Where do I put the deep affection I have for my father? Affection is to give, to share, becomes lonely and distraught without it's intended. Once love is generated and layered upon itself over time, it is like a being of it's own, breathing with those that share it. I am lonely and distraught; I want this love, this energy to be put to good use in the world in some way. Right now, it is a small caged bird, it's wings fluttering against the bars.

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susan  Paull Comment by susan Paull on December 16, 2009 at 12:48pm
Thank you Laura; my heart goes out to you.
Laura Villarreal Comment by Laura Villarreal on December 16, 2009 at 9:14am
Susan, you say so beautifully what I have been feeling for the last 6 1/2 months...what is to be done with all the love and affection we shared with our loved ones who have passed? This energy does not dissipate or transfer...it is always there bouncing off the inner walls of my heart.
Thank you for sharing.
Laura

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Books

To One In Sorrow

Let me come in where you are weeping, friend,
And let me take your hand.
I, who have known a sorrow such as yours, can understand.
Let me come in--I would be very still beside you in your grief;
I would not bid you cease your weeping, friend,
Tears bring relief. Let me come in--and hold your hand,
For I have known a sorrow such as yours, And understand.

-Grace Noll Crowell

The Light Beyond

The Gift That Freed Me To Give

A significant lesson for me has been understanding and accepting that our greatest gains often come through experiences in our lives that may be extremely painful. My father, Raphel Orval Beason, died less than four months before I was born at the age of 19 in an explosion at the Port Chicago U.S. Navy arsenal near Oakland, Calif. He was among 320 men killed on July 17, 1944, when two merchant ships blew next to...

The loss of a son

Mother's Day will always be the anniversary of my son's death, no matter what date it falls on. May 9, 2010, the day I lost a piece of my heart. I have vivid memories of that day but they are brief glimpses only. He called that morning to tell me Happy Mother's Day Mom! I love you! I remember being 250 miles away from my home, my other child and my family. I don't know...

Try tapping, it works wonders...

I don't often recommend specific methods to help with grief. But the self-help method I'm going to tell you about - EFT or Emotional Freedom Techniques - is well worth making an exception for. Basically, it involves tapping on the acupuncture points to tap into your body's own energy and healing power. If you think that sounds a little far-fetched and woo-woo, so did I. In fact, I starting doing EFT on myself for chronic...

Daughter of Suicide

It has been 22 and a half years since my mother’s suicide in October 1987. I look at that number – 22 – and it startles me. It’s hard to believe that I have lived more of my life without my mother, than with her. During those first 10 years after her death I carried the heavy load of her suicide every waking moment. I struggled with my own depression and feelings of abandonment and...

8 practical ways to help a grieving family

When a friend or family member experiences the death of a loved one, we quickly offer our condolences and help. Listed here are eight practical suggestions for helping a friend or family member that has just suffered a loss. 1. Offer to answer the telephone or answer emails at the family's home. Telephone calls and email can take up a considerable amount of time. Take messages and give information to friends and family. 2. Volunteer...

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