April 2021 Blog Posts (5)

Feedback to a Friend

I had a conversation right after a posting that I put on Facebook referencing Jen (and since deleted) with a friend.  They made a comment about the possibility of a 'spirit' being trapped in limbo if the griever does not release them (get through the grief).  The comment has been rattling around in my brain for a couple months, and not in a good way.  It hurt.  It angered me.  The message received by me was that I was harming (trapping at least) her spirit by still being grief…

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Added by Speed Weasel on April 16, 2021 at 12:00pm — No Comments

Can You Spare a Dime?

I thought I was done. Recovery in process. Moving on...But the Tilt-A-Whirl does not stop. Or maybe it is more accurate to say that my mind does not let it stop.

After meeting Jen's family back in August 2020, I had been reflecting on the visit. The soul crushing sadness is gone. Replaced by a low-level sadness, sure. But I think that I needed confirmation that the person I knew was really the person others knew her as too. I was afraid that the two would not be…
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Added by Speed Weasel on April 9, 2021 at 2:30pm — No Comments

Numbness setting in again

I was not sure if my mic would work on here

I lost my mum today I did

Now the numbness is setting in again

I think I must have been on autopilot all day no it's starting to sit in and kick in again like I did 9 year ago

Added by dream moon JO B on April 5, 2021 at 3:30pm — 2 Comments

Another Thought For Today

Things are just resonating with me today, I guess, and I'm actually in a place where I can write my thoughts. I read this one just a bit ago... "Feelings of grief recede, but feelings of loss remain ever-present."

Another one that hits home as I define what this journey is that I'm on. It seems to more accurately describe how I have felt all along. As I was a 2-year old when my Mother died 42-plus years ago, I don't think I could have had the capacity to consciously grieve.…

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Added by Dixie Allison Duke on April 4, 2021 at 6:21pm — 1 Comment

Thought for Today

I just read something that I hope will stick with me for some time to come.

"Some things in life cannot be fixed. They can only be carried."

I am not sure why right now, but that seems to resonate with me. I have carried grief with me my entire life, and I feel like for the longest time I was hoping I'd wake up one day and realize the shroud of grief hanging on my shoulders was finally gone. That day still has not come. However, maybe it is not realistic to expect that…

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Added by Dixie Allison Duke on April 4, 2021 at 2:38pm — No Comments

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