RatherNotSay
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  • Houston, TX
  • United States
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Not really feeling anything

My family is made up of my mom, my 2 sisters, 1 adopted sister (who lives elsewhere), 2 kid brothers, B (a family friend who is more like a grandfather), my significant other, and Mike ( B's son, who…Continue

Started Sep 7

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RatherNotSay posted a discussion

Not really feeling anything

My family is made up of my mom, my 2 sisters, 1 adopted sister (who lives elsewhere), 2 kid brothers, B (a family friend who is more like a grandfather), my significant other, and Mike ( B's son, who also dated my mom). A couple months ago, a week before Mike's 40th birthday, he collapsed suddenly and started saying he was in pain and wanted to go to the hospital. (For Mike this is a big deal because he always refuses to go to the doctor ever since he had and got over cancer a few years ago.) I…See More
Sep 7
RatherNotSay is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Sep 7

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About my Loss:
My family is large. Its my mom, me, my two brothers, two sisters, and adopted sister,an old family friend who is basically more like a grandpa to me, my significant other, and the family friends son, who is also an old family friend who also dated my mom and they still really cared about each other and were talking about being together forever. The son's name was Mike. Exactly a week before his 40th birthday he suddenly collapsed. I was at work at the time. My family called an ambulance but the ambulance driver told him it was a pinched nerve probably causing his extreme pain. The ambulance driver wouldn't take him to the hospital, only offered to load him into his vehicle for my family to take him. Mike was always stubborn about going to the doctor after he had cancer, and after the ambulance drive left he just refused to go. About six hours later, he collapsed again and was crying in pain. (I had just gotten home.) When I saw how he was deteriorating, I told my family we had to force him to go. We struggled to get him in the car (my sisters, my significant other and I, because my brothers are only 9 and 10 and my mom and B (the family friend)both have old injuries that prevent them from heavy lifting. Mike was at the first hospital for a few hours and we waited while they did surgery. Turns out he had a torn aorta. They took him by helicopter to another hospital where they had better ability to do the surgery. We followed (my mom, B, and I) and we met his brother in law and niece at the hospital. He was in surgery for hours and then they came out and said that sadly the surgery (which they told us had a less than 1% chance of be successful)was successful but they declared him brain dead. They let us say goodbye and then they took him off the machines.

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Profile IconMarion Mcglashon, Bandar killa and Emily joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
2 hours ago
Robin H left a comment for Robin H
"Hey There People, most of the comments look kinda old here... Are they?"
7 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia, losing your mom is hard enough. When you also lived with her that takes it to a whole different level because you didn't experience the natural separation that other adults do. That's sure what happened to me. I lived with my mom and…"
yesterday
Profile IconCorinne C. Rico, Rita A M, Marisa L Galeoti and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Louise Grady updated their profile
yesterday
Lia Lynch commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you everyone. My mom had refused to see doctors for seven years; she feel ill, finally went, was diagnosed with Stage IV metastasized cancer in her throat, lung, and liver, went directly to hospice, and died less than 4 weeks from the initial…"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Lia,  So sorry for your loss.  Similar to others, I can understand your pain. I wish comfort to you but I know it is not easy. Please take your time.  All people, I was travelling so could not post for long. This is to tell that I…"
yesterday
Geri commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Everyone, This Friday 21st September will be our 27th wedding anniversary. It is my first without my husband and I've noticed my anxiety peaking and I'm back to waking every hour. Has anyone got any advice of how to cope with all the…"
yesterday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Thank you Layla Richards. I was very religious before my husband died, Then after his death I started searching why we have to go thru such pains and was looking into everything. Then after reading the Bible, the Torah, the Koran and more religious…"
Monday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Pamela, So sorry about the lost of your Husband, it has been 5 years and to be truthful things are not any better. We were very close, he was my rock, now I am nothing."
Sunday
Suzy Tatz commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I am new to this. I lost my dad June 7 2018 to lung cancer and my fiancé on Aug. 6. 2018 to colon cancer. I was caretaker to both and now I can’t stand being in my own skin. I have the panic feelings when I am alone. So I have been self…"
Sunday
Suzy Tatz joined Katherine Ellis's group
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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
Sunday
Layla Richards replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"That is some great advice Ofir Rifo. Also, bluebird, something that helped me a lot was reading through the thousands of stories contributed by individuals who had a near-death experience or received an after death communication from a passed loved…"
Sunday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"ANA BECOAH BY ovadia chamama. Miracle prayer even for those who do not believe in anything. It will act as a password and will open the universe who will answer your petition. Please bluebird just try the same way a tried and it worked. Remember you…"
Sunday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia I am so sorry for your loss. Bluebell"
Sunday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Bluebird please go to you tube in listen to a song called Ana Becoh by Ovadiada Chamama. This song will act as a password to the universe. You do not need to believe in any religion but It worked for me and I am an agnostic. I lost my husband 21…"
Sunday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Hello Bluebird. I always remember you and wonder how you are doing since the last time I wrote to you for the first time when I found this blog. It has been a while and I was hoping by this time you were doing better. Please understand that you will…"
Sunday
Profile IconSuzy Tatz, Kat, Candice and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Sunday
Layla Richards replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"So sorry to hear. My heart absolutely breaks for you. I know that you've mentioned suicide many times on here, and I just wanted to let you know that I actually did attempt about 10 months after my fiancé died. Life had literally become…"
Sunday
Lia Lynch posted a blog post

Three days ago, my mom died.  She was alone when she died -- or, at least, she had no family member present. I'd been to the hospice the morning before, and she'd told me, "I'm going to die soon."  A…

Three days ago, my mom died.  She was alone when she died -- or, at least, she had no family member present. I'd been to the hospice the morning before, and she'd told me, "I'm going to die soon."  All I could do was cry, and tell her I was going to miss her.  She told me to stop. I decided to take my leave from work as soon as I could, told her I was going into work to do that.  And I did.  But she did not wait for me.  She died the next morning, and I did not make it there in time.My mother…See More
Sunday

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