Michelle
  • Female
  • Alberta
  • Canada
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  • Lisa Maria DeMatto- Wysong
  • Elynn m

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annjulie replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"I lost my mom to suicide and my boyfriend was killed by the police. He died of cardiac arrest at age 31 after being tasered 3 times. It gives me pain to think of the tragic ways that they died, how they suffered and what they thought before death.…"
Dec 27, 2016
Michelle replied to Linda Engberg's discussion Can't handle the Holidays in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Me to, but I drink vodka now, as my husband an I use to drink beer together. I'm struggling an hurting so badly. The pain hasn't got better, what a lie. This is my 1st Xmas without my soulmate,the only time I sleep is if I drink. The…"
Dec 16, 2016
Michelle replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"With reality setting in the pain has gotten worse for me, knowing he won't be here Xmas, missing our kids grow up, all our dreams r gone. I'm so overwhelmed in grief my heart hurts. Nothing has gotten better for me, I miss him so much it…"
Dec 8, 2016
kim r replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"My husband passed away a little over a week ago from cardiac arrest.  I have dreams of when I found him and how hard I tried to revive him.  The autopsy and funeral home were not as bad for me--the image of him struggling for life while I…"
Dec 6, 2016
Michelle replied to Linda Engberg's discussion I AM STILL MARRIED AND AM REFUSE TO BE A WIDOW. in the group Lost My Spouse...
"A week after my husband of 16y  passed, I was told I'm still young an can get married an find love again.. No, never, I'm not going to fake it with someone who will never compare to my soulmate. I will be married to my husband an…"
Nov 23, 2016
Michelle is now friends with Lisa Maria DeMatto- Wysong and Elynn m
Nov 23, 2016
Lisa Maria DeMatto- Wysong replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Michelle, It is a awful thing that you and your children are going through. You cannot blame yourself, I blamed myself for a long time and still do at times. I should have went to see him soon, I had called and left messages but he never called back…"
Nov 23, 2016
S.a.m. replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"I'm so sorry Michelle. I lost the love of my life at 41 to a murder (we were together for 20 years)...I was there for the police response and know enough about what happened to be able to picture it in my head.  I have had bad dreams…"
Nov 23, 2016
Michelle replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Thank u, I'm sorry for you're loss. I was told the same, I've been made to see a psychologist. It is also so hard to know after the autopsy, they kept his heart, brain an eyes. I'm to get them back once the final autopsy…"
Nov 23, 2016
Michelle replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Thank u, an sorry for your loss. "
Nov 23, 2016
ShingingLight1967 replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Michelle, I am so sorry for your loss. My husband too, passed from a heart attack almost a year ago.  One minute we were texting about a Christmas get away we were going to take, the next I am getting phone calls from various people and finally…"
Nov 22, 2016
Lisa Maria DeMatto- Wysong replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Hi Michelle, I too have nightmares, and when I'm going throughout my day sometimes I get flashbacks. I used to be afraid of everything, like i was just waiting for something terrible to happen. I felt lost, numb and incomplete. On Dec 18 2015,…"
Nov 22, 2016
A. Buyten replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Hi, I hope that your dreams get better. I lost my sweetheart in 2011. My dreams mostly of her are of her visiting me, but then I wake up in joy that I get to be with her. Then I wake and realize she has passed away. It is difficult to deal…"
Nov 22, 2016
Ruthie replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"So sorry.  I think the sudden tramatic loss is very tough and young too.  My husband was 51.  I had pictures of hunting accident I had to review with investigators surrounding questions of his death.  Still I have to give them to…"
Nov 22, 2016
Louise replied to Michelle's discussion When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Michelle, I am so very sorry for your loss; how very awful for you and your children. I too lost my soulmate suddenly 55 days ago to suicide. I knew he suffered with depression but he never let on how bad he actually was so it was a huge shock. He…"
Nov 22, 2016
Michelle added a discussion to the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
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When my soulmate died he took my heart an soul with him. I'm so brokenl

My husband passed away last month in his sleep at age 41 from a heart attack. He had no signs or symptoms leading up to his death. We were together for almost 16 years an have 7 kids. I have bad dreams an nightmares of finding him or of him in the middle of his autopsy, or at the funeral, I can't get out of my head how cold he was an the Smell of formaldehydes. Has anyone else had these bad images in there head, that take over the good memories. I feel so lost an alone without him.See More
Nov 22, 2016

