"...This new life is hell without my son. Once strong, loving and livng life to this awful place. Zombie type of living, going thru the motions with no emotions..."
RJ, I agree. I am sorry for the loss of your son, Larry...I lost my beloved son, Jesse in 2012 and an infant son, Taylor, in 1987.
It is one day at a time, some times one hour at a time for me. Somedays it seems better and some days I can hardly move. The images of the grief messages you posted are so very true. Thanks for sharing your son here.
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave me a message. The pain of losing my spouse I am sure doesn't compare the pain of losing a child. One of best friends gave birth to a sleeping baby. I cannot fathom the pain that you, she and others must feel. My heart truly breaks for your loss! Bless you and your family, as well.
Jeezsus- I'm so sorry RJ. Your boy looks so sweet and your picture of the 2 of you is so beautiful. This greif and pain is unbearable isn't it? I'm not sure how I'm getting through each day. I do have moments now that my brain is distracted but the pain is always right there. It's always there.....
Im sorry if I'm not uplifting and encouraging. I'm not that person. At least anymore. I used to be solid as a rock and so very happy and strong. Losing my Mark has erased that woman. She died with him. I do not like this person I've become nor do I want this life I have to live now. Everyday I'm becoming more and more exhausted by this burden of loss. All I can do is wait for the day that I take my own last breath. It most possibly will take many yrs. Until then- this is what I've got- this is my empty life. All I want is to be free and to be with him again. It's truly how I feel.
The one small thing I have is this place. This place where all of us broken, kindred souls can go for understanding and support. I hope you can find peace RJ. Take care.
Hi Rj - don't EVER feel any pressure to change the way you are grieving. It is an individual process that only you know what's best. I too am dreading the holidays - losing an only child is like losing a limb. I feel so empty.
I will be thinking of you and everyone else who must endure this horrible heartache - hugs to you always
Just wanted to check in to see how you're holding up. It's another holiday and we are probably all anticipating the inevitable gaps from the loss of our loved ones. Please know that you are not alone in your grief - in fact there are way too many of us who have lost a child; an only child. Its like I don't know what to do with my role as a mother. I can't give it away because it belongs to Michael, my son. I'm not willing to discard it because I'll always be Michael's mom, yet I sometimes feel like I have no opportunity to use it again. Such sadness and heartbreak... Oh well I guess all one can do is put one foot in front of the other and move. Take care - hugs to you
Yesterday was good. I had lunch with my sons girlfriend. It is bittersweet to see her. I miss her and love seeing her, but it reminds me of what will never be...marriage, grandchildren. I know she will eventually move on. That makes me sad too. I had a horrible dream last night about missing my son. I was crying and crying. Today I feel awful. Can't get out of bed. Oh, when will we feel better. How long will our bodies be able to tolerate this awful pain?
Hi Rj - I'm so so sorry to hear about the loss of your only child. I too lost my only child in June of 2014. The loss is so monumental yet somehow you will manage to breathe, walk and perhaps even move forward. I don't know how i've made it thus far - I just have. He looks like a happy go lucky type of young man. My son Michael was 31 and both he and his girlfriend died from an accidental overdose. I cry everyday at some point and just recently I was able to put up a recent picture of him. I have a great resource for you - it's an organization for those parents who lost an only child. Its called Alivealone.org. Let me know what you think. Hugs and more hugs to you
Ronda, I am so so so sorry . I lost my only child too , who was 27 in a road accident. I know this pain all too well and I know how you feel and the terrible knowledge that while we live on , our world has shattered and changed. What a handsome boy Ronda, and I pray that you get the strength needed now. We are all here for you. Please do message or write whatever you feel like as it helps to be understood and no other who has not suffered this terrible nightmare can even begin to understand. Love to you.
I am so sorry about the loss of your beloved son. I just lost mine February 8, 2015. He was 24. I know the pain you are feeling. It's the worst suffering imaginable. Knowing that I have to spend the rest of my life without my son is unbearable. Please be gentle with yourself. You have suffered great trauma. I've been going to therapy and group meetings. Not sure if it will help, but I figure it couldn't hurt. Please feel free to message me. Take care.
When a heart breaks, you’re left gasping for air. After a while you seem fine, yet fall apart unexpectedly at random moments, sanity seemingly forsaken. There’s a saying that when a heart breaks, it cracks to allow golden love to shine through onto others. Do you see the value in going through this?It may not feel like it now, but grief is an honor. It is an honor to feel that much, to have loved that much. It teaches you compassion, gratitude, resilience, and the importance of grabbing life by…See More
This is a very early response to your email I know, but my sister is arriving today for 2 or 3 days. I have to admit to being nervous. First time having someone stay since I lost Pete. Plus, she will be sleeping in the bed he…"