Hadn't been able to listen to music until tonight.
It didn't destroy me the way I thought it would.
The memories come flooding back but I didn't break down like I thought I would.
Am I in shock?
Am I numb?
Is something wrong with me?
Or is this part of the grief.
My heart feels like it has a chunk missing now. But it no longer feels like there is a knife sticking out of it.

Views: 71

Comment

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

Comment by Jason on March 18, 2016 at 9:41am
FLORA, some made me cry. Some I listened to knowing they would make me cry.
Some I hadn't heard in decades.
We were together 26 years. That was half of her life and just short of half of mine.
I was a logical person. I understand she is gone. I don't know when my mind will wrap itself around it. Or if it should.
I feel her with me most of the time.
Some after death things have happened.
I believe she is waiting for me.
I just have to raise our 5 yo twins, be here for them, then we can be together again forever.
Comment by FLORA on March 18, 2016 at 8:51am

Jason, I think it's part of the grief. I'm experiencing the same feelings. Sometimes it's seems to be getting a little easier for me, some of the anxiety has lessoned, although I still can't listen to his favorite songs or watch his favorite TV programs or movies, just too many memories.  But I think I'm finally coming to the reality that he's gone, Gone forever!!! I will never see him or hear his voice again, NEVER. But I'll never accept his death, I'll only live through it, and hope that each day gets a little easier, and maybe one day I can be happy again.

Latest Activity

Rebecca Donnelly is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
bluebird replied to Sharron Anderson's discussion Numbness and Anger
"Hi Sharron; just checking in.  I hope you're doing all right, considering."
Jan 23
Sandy Blosser is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jan 21
Erica is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jan 16
Diana, Grief Recovery Coach and Denise Lavoie are now friends
Jan 14
Michael Lorincz is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jan 8
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Same here."
Jan 7
Drewtoo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"I can understand how that makes it even more difficult, having become a couple on that occasion. I don't want to live without him, and I just don't feel that will ever change. So, it all seems so futile to go through this every day. "
Jan 7

© 2023   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service