Shane B Crone
  • Male
  • Beverly Hills, CA
  • United States
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Roy Edward Hunt left a comment for Shane B Crone
"Shane...My heart feels your pain, the same pain that I feel over the loss of my beautiful partner, Brad, who was only 35 years old. You and Christian should have had many wonderful years together and now you are suffering this traumatic loss at such…"
Sep 5, 2011
Sue Waxman replied to Shane B Crone's discussion The love of my life just fell off of a four story building and landed on a cement patio. Will I ever see him again? in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Dear Shane, I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved partner. The way his family has treated you is beyond ugly. What disrespect they show to you the person he loved. A lot of us have experienced the same garbage with our own families. Shane...I…"
Jul 31, 2011
Shane B Crone updated their profile photo
Jul 30, 2011
Shane B Crone joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
Jul 30, 2011
Shane B Crone is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 30, 2011

Profile Information

About Me:
I am a publicist and I live in Los Angeles.
About my Loss:
My partner fell off a four story building. He was taking photographs of one of our friends on her roof. We have been on her roof over a hundred times. He was taking some photos and stepped backwards and lost his balance and fell. There isn't a railing on the roof because it wasn't designed for people to be up there. He landed on a cement patio below.

I wasn't there. I found out that it took over 30 minutes for an ambulance to get there and when they finally arrived they didn't even run over to him. They asked my friend if she had his ID's. My friend yelled at them to help him. So eventually they took him to the ER.

When I got to the emergency room no one would tell me what was happening. Eventually a nurse told me that they had everyone working on him. After an hour a doctor came in and told me they couldn't save him.

A few hours after he passed it brought us to Sunday, which was Mother's day. There were so many things that happened while his mother was her....but in a nutshell she didn't do one that my partner would've wanted and she was only concerned about bank accounts and life insurance policies. While my family stayed in hotels and had to rent cars, his mom forced herself into my home. She tried to take everything and eventually she went to a hotel and I never heard from her again. I flew to Chicago to go to the funeral because she was having his body flown so he could be buried back home (Which he no longer considered his home) and I got a phone call from my partner's aunt telling me that his parents will physically hurt me if I try to show up to the funeral. I wasn't able to attend his funeral. I didn't get to see the burial.

There were so many other things that took place but the most important thing is I lost the love of my life, the one person who truly got me. We lived together and worked together. We literally spent almost 24 hours a day together for over seven years. I can't do one thing without it being a part of my life I shared with him. I run our company alone now and for the most part I still don't feel like he is gone. I mean I know he's no longer here but it feels like I can just call him or text him.

It's hard to relate to anyone. Most people don't know what to say and they give advice when they don't know what the hell they are talking about. I mean I didn't get to say goodbye and I don't want to say losing a mother to cancer is not as bad as a tragic death for a young person because you had time to say goodbye.

All I know is I hope to see him again someday...and the idea of not seeing him again makes me question life. What's the point of life? Why does stuff like this have to happen?

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At 12:58pm on September 5, 2011, Roy Edward Hunt said…
Shane...My heart feels your pain, the same pain that I feel over the loss of my beautiful partner, Brad, who was only 35 years old. You and Christian should have had many wonderful years together and now you are suffering this traumatic loss at such a young age. But your youth is a benefit - you will move on with your life when you're ready. I'm not so sure about myself. I am not a religious person, but I do believe that God = love = energy and energy can't be destroyed. That energy (soul if you will) exists outside the body (contrary to Christian beliefs) and so the attachment we have to the other people in our lives is never lost. I feel Brad's energy around me all the time and I often connect most strongly with it in my dreams.  A friend of mine created a small, Buddhist-like shrine on the lanai where Brad lost his life in our pool.  Just a bouquet of flowers, a candle, and a few personal items that had meaning for the two of us. I can't tell you how much peace that shrine brought to me those first few days after his death. The shrine is gone now, but I still feel his presence whenever I go out to the lanai. I am gearing myself up for a memorial service on 9/17, when our friends will get together and tell Brad stories and talk about the influence he had on our lives. Then we'll float his ashes out to sea in a rice paper "boat." It might help if you and your friends have a similar service and though you won't have his ashes, perhaps a nice picture of him (you have so many) would be a substitute. I think that all of these little memorials are very helpful in the grieving process. But the most important thing to remember is that it's only his physical body that is separated from you. If you calmly reflect on all the wonderful moments you two shared, I think you'll feel his presence surrounding you like loving arms. At least that is my experience. Know that you are not alone - we all share your loss, as you share ours.
 
