Shane B Crone
  • Male
  • Beverly Hills, CA
  • United States
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Roy Edward Hunt left a comment for Shane B Crone
"Shane...My heart feels your pain, the same pain that I feel over the loss of my beautiful partner, Brad, who was only 35 years old. You and Christian should have had many wonderful years together and now you are suffering this traumatic loss at such…"
Sep 5, 2011
Sue Waxman replied to Shane B Crone's discussion The love of my life just fell off of a four story building and landed on a cement patio. Will I ever see him again? in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Dear Shane, I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved partner. The way his family has treated you is beyond ugly. What disrespect they show to you the person he loved. A lot of us have experienced the same garbage with our own families. Shane...I…"
Jul 31, 2011
Shane B Crone updated their profile photo
Jul 30, 2011
Shane B Crone joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
Jul 30, 2011
Shane B Crone is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 30, 2011

Profile Information

About Me:
I am a publicist and I live in Los Angeles.
About my Loss:
My partner fell off a four story building. He was taking photographs of one of our friends on her roof. We have been on her roof over a hundred times. He was taking some photos and stepped backwards and lost his balance and fell. There isn't a railing on the roof because it wasn't designed for people to be up there. He landed on a cement patio below.

I wasn't there. I found out that it took over 30 minutes for an ambulance to get there and when they finally arrived they didn't even run over to him. They asked my friend if she had his ID's. My friend yelled at them to help him. So eventually they took him to the ER.

When I got to the emergency room no one would tell me what was happening. Eventually a nurse told me that they had everyone working on him. After an hour a doctor came in and told me they couldn't save him.

A few hours after he passed it brought us to Sunday, which was Mother's day. There were so many things that happened while his mother was her....but in a nutshell she didn't do one that my partner would've wanted and she was only concerned about bank accounts and life insurance policies. While my family stayed in hotels and had to rent cars, his mom forced herself into my home. She tried to take everything and eventually she went to a hotel and I never heard from her again. I flew to Chicago to go to the funeral because she was having his body flown so he could be buried back home (Which he no longer considered his home) and I got a phone call from my partner's aunt telling me that his parents will physically hurt me if I try to show up to the funeral. I wasn't able to attend his funeral. I didn't get to see the burial.

There were so many other things that took place but the most important thing is I lost the love of my life, the one person who truly got me. We lived together and worked together. We literally spent almost 24 hours a day together for over seven years. I can't do one thing without it being a part of my life I shared with him. I run our company alone now and for the most part I still don't feel like he is gone. I mean I know he's no longer here but it feels like I can just call him or text him.

It's hard to relate to anyone. Most people don't know what to say and they give advice when they don't know what the hell they are talking about. I mean I didn't get to say goodbye and I don't want to say losing a mother to cancer is not as bad as a tragic death for a young person because you had time to say goodbye.

All I know is I hope to see him again someday...and the idea of not seeing him again makes me question life. What's the point of life? Why does stuff like this have to happen?

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At 12:58pm on September 5, 2011, Roy Edward Hunt said…
Shane...My heart feels your pain, the same pain that I feel over the loss of my beautiful partner, Brad, who was only 35 years old. You and Christian should have had many wonderful years together and now you are suffering this traumatic loss at such a young age. But your youth is a benefit - you will move on with your life when you're ready. I'm not so sure about myself. I am not a religious person, but I do believe that God = love = energy and energy can't be destroyed. That energy (soul if you will) exists outside the body (contrary to Christian beliefs) and so the attachment we have to the other people in our lives is never lost. I feel Brad's energy around me all the time and I often connect most strongly with it in my dreams.  A friend of mine created a small, Buddhist-like shrine on the lanai where Brad lost his life in our pool.  Just a bouquet of flowers, a candle, and a few personal items that had meaning for the two of us. I can't tell you how much peace that shrine brought to me those first few days after his death. The shrine is gone now, but I still feel his presence whenever I go out to the lanai. I am gearing myself up for a memorial service on 9/17, when our friends will get together and tell Brad stories and talk about the influence he had on our lives. Then we'll float his ashes out to sea in a rice paper "boat." It might help if you and your friends have a similar service and though you won't have his ashes, perhaps a nice picture of him (you have so many) would be a substitute. I think that all of these little memorials are very helpful in the grieving process. But the most important thing to remember is that it's only his physical body that is separated from you. If you calmly reflect on all the wonderful moments you two shared, I think you'll feel his presence surrounding you like loving arms. At least that is my experience. Know that you are not alone - we all share your loss, as you share ours.
 
 
 

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Profile IconRobin, Angel, Barbara York and 43 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
9 minutes ago
Carol Peckham Taylor commented on Diana Y's blog post After Death Communication
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16 minutes ago
Carol Peckham Taylor posted a status
"Memorial Day 2016. Remember Mom and Dad."
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Julie M left a comment for Lisa Green
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stewart p replied to Deborah Bailey's discussion Can any one help in the group Lost My Spouse...
"time spent on thinking about would of, should of or could of is time wasted indeed though i did it for a while myself until I read somewhere on one of these forums a host who addressed the should of, would of could of.  The thing he said and I…"
yesterday
rachel_m posted a video

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yesterday
Jan replied to Deborah Bailey's discussion Can any one help in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Brilliant, thank you!"
yesterday
Jan joined Jon-Paul Ackerman's group
yesterday
Tildyc commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"As always Bluebird- I am in complete agreement with you. Life is such a collassal burden now. I am not as active on here as I once was- I suppose my reason is that nothing has and never will change for me. He will never come back. I am alone in…"
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I still hope that my husband's death will kill me, even if only indirectly. His death has made me not take care of myself (I eat poorly and first lost weight, then gained a lot of weight, I don't exercise at all, I don't sleep…"
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JO B commented on David H's blog post 35 years
"cats is grt david thy r thy dnt hav a go it us we we morn loss we v had or multi loss in my cas u cud say  "
yesterday
stewart p commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"2 weeks until 36 months and from what I have discovered so far is first off, the experience alone will not kill you, it is a dreaded, only and horrible experience no doubt but some who exclaim "how can i live', well you just do.  One…"
yesterday
nicole irving commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi all, i havent been on site for a fair while too busy working ridiculous hours and trying to get myself together, sadly i notice we have new members and as much as i would like to say welcome, i am so sorry that your life has taken a turn that has…"
yesterday
joanne commented on joanne's blog post not today cake not today
"I'm sorry for your loss too Mia, big hugs to you xx"
Saturday
JO B replied to JO B's discussion mad at god
"wot did i do so bad i ye;;; "
Saturday
O.L. Cato commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Trina, I appreciate your words.  Thank you.  I know people are trying to be kind but this is different than any experience/grief I have ever known.  I have been working like a dog keeping the yard the way he liked it and it gives me…"
Saturday
Alex wilson posted a status
"Six months today. Why is the calendar my fiercest enemy. It's gotta get better someday, right"
Saturday
Mia commented on joanne's blog post not today cake not today
"I'm so sorry for your loss Joanne and I don't blame you a bit for feeling that way. You might feel differently on your next birthday but if you don't , it's ok. My Mom always made my birthday cake and she's not here to do…"
Saturday

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