As much as I´d like to take life quite serious, it´s not necessarily in my control and each jerk reaction out there yeah, I want to kick ass too. There is kiss, kick and put up with and as much as I´d love not to engage, life engages a few of those in that daily course of life perhaps to make sure we also belong to HUMAN RACE in the full range of what means to be part of it. I wonder what time does. Some people seems to be highly unaffected by time, positive or negative, more like 5 year olds or something like that. Usually I hold my tongue pretty good and when patient, I just walk away from the human crapness. But if I was to live by avoidance I´d never leave home, for sure. It does take a fair amount of patience to come across the rush rush and piss off in traffic and can be quite an experience with peers and friends. Although I feel LIGHTER mood than before, I still dump here and then, telling this guy in traffic to go to hell or fuck off, because they dumped first, and there is a justified jerk knee reaction that is better than the alternatives...hehe. Guys wil be guys, Girls will be girls. Some doctors are a real pain in the ass too. There is family going crazy too. And there is ME. Trying to alleviate my pain and get back in the living with a big to do list for what I care. I have come to a point of agreement with myself. Where I don´t care what, I won´t guilt myself. I will try to DUMP less often, but the garbage being dumped out on the streets here is umbeliavable. My city is currently amongst the most violent in the world, we aren´t used to this at all. We are enduring an economic crisis. So, people are on the eddge out there before I leave the quiet and peace of my home. And meeting friends, they are stressed out about their jobs and blah. I just got more collect and centered and I can do a couple things a day if less in pain and stress, it depends. I do what I need to do and come back ok. There are times I want to hide from the world when there is too much crap my way, and there are times I have to give some crap back to make it through and not dump on the wrong peers and places. And there is a lot that I get to be quiet because desn´t add up, and in time maybe it will, maybe it won´t. I am hoping that life gets better to this community I am in for th time being, that would save some ears and just make it nicer. All in all, I cannot complain much, I just refuse to stop living on one side of the equation, and try the exposure just enough that I can still win the day, whatever that means, maybe meet the obligations and rest and relax and just take all as it comes. With dog and bird here, I have a zoo right at home with my dog jealous at my dad´s bird, we are still living. I guess this is a good point, mind you I don´t mind improving my health enough to go back to work. But can´t make plans a whole lot, IT´S A DAY AT A TIME. And trust me, it can be hard enough in a pain day to find peace among the LIVING, never mind everything else. Sight

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Billy Jo Colt commented on Pamela philipp's blog post I need advice
"Hi Pamela, I can understand your situation as you aretorn between two worlds. Your daughter in her own way is trying to help you with your grieving process. She thinks that her way is the only way through your grief. It is also a confrontation you…"
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Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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morgan commented on Pamela philipp's blog post I need advice
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Virginia G posted a discussion

What’s the point

Whats the point of living if there’s no happiness?  If you don’t care about anything except being with the person you lost...if everything is meaningless...if you can’t stand the pain or the numbness...if you don’t belong anywhere..if everything feels wrong...if you have no idea what to do about it...if you can’t get through the daySee More
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Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Pamela philipp posted a blog post

I need advice

I have been very stressed and upset my daughter came back to my house for a while until she and her family gets on their feet which is not the problem the problem is she has made me get all the things that are important to me out of the house and put in the garage pictures mementos etc. because she thinks that I need to move on she said because it has been three years and she does not understand how she is upsetting me I don't want to be in this house like this anymore how do I make her…See More
14 hours ago
Denise Lavoie left a comment for Pamela philipp
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am realizing the only people that truly love me are my family. So how am I expected to live without them?"
bluebird replied to Kristen Harlow's discussion Feeling alone
"I agree, that is a big step. You should be proud of yourself for being able to take that step. ((((Hugs))))"
Fran left a comment for Denise Lavoie
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Denise Lavoie commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Kristen Harlow replied to Kristen Harlow's discussion Feeling alone
"Such a good question. No, probably not. I've finally come to the place where I have accepted that I have to accept it's over. That feels like a big step."
bluebird replied to Kristen Harlow's discussion Feeling alone
"That is a lot of shit to deal with, all at once. It's good your sister is ok now.  If the man who you feel is your best friend and the love of your life were to come back now, do you think you would be ready to be with him now?"
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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