRACTIONS. After shelter and food and the basics, there is little else that can be REAL to occupy the minds of someone GRIEFING. It´s ok to ACCEPT self moving along all the SOCIETY EXPECTATIONS without feeling any until there is PURPOSE. And all else is sometimes just feels like clothes that people try to put on us to look good FOR THEM. THere is a numb self trying as hard as hell just to find it´s way to keep smiling among the living. And is hell tired of anything FAKE and the cheap words and thoughts that shape society in a very shallow level of existence. Good lord, part of being through hell and back is understanding we are not going to want to be back as used to be, because we grew out of that place and are searching for something more consistent with who we are now, and with this society really, tehre are too many mirrors around that are twisted to thousand agendas but our own. And struggle is a HHEALTHY part of life. If most were to endure all, they would be a whole lot nicer to deal with and a lot more humane. Other than that, it´s just too simple to stick around some more. HELP or MAKE ME SMILE, or KISS MY ASS because by continuing to live in my body and mind here and finding the sincrony with the world outside is a daily challenge that if we miss we go derrailed LONG LONG WAYS...decades or more. And I am not doing that. DOING ME now for a change, and allowing just the soft sidw of who wants to get near me and keep the place I gave there, or will kick out few times until alone is just a perfect PRESENT tense consistent to my EXISTENCE.

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Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, Bluebell,   thanks for the love and for caring.  I am still afraid of not knowing what happens to people that end their life.  I wouldnt want to ruin my only chance to be with her again.  Then again, wouldn’t a…"
1 hour ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia, I thought about it but it was never a real possibility for me. As I said earlier, there is nothing in this world that would hurt my mom more than ending my own life. I will never do it. I try to be careful. I'm such a religious…"
17 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Agree with you Virginia. Sometimes we actually dont know what we are doing."
19 hours ago
Mike H. posted a blog post

What Can Help Me if I'm Depressed?

The best help comes from “God, Who comforts and encourages and refreshes and cheers the depressed.”—2 Corinthians 7:6, The Amplified Bible.What God gives to help the depressedStrength. God “refreshes and cheers” you, not by removing all your problems, but by answering your prayers when you pray for the strength to cope. (…See More
21 hours ago
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, Im sure you were giving your Mom the medicines that you thought were best at the time.  Did you ask the doctor if that one dose would have made a difference?  Sadly, it probably wouldn’t have. I had no idea there were only a few…"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks bluebell. Yes I joined the group so that I can discuss by grief and get some good advices. Virginia, same thing happened with me as well. My mother oncologist was also not telling me complete details amd just use to say that only few days…"
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi I am very sorry for your loss. I understand the sadness and guilt you are going through right now; all of us do. This is a good place to come and talk and share your feelings. You may not get an answer back right away sometimes, but there has…"
yesterday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi,   welcome, people on here are very supportive.  I am going through the same guilt as far as what happened in the end.  In the hospital, I didn’t talk to the doctors enough, I don’t know what I was doing.  Now I…"
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia It sounds like you are in a very dark place. Before it gets too bad, I beg of you to reach out for help. Call 911 if you have to. Trust that you will feel better than you do now and you have to be alive to find that out. Bluebell"
yesterday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"  As always, Brett thank you for your caring posts.  I think you could be a writer or counselor.  Thanks everyone else for support also.  I can’t offer any help because I dont know what to do.  I was thinking tonight,…"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Guys This is Avi and I am from India. I lost my mother on 15 may after her 7 months battle with last stage gall bladder cancer.  The grief that I possess now is that although I was closely monitoring her treatment since the first day, I was…"
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, I feel like a hypocrite when I try to think of something to say to you that would bring you peace. Because I know that I would feel the same way you do if that had happened to me. There was something. Before my mom came home on Hospice, she…"
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
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Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett Crystal and Bluebell are so right, I feel comfort and I smile when reading your posts.   I know I was trying to get to her, but I say maybe it was not meant for me to be there when her heart stopped, maybe she wanted that way, but…"
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Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett you always bring light to our darkest thoughts. I am so thankful to know you. I wrill try to tell myself that from now on, that my mom would want me to live. "
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia, I know that you don't want to wait until your old to be with your mom. Neither do I. I told you earlier that after my mom died I considered ending my own life, but I could just see my mom if I had tried, screaming, "NO!!" We…"
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I wish I hadn't posted so quickly this morning. I had some type'o's. I meant to say that my mom held out her hand before she died. She was holding it upwards. It was an awesome thing to see, though at the time it didn't mean so…"
Friday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Crystal, I read some of your posts, we have a lot in common.  I read you were also close to your Grandma and lost her and then your Mom and aren’t close to your Dad.  Same here.  My Mom was an only child too so my Granny, Mom,…"
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Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Virginia, reading your posts was like going through all my feelings of guilt the first few weeks after my mom died.  All the times I was horrible to her, the times I got frustrated when she wouldn't eat right or when I complained about…"
Thursday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, I love reading your posts even though they are for Virginia. They help me to0 Virginia, My thoughts and prayers are with you. I pray that you find some peaceful moments. It is okay to find some peace. It does not take away from how much you…"
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