• Female
  • Grover, MO
  • United States
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  • Joy
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About Me:
About my Loss:
20 year old daughter killed in motorcycle accident because of impaired driver

Comment Wall (4 comments)

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At 2:49pm on September 9, 2017, Patty said…

Joy, thank you for your message.  I'm sorry for your loss as well.  It's been 7 years since my daughter's accident and I find I don't really feel better.  Caitlin is my only child.  We spent so much time together and were so much alike.  We were kindred spirits like you and your mom.  At 4 months your grief is still very raw I'm sure.  This is a very difficult road to travel.  I still just want to go to be with her.  I'm sure you understand.  Thank you again for your message.  Remember you will see your mom again.

At 7:17pm on September 7, 2017, Joy said…

Patty, I've not yet corresponded with you, but I wanted to write and say how sorry I am about you losing your daughter Caitlin. As someone who lost her mom not yet 4 months ago, I feel tremendous grief. I've read some of your posts and the relationship and closeness you shared with your daughter, reminds me of how I was with my mom, so I feel like I can relate to you in that way.

I felt that my mom and I were kindred spirits. I also understand why you want to join your daughter. You are not alone in that feeling, as mostly everyone's posts that I've read on this site has said how they want to join their loved ones.

Anyway, I just wanted to drop you a note to express my sincere sympathies.

At 1:03am on August 10, 2016, Christine Askkins said…
Dearest Patty,believe it or not, I have little moments in time everyday when I don't feel the overwhelming grief, I like to think of them as little gifts from my Joe,he and God know how overtaxed my mind is with all the sad and unbearable thoughts I have about my sons passing,I can fill an entire day with thinking about,"if onlys",too numerous to mention now, but dearest Patty, I'm sure you've had and STILL have days like that.what we can TRY to do is,if it had been us, if we went first, would we want our sweet children to miss us,of course we would, would we want them to cry out our names, praying for us to come back to them ?Absolutely!! And cry for the loss of us, the times we would never have together on this earth anymore,yes, oh yes,but would we also want them to have joy, Peace, and the confidence in KNOWING that we will be together again, this time FOREVER, never to be parted again, AND in the most beautiful place to spend Eternity, please Patty let these thoughts be in your mind also when you think of your other precious half , knowing that this is exactly what she would want for you, you know that's true ,please try and give yourself gift of peaceful,loving thoughts of your daughter, and feel her arms around you giving you comfort which I'm sure she's been trying to do , let yourself feel her love and her comfort, that she is I am VERY sure has been trying to give to you and make you feel,be open to it, it will come, this is what she can do for you , while you have to still exist here, until you can once again hold each other , that time will be forever, Peace And may Gods love Along with you're precious daughters as well , help you to feel ,calm, safe, and cared for very deeply,Goodnight my friend,Chris

Sent from my iPhone

On Aug 8, 2016, at 11:15 PM, Online Grief Support - A Social Community wrote:

Patty added a comment to your profile on Online Grief Support - A Social Community

Christine, thank you for your kind words. I'm sorry that you have to endure the loss of your Joe. No nothing can be said. I can't believe I'm still here after 6 years. How can I be living with half my heart and half my soul? I needed to hear what you said "nobody feels this terrible loss like we do , don't even try to explain it, it can't rationally be explained". I think sometimes I do try to explain myself. I don't know why I do that. I think it's because I feel so alone in my pain. Caitlin and I were always like 2 halves of a whole. I'm just incredibly lonely without her here. And I can't believe someone can live with being this sad and devastated all the time. How can that be? I just really want to go home and be with her. I don't like the person I've become and I hate my life. No parent should have to endure this. I don't think I'll ever have peace. Thank you so much for your care and concern. ~ Patty

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At 1:13pm on August 8, 2016, Christine Askkins said…
Oh my sister in sorrow,my heart is broken a little more,this time for you and your precious daughter,nothing can be said so just know we are united in our pain,no sense can be made of ANY of this,we can't go on, and yet somehow we keep reawakening every day to this more than devastating reality,everything it seems is totally out of our control,especially our emotions,don't let ANYBODY tell you how you are to handle this, how you SHOULD be feeling "by now",or how to "get on with your life". I know for me , a real part of my very being died when my son Joe passed away,that's NEVER coming back, we have been altered in a way that can never be undone,so please know my sincere thoughts and prayers are with you, nobody feels this terrible loss like we do , don't even try to explain it, it can't rationally be explained, I still can't fathom what happened to our lives when my son died,it will be 5 years for me, no closer to the real Peace I need to go on,I'll be praying for peace for us both, dear,sincerely,Christine Askins, I'm new here, if you need to talk, feel free to call me, I don't know if that's allowed,732-801-3115

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