 
 

Latest Activity

JO B replied to JO B's discussion mad at god
"i feal lk i fild it coz of all loss sters so on u cud say vela link https://vimeo.com/156486350 embed"
1 hour ago
joanne commented on joanne's blog post No Title
"Hello bluebird, in response to your question about my dream, as I've mentioned on here before I have no religious beliefs so this has always made me very skeptical about any sort of afterlife, I've always believed  its some made up…"
2 hours ago
Lynn Williams commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"This weekend my stepson as his family visited from NM it was so wonderful. I decided to go to the cemetery with everyone to see Kyra's grave. It was only my second time going. It hit me so hard I couldn't stop sobbing. Do others have a…"
3 hours ago
pamela winmill replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Been  suggested  I might benefit  seeing a counsellor again someone who doesn't  know me or my husband and has not suffered the loss we all have, it is a comfort to come on this site and talk  to all of you who are…"
6 hours ago
Sandrw Mentiply posted photos
12 hours ago
Sandrw Mentiply left a comment for Felicia
"Good evening  Felicia how things are getting better for you.Sorry I haven't been on here in awhile.If you need someone to talk to any time am here for you.some times it helps to talk to another person and you will feel better am a good…"
12 hours ago
bluebird commented on joanne's blog post No Title
"joanne, I feel much the same as you do. I would like to ask you a question about your dream; if it is too painful to answer, please feel free to ignore my question. But I am wondering if your feeling in the dream was that your partner was saying the…"
19 hours ago
bluebird replied to Cecilia's discussion heart broken for my husband
"Many people here, including me, understand.  My husband and I never had children (another sadness in my life), but he also died very suddenly, and while my family (parents, sister, brother-in-law) are wonderful and love me (and I them) very…"
19 hours ago
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"It is ridiculous when people say shit like that (that your dead loved one "would want" you to be happy, etc.).  YOU know what he would or does want better than anyone else, just as I know what my husband would or does want better…"
19 hours ago
bluebird replied to Mel Royer's discussion A Visit!
"That's wonderful; you are very lucky."
19 hours ago
Sue Sedia replied to Jay's discussion I have no one left.
"I can only say I really relate to this on so many levels. I hope you new counselor will be more helpful."
21 hours ago
JO B replied to Sue Sedia's discussion 6 months later, I feel like it just happened.
"its finly hitin hom sue i wish i cud go 2 2011 wear my lig wz ok my dad wz aliv i flt saf i did nw im nervs wec u cud say very nervs wec cnt stp shakin on/off  i feal lk kid its cryin in seasid or parkc i cnt fnd my daddy its wot i feal lk lk…"
22 hours ago
Mel Royer posted a discussion

A Visit!

Like everyone on this site, I have been going through hell since my wife passed away, April 29th, 2015.  The past few weeks it has gotten worse until last night.  It was the middle of the night and, as usual, I was making numerous trips to the bathroom. Then for what amounts to 2 or 3 seconds, I saw directly ahead of me, standing at the bedroom door a vision. She was vivid to my eye and stood stock still. She appeared to be wearing the same type of hospital gown that she passed in. She said…See More
23 hours ago
Diane left a comment for Diane
"Its been 7 months since my mom died Shes always on my mind missing her. Im still sad at times. I know shes ok shes in heaven."
yesterday
Sue Sedia replied to Sue Sedia's discussion 6 months later, I feel like it just happened.
"I'm sorry you are having a hard time as well."
yesterday
Jean Dueno updated their profile
yesterday
Dee added a discussion to the group I miss my Mom!
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Lessons in the Aftermath of Mom"s Death

It's been about 15 months since my mom died after battling colon cancer that metastasized and spread quickly.Mom's courage and faith were extraordinary. She seemed to provide us with some final lessons about life and people in the final months of her life.I miss her so much - her optimism, love of family and her persevering spirit.Since her death, my family and I have to deal with some difficult things with my stepfather. He remarried within 8 months of her death and tried to manipulate us into…See More
yesterday
Dee joined Karen's group
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
yesterday
Jill E commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"I am a total wreck! Got the box of stuff from my b***ch of a daughter-in-law. Sent me over the edge. I don't know what to do anymore. I want to wrap myself in his clothes-I want to put them away somewhere safe. I see them I cry uncontrollably.…"
yesterday
Jesse's Mom commented on Jesse's Mom's group Signs from Our Loved Ones
"Cato, I noticed your comment today. I am not on as much but wanted you to I read your note. I am sorry for the loss of your husband. JO B,, How wonderful you received the gift of a dream. They are treasures indeed."
yesterday

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