Sue
  • Female
  • Millville, NJ
  • United States
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Sue updated their profile
Jan 18
Sue joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
Jan 18
Sue and Brenda Ann are now friends
Oct 31, 2017
Brenda Ann left a comment for Sue
"So sorry to welcome you to www.onlinegriefsupport.com. I lost my dad 9 months ago to COPD/emphysema. Watching him go was a terrible experience! I tried to comfort him and spent about 20 of his last hours singing to him and playing music he loved.…"
Oct 31, 2017
Sue is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Oct 24, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
I love life and I always try to see the positive side of every bad situation but sometimes depression sets in and i need to talk about things to friends and/or family but its hard to burden them with my problems. I have anxiety issues, its harder for me to open up to someone face to face. I have lost family members and friends but the loss of my dad is the worst pain ever.
About my Loss:
The most hurtful loss in my life was when i watched as my dad pass away 6 months ago of emphysema and COPD. He passed away the day after Father’s Day, Its been tough and its affecting my relationship with everyone, I don’t really want engage in social activities anymore, i know its not healthy, my doctor said i need grief counseling but its tough for me to talk face to face, i am giving this a try as i am trying to help myself move forward instead of the what-ifs and things i keep looking back to.
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At 11:10am on October 31, 2017, Brenda Ann said…

So sorry to welcome you to www.onlinegriefsupport.com. I lost my dad 9 months ago to COPD/emphysema. Watching him go was a terrible experience! I tried to comfort him and spent about 20 of his last hours singing to him and playing music he loved. They told me he could hear me and encouraged me to keep singing and playing music. I guess it did comfort us both...

I really appreciated a brochure, WHEN SOMEONE YOU LOVE DIES. I think the advise in the brochure is very practical.

"*** we pp. 14-15 How Can I Live With My Grief? ***
Talking can be a helpful release. Following the death of all ten of his children, as well as some other personal tragedies, the ancient patriarch Job said: “My soul certainly feels a loathing toward my life. I will give vent to [Hebrew, “loose”] my concern about myself. I will speak in the bitterness of my soul!” (Job 1:2, 18, 19; 10:1) Job could no longer restrain his concern. He needed to let it loose; he had to “speak.” Similarly, the English dramatist Shakespeare wrote in Macbeth: “Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart and bids it break.”
So talking about your feelings to “a true companion” who will listen patiently and sympathetically can bring a measure of relief. (Proverbs 17:17) Putting experiences and feelings into words often makes it easier to understand them and to deal with them. And if the listener is another bereaved person who has effectively dealt with his or her own loss, you may be able to glean some practical suggestions on how you can cope. When her child died, one mother explained why it helped to talk to another woman who had faced a similar loss: “To know that somebody else had gone through the same thing, had come out whole from it, and that she was still surviving and finding some sort of order in her life again was very strengthening to me.”
What if you are not comfortable talking about your feelings? Following the death of Saul and Jonathan, David composed a highly emotional dirge in which he poured out his grief. This mournful composition eventually became part of the written record of the Bible book of Second Samuel. (2 Samuel 1:17-27; 2 Chronicles 35:25) Similarly, some find it easier to express themselves in writing. One widow reported that she would write down her feelings and then days later read over what she had written. She found this a helpful release.
Whether by talking or writing, communicating your feelings can help you to release your grief. It can also help to clear up misunderstandings. A bereaved mother explains: “My husband and I heard of other couples that got divorced after losing a child, and we didn’t want that to happen to us. So any time we felt angry, wanting to blame each other, we would talk it out. I think we really grew closer together by doing that.” Thus, letting your feelings be known can help you to understand that even though you may be sharing the same loss, others may grieve differently—at their own pace and in their own way."

Let me know what you think of this advise...

Brenda

 
 
 

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M Adams left a comment for clarinda sprankle
"Dear Clarinda, what a terrible loss -- my heart goes out to you.  One of my uncles recently had to move into assisted living for similar reasons, so his wife is now on her own in their apartment.  She seems to be coping, but I'm…"
15 hours ago
Survivor17 updated their profile
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Survivor17 is now friends with Michael and clarinda sprankle
yesterday
Linda Engberg shared Kristina Rose's photo on Facebook
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear Morgan and Trina, Thanks for the two beautiful posts. We are so lucky to have this forum.It is a place we can come to and not be judged by the world for the way we feel. This is the only support we have to make it through our daily lives. Thank…"
yesterday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear morgan, Linda, John, Joe, Denise, JenShep, Monty, and all Those Others reading this, I empathize with you all. My heart goes out to you! I think one of the reasons that others who have not lost a spouse do not understand us is because as Linda…"
Wednesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear morgan, Linda, John, Joe, Denise, JenShep, Monty, and all Those Others reading this, I empathize with you all. My heart goes out to you! I think one of the reasons that others who have not lost a spouse do not understand us is because as Linda…"
Wednesday
Virginia G replied to mindy's discussion Feeling pretty well depressed
"What about your past?  I have so many regrets about mine.  I think about my whole life and everything I did wrong and how I want to do it over"
Wednesday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am thinking God is trying to tell me I deserve to be alone.   Theresa I know the Doors but don’t like them.  Im old. And I think the penny was from your Mom. Brett, I liked your line, “honking load of crap”.   And…"
Wednesday
mindy posted a discussion

Feeling pretty well depressed

My depression has been at it worse since I lost my grandpa it will be two years March 25th and my past bothers me alot too See More
Tuesday
Kristen Harlow posted a discussion

Feeling alone

I’ve been through a lot. In 2014, my father became officially bedridden on Christmas day due to Frontotemporal dementia and my sister was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. She went through operations, a colostomy bag, and 6 months of chemo. In 2015, my husband’s play went to Broadway, and for that play he was nominated for a Tony award, as was the play itself, the playwright, and 3 of the actors.We went to the Tony award ceremony on June 7, and the next day, out of the blue, he told me he…See More
Tuesday
Profile IconKristen Harlow, Susie A, Ginny Brown and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It isn't a secret how death affects many of us.  Its just avoided when the conversation comes up......For us it is as though we buried ourselves.  I think it is brave and necessary for those who have lost their beloved and still have…"
Tuesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Jen, You hit the nail on the head that all people on this site didn't have the kind of love we had with our spouses. They were our soulmates and we were as one."
Tuesday
JenShep commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I haven't posted in a while but I'm still in the same boat I was last time I posted and to come back here and read others' posts that sound so much like what I'm still going through is a bit of a comfort.  Joe, like you I…"
Tuesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi John, I still have the car my Husband and  bought in 2003. I keep it in tip top shape because it is still part of him and brings me comfort. After almost six years I still attend the annual workshop "Hope for the Holidays" given by…"
Tuesday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi I believe when you are talking to God your mom hears you she is right there. I also do not get any signals, but pay closer attention. I was praying to her one night because someone close to me is not well, and I said please mom help, please ask…"
Tuesday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I also talk to God now at my home or in temple. It makes me feel that I am talking to my mom.  I did not receive any signals which make me feel that my mother is nearby but I still believe that she can listen me. "
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, I wish I could go to church with you. Church is very emotional for me. It's a combination of sadness and a feeling that I am close to my mom there. I cry a lot at church. Not out loud, but I try to sit in the back now. I don't…"
Tuesday
John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"A few days ago, our old car blew a head gasket on the freeway as I was on the way for a consultation with a doctor about skin cancer.  I am a baby about it even though it's not life-threatening.  Another of those times when I feel so…"
Tuesday

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