"Tomorrow will be one month since I lost my 2nd brother to a drug overdose. My youngest brother overdosed in Oct 2014. I keep pretending to all that I am okay, holding it together for my parents and my daughter but I am so far from okay. I am so…"
"I am so sorry for everyones loss. In 2009 I lost my 32 year old daughter to a heroin overdose. My path of grief recovery has been long and sad, if there is such a thing as recovery. My first year I was suicidal. Because I am a writer, I have…"
"Oh my gosh. I can relate. Except we didntt have kids. So sorry. We were divorced Also
But reconciled and just waiting for him to move back In. He had drinking issues in he past but looking back now drugs surfaced probably from that behavior. I…"
"I lost my ex on Feb 29th to an accidental overdose that was laced with fentanyl as well. We have 3
Kids. We were together 18 years and apart for four. During those four years we could barely talk to each other because he couldn't forgive me for…"
Sara's dad's girfriend called me and read off a list of songs they want to play during the memorial. All were good and I added Stairway to Heaven. I also wanted to make sure that Over the Rainbow by IZ was on there. I have played it so many times that I know it by heart. Her dad is doing the eulegy and giving those who want a chance to say something the time to do that. I want to speak but dont know how I will feel then. I hurt more than I thought I did. Thiss is so painful.
Hospice has been so helpful. Sara is now on Morphine and is finally in no pain. She is resting comfortabely and able to sleep. It is now just a matter of time as her organs have begun to start going into failure. The wait is tortuous. I think I have been blocking out the pain and I feel like I might crumble soon. I want to thank you for your support and comfort.
Thank you Laura. I am on an anti depressant and have anxiety pills that I only take when absolutly necessary. I too am not a religious person but I am a spirtual one. I send you my prayers, love, and light.
Hi Laura, I thank you for your concern and am sorry that it took so long to ger back to you. I am sorry for your pain as well. The meeting with Hospice went as well as could be expected. Sara's dad and stepmother were there as well as myself and my son. They are going to make it as comfortable as they can and have several people involved in her care. We were told that at this point her organs have begun to shut down but they give us no timeframe. I am grateful for Hospice as they are a wonderful organization. Sara too was so far into her addictions that no one could help her. When she had that final asthma attack her lungs were so tight that the medics could not get a tube down for oxygen to go in. We were told that the drugs that she took that night made it impossible for her to get through it as the drugs caused such as they depressed of body and the ability for her body to take the attack. When it happened she screamed for me and I went to her she was trying to breathe with her breathing machine and wasn't getting any air. She said I'm dying, I'm dying and and I had already called 911. Then she looked at me and told me she loved me and fell into my arms. The squad got there then and they couldn't revive her. They started chest compressions and kept it up all the way to the hospital which allowed a tiny bit of air into her lungs but she was basically without oxygen for over ten minutes. They still have her on a ventiator and a feeding tube. As far as brain activity, she is still in the coma and cannot get by without the vent and feeding tube. She can't see and probably can't hear. I know that hearing is the last sense to go but there is no sign of her hearing. Her organs are shutting down but I don't know how long it will take until she goes. I have be mourning since the day it happened and now I feel like I am stone. I have panic attacks all of the time. I don't know why I feel like it's not real. Everyone says I am so strong but I'm not. Thank you for listening to me and for being interested.
Hey Laura, you are welcome. I didn't write it but I found it on another site. When I first found it, I printed copies and handed them out to many people I knew.....especially the ones that kept asking me if I was "ok" or over my son yet!
Hi Laura, I'm off to meet with Hospice and I am scared. I know it will be okay but I am nervous. I do have a list of questions for them so I will know better as to what to expect. Just wanted to update you and I will let you know what happened later.
We have already had expert after expert and they all say that she just wouldn't be there. If they could strap her into a chair she would not be able to function, think, talk or do anything pertaining to any form of life. She is just a shell of her former self. She is wasting away as she is so thin and has lost so much weight. It has come down for me that I want to let her go mercifully. He dad struggles with this. He doesn't want her to have to go on like this but he has a hard time with finallity. He says, and he is right, that she would not want this. She was without oxygen for over ten minutes and just isn't there. She would never come back in any form. We will talk with Hospice tomorrow and I have a list of questions for them. I am sure this will help. I do know that if we took her off of the ventilator she would have to be moved to another facility as the nuring home she is in doesn't do that. But that's not really here nor there. You have quickly become a blessing to me.
Thank you Laura for your compassionate comment. No, there is no greater pain than losing a child. My daughter, Sara, has no chance of recovery at all. I have been grieving since this happened on Dec. 15, 2013. There is very little or no brain activity at all. Hospice is meeting with the family tomorrow to discuss our options. I am scared even thought I know what is best for Sara. I will be praying for you.
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Welcome to Online Grief Support - A Social Community
I just read your post from yesterday. You are SO right!! I have some clothing of my mom's tucked away that I am keeping. One piece is a shirt she used to wear in the 60's that I remember so clearly from when I was a little girl. I…"
"I'm so sorry, Theresa. It's too bad the lot of us don't live nearer together so we could meet and support one another. One thing I've learned through this is that there are people in our lives who can be thoughtless and…"
I can relate so well to this. I can't tell you how many times I have said and felt these exact same things. I'd see a recipe that looked good and start to call my mom to tell her about it, I'd create a piece of art but she…"
"I went out shopping with a friend today. When I saw a pretty wind chime, I found myself thinking "Mom would like that". But there is no more Mom to get presents for. I miss her. I want her back. I wish this was all a very long, horrible…"
"It really helps to communicate with others who have experienced the same loss, so thanks to all who answered my post. Lenny, Connie and Kim - we all understand each other. Today was a better day for me - some days are like that.…"
"Dear Connie, Katherine and Kim
I fully understand the bereft feelings and I also have been anxious about precious moments of our daughters and where they will end up when we pass. The pain of losing our only child never ends , even when we appear to…"
I feel the very same way. I have everything form my son's baby things, through elementary and high school. He died at age 17 and never got to even graduate, drive a car by himself, well you know....I have things of mine I wanted…"
"I too have regrets and your post deeply resonated with me. I wish I spent more time with him. I wished I laughed more with him. I wish I talked to him more. It's too late now.
I will never be the same. I am trying to help myself in little…"
I am forced to do all of these things as quick as I can because I have to go back to work soon. I am trying to finish all of the paperwork. I was forced to do things quickly even though I am so emotionally distraught. My world stopped when…"
I am so sad that your husband died a sudden death. My partner and I had a conversation about what's the worst thing that could happen to him. We talked about it for hours and we cried a lot that night. In a way we were saying…"
"Catherine, I to lost my only child my son in 2014. im not doing good, I pray to die everyday. theres no life with out my son for me. shawn is the love of my life. my depression is getting worse, my loneliness emptiness. im so very…"
"Heather, yes I do, I have no one, my husband doesn't even want to hear me talk about it, he ignores me when I do
I have not had a dream about her yet
To me it seems like everyone thinks I should just move on, but I'm not ready, I have…"
"I do the same thing, at least several times a day. My Mom was a diabetic so I had to take the used testing strips back to the pharmacy the other day. I actually sat In the car hugging it, something of hers that I have to let go of and it made me so…"
"I just had to say when I get in bed at night I have such a hard time - I cry mostly every night and I remember that every night when i used to talk to my mom on the phone when we were hanging up she would say love you...And I think to myself who…"
"I lost my only son, aged 28, in November 2014. On the surface I am doing well, and I am functioning on a day to day basis just fine. But every day it replays in my mind how the police came to my door to say Scott had 'passed…"