Profile Information

About Me:
I'm a mom an nurse, I've been married to my soulmate for 16 years, we have 7 kids.
About my Loss:
My husband is a paramedic an just turned 41 an died in his sleep from a heart attack last month. I found him an started CPR, until his coworkers arrived, EMS worked on him for a hour but were unable to bring him back. When he left he took my heart an soul with him, I'm a broken, I miss him so much

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Latest Activity

Alice Thompson commented on Pamela philipp's blog post Empty
"Good luck, Pamela :-) It is so hard to live among others when your inner life is so different from theirs. I think that after the first year I gave up expecting anyone to understand what is really going on for me. Sometimes I tell them anyway, but…"
5 hours ago
Teresa D. commented on Karen's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Karen, you saying your not helpful is very untrue.  I hate to say it but those ahead of me let me know I'm okay.  Those ahead keep me from feeling disappointed or like something is wrong with me because I'm not "moving…"
9 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I try to do that as well, Bluebell. I always want to be a son who makes my mom proud. I wish that I could somehow know that mom is still aware of me somehow. That she knows how much I miss her and love her. I just don't know if she does.…"
11 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am not there yet either Brett.It is so hard to be without her. But I keep putting one foot in front of the other, not to move away from her, but instead to live up to what I think she wanted me to be. Bluebell"
12 hours ago
Pamela philipp posted a blog post

Empty

It's been 2 years since I lost my mother and my husband and I am still lost and still very much alone in my grief I haven't been on this site in a while I've been trying to get by every day it's not working too well I'm struggling really really hard my family is still not around I guess they think I am OK that I'm doing fine little do theyknow that I'm not they are coming to my house this Saturday for a cook out because it's something my mother wanted me to do that's the only reason I agreed to…See More
13 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"For sure my mom will always be a part of us. But there may come a day when I don't remember her voice or mannerisms as clearly as I do now. There may be a day that I have to look at a picture to remember exactly what she looked like. All of…"
23 hours ago
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Exactly Bruce and M. Nothing is the same"
yesterday
Bruce Armstrong commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Take a trip would be great if you had that very special person to share it with-people just don't understand how much it takes away from you as a person"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"This take a trip advice must be widespread -- I was so stunned to get repeated phone calls and letters from one aunt telling me to go on a cruise within a month of my husband's death. I guess my non response is why there were both letters and…"
yesterday
John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Bruce, it's just overwhelming at times.  This month is our anniversary, the anniversary of our first date (the most significant date to her), and the 3rd year since I lost her.  I have no one to talk to about any of this because my…"
yesterday
Bruce Armstrong commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"So lonely in the evening house is empty nobody here -been 3 months after 54 years with her I miss her and can't seem to stop crying need that companion and love close"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett I think they will always be a part of us."
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, right now my mom is so incredibly fresh in my mind. I do fear that the day will come when that is no longer the case. I don't want my memories to fade away. That is one of the issues that I have with, "letting go.""
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett you said it perfectly"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is true that being anxious will not help anything. There are so many things in life that we just have no control over. This is certainly one of them. It's just so hard to stop having those feelings though. My stomach is tied in knots right…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, it will in time... I talked things through in my mind a lot and said to myself well I was anxious yesterday and the day before and it did not change anything, I did see my dr and took something for a few months and I am now weaning off of…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Prayers sent. God Bless you and give you strength and peace."
yesterday
Luisa Salter commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Today we moved everything out of Mom's apartment. It has uncovered a new layer of grief and I am utterly exhausted. My house and garage are in complete disarray with boxes everywhere. I feel so bogged down with things and things to to. I have…"
yesterday
Luisa Salter replied to Crystal K's discussion Its hard accepting my mother's death in the group I miss my Mom!
"Crystal I am so sorry. I lost my Mom on August 30th, and I understand this sense of coldness and feeling like a zombie. When people ask me how I am feeling, I tell them that I go back and forth between numb and devastated. It seems like I will cry…"
yesterday
Karen bentl posted a status
"Yes, I realize no one can actually hear me... I was just reaching out..."
Sunday

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