This actually happened to me today.

 

I have been at the end of any rope I can hang onto in recent weeks. Im not going to blame this on the loss of my brother, Lyle in December. Its been a hard road for a long time. I felt as I was walking into my daughters school today that I had lost my Faith. It has never happened to me. When we lost Lyle I felt my Faith solidify. I felt closer to Heaven then I've ever been.

Whitney left her winter boots and glasses at home today. Thats how it all started. I just needed to get myself in order enough to bring them into the office. She happened to be next to the office. Blessing number one...

As I looked at her, kissed her goodbye and walked out, the school secretary Connie stopped me. She looked me in the eye and said "I have been thinking on you, girl. I have been thinking on you alot.."

I cried immediately, knowing how Faithful Connie is. She is the Lord's messenger. Everyone pray for her. I lost my Faith, without a job or a car on the brink of losing my house. A car came my way, I thought it was a Gift. Lyle was always proud of taking care of me. Especially in the Dad departement. We lost my Dad when he was 5 and I was 7. The car's engine bombed 10 days after I bought it... It crumbled me. I couldve sworn it was meant to be, you know?

Connie told me today, "Its hard to hang on, Jordan. Sometimes things come into your view that are easier to see. But you have to remember what He gave to you. And what He still has for you. And sometimes its easier to see those things that feel closer, but He gave you a gift. And keep looking at that. You are your Mom, Jordan. (Not you HAVE your Mom like everyone else says.) Keep looking ahead."

I could barely use my legs to walk out the door, friends.

"Carry On My Wayward Son, You'll Have Peace When You Are Done. Lay Your Weary Head To Rest. Don't You Cry No More."

If you dont think God is with my right now as I right this with still a heavy heart.. Im listening to Pandora, where they pick the songs for you and these have come on just in the time it took me to write this...

Southern Cross- Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young

Carry On-Kansas

Landslide- Fleetwood Mac

Golden Slumbers/Carry That Weight/ The End- Beatles (that came from somewhere else, though... not sure how to explain it...)

 

Dont EVER Give Up Hope,

Jordan Christine Hunt

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