Paul
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Paul's Page

Latest Activity

Paul commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"29 years ago tonight I met a beautiful, young lady who would eventually be my wife and mother of our two sons.  That beautiful lady was cruelly taken from me this past year by the ruthless monster called cancer.  Kathy, I love you, I miss…"
Dec 31, 2017
Paul left a comment for Edward L
"Edward L You are correct. If you pay attention, the subtle signs from loved ones do appear."
Dec 31, 2017
Paul left a comment for Debbie brisky
"Debbie brisky, First of all, I wish to offer my deepest condolences on the loss of your husband. I lost my wife of over 26 1/2 years to breast cancer exactly 9 months today. As crazy as it sounds, what you are going through right now physically and…"
Dec 31, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Alice, You should not feel at all guilty for expressing your true feelings. You, I and the others here have been cruelly and unwillingly put in this, our worst nightmares come true, without any foolproof way to cope with it."
Dec 30, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"morgan and JenShep, Both of your comments really hit home with me. There is seemingly no way out of this relentless hell."
Dec 28, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, As hard as it is for the rest of us to endure the upcoming holidays it must be at least doubly difficult for you given the circumstances your husband and you were dealt with.  To everyone here who has put up with this hell for multiple…"
Dec 14, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Count me among those who are looking forward to death after losing my wife. I am absolutely not interested in anything else."
Dec 13, 2017
Paul replied to Linda Engberg's discussion Holidays Again
"Linda, I wish I could sleep thru these holidays as well. Then forever after that........"
Nov 22, 2017
Paul commented on Niomi Johnson's blog post Today would have been my husband’s birthday.
"Hello Niomi, I wish to extend my deepest sympathies on the loss of your spouse under what must be the most heart breaking circumstances imaginable. I lost my wife on March 31 of this year after a six year battle with breast cancer. I can relate to…"
Nov 9, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"bluebird, As bad as I feel now, I do not look forward to the holidays as this will be the first holiday season without my beloved wife. We also met on a New Year's Eve and I am really dreading that day. I can't see myself lasting years on…"
Oct 15, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"This seems to be an especially hard time for a lot of us lately. I feel exactly the same way as the previous 4 posters."
Oct 15, 2017
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Nancy, I believe the poem/song is on the comment wall and was submitted by stewart p on October 6 at 11:53 am"
Oct 12, 2017
Paul commented on Joy's blog post Grief Share Support Group
"Joy, Good luck with the group sessions. I hope that it goes a long way in easing your pain."
Oct 12, 2017
Paul and Michaela waldier are now friends
Oct 8, 2017
Paul left a comment for Bryan Kelly Reeves
"Michaela, you tell them that unless they have been through it themselves they should "F" off. Especially what you had to witness. My heart goes out to you."
Oct 8, 2017

Profile Information

About Me:
54 years old, devastated and heartbroken.
About my Loss:
Lost Kathy, my beautiful wife of over 26 and a half years to metastatic breast cancer after 6 years of courageously fighting this dreadful disease on March 31, 2017. She was my everything and I have just about given up my will to live after losing the love of my life.
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Comment Wall (1 comment)

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At 5:00pm on October 2, 2017, Joy said…

Paul, I'm very sorry that you lost your wife, Kathy and the tremendous void her passing has left you with. I'm sending my prayers up for you and your family too! I hope you've found some comfort from the site. We all know what it is to lose someone we love dearly, so we all share a bond that way.

Thanks for responding to my post. It is very tragic what's happening. The only consolation I find in all of our losses is that our loved ones don't have to deal with any of the crap happening here in this world anymore. That doesn't help those of us left behind because we're still here dealing with it every day.

 
 
 

Groups

Latest Activity

morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I am finding it so hard to keep motivated.  I have tons I need to do to keep afloat and try to honor the legacy of my husband and yet all I seem able to do is push myself, force myself.......constantly. Its the putting on the mask and…"
5 hours ago
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I'm now having sleeping problems lately.  Go figure.  I sent you a message Monty. Comforting to see all the posting here.  But, scary to see all the 5,6,7 years since....  God have mercy."
19 hours ago
Profile IconMichelle and Amanda joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
20 hours ago
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"When your ‘life force’ is taken away from you there is no will to go on.  It will be 5 years for me soon and many people think my grief has subsided as I seem to be functioning better, but as I said earlier we just become more adept…"
yesterday
dream moon JO B commented on M Adams's blog post Who copes best with loss? Men or women?
"do not no wen dad died i loss my way for long tim u cud  say i did im f i am'thn loss folerd evn my cat i had for 16 yrs in 2016 wish she got me thru few dark tims she did  thn i gon to spirtaslt churchh  fond upliftmtn i di did…"
yesterday
Billy Jo Colt commented on M Adams's blog post Bad behaviour
"Thank you for such a wonderful, in depth and reflective post. It sounds like your Mom really had the devotion and love she richly deserved from you. As you said. The Doctors could have done a lot more. It was if they didn't want involved unless…"
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Friend's, Big Deal, It's St. Patrick's Day. All is does to me is relieve my Husband's death. In 2013 he passed away 2 months after St. Patrick's Day. We did go out to dinner together put he was in so much pain we had…"
yesterday
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello friends, I’m so grateful to read your honesty about this hell on earth, this unbearable grief that we have (almost) no choice but to bear. I’m sorry I don’t contribute more often. When I think of something to write, in my…"
Sunday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Have been reading comments from the past few days.   Yes, grief is lonely.   I'm so thankful for this group.  Like Joe says, it's really difficult not having our better half here physically, just to appreciate…"
Sunday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Marita, Yes, we all pretty much have found that grief is not a bump on the head.  It is a ripping apart of a quantum soul.  For me it has become an all encompassing desire to plead with the universe to take me.  I do it as I have now…"
Sunday
Melissa is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Saturday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, Same as you if I am not posting anymore God has finally taken me. It will be a joyous day."
Saturday
M Adams left a comment for Sue Toler
"So sorry you’re going through such a grievous loss — my mother died recently as well, we were very close and I had been there helping her because she was having increasingly complex health problems over the last five years, so I feel…"
Friday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"That you all for your kind compassion.  Just plain hell today as usual.  Tears at times and don't know when or what will trigger them.  The only time I venture out is my daily visit to the cemetery (closest I can be to Her…"
Friday
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, My heart ached for you when I read of your breakdown day.  We feel your intense pain and heartache.  Over time we become so adept at carrying our grief, stuffing it and hiding it.  Yet so many times we become so overwhelmed by…"
Friday
Sue Toler updated their profile
Friday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, So sorry to hear about your day. My doctor was the same way with me when I had a breakdown, he could have cared less. Thank God for our friends here who truly understand."
Friday
dream moon JO B commented on dream moon JO B's video
Thumbnail

Be thou my vision - (with lyrics)

"dont no why but it  it so sothin relzinin i do"
Friday
dream moon JO B posted a video
Friday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, So sorry to hear that you are having an extraordinarily bad day... This is the life for us after we are left here in this world without the love of our life beside us."
Thursday

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