Judy Edwards
  • Female
  • Longview, TX
  • United States
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If only he'd come walking through the door .
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Yesterday we found my son cell phoneHe had on the night at the hospital. We didn't think it worked anymore so it's been put up and yesterday I found it we had a spare battery for it there were text…Continue

Started this discussion. Last reply by Davi Burford Jan 13, 2014.

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About Me:
I'm a 51 year old woman. On May the 1st, 2013, I lost my 32 year old son. His name was Matthew Edwards. We all live in East Texas. Me in Longview and my son in Gilmer. Matt was my only son. At age 29 he granted me with a grandson Matthew Jr. was born then, the next year Christopher Ray arrived in Dec 2010.

So I was left with two wonderful grand babies.
About my Loss:
Well it started in 2011 after a long bout of COPD with my father we last him that year and my grieving began. I was getting close to my normal
living when on April 31,2013, my sons girlfriends mother shows up at my home to tell me that somehow thru the sheriff office in Upshur county they found a emergency number for her as Matthew contact. She came to tell me he'd been care-flighted to Tyler in critical condition. I raced to get to the hospital.after they got into ICU and stable as they could get him. He had pneumonia, Hepatitis C,meth Hy-do- codeine and pot were also in his system. His temp had reach 110 degrees so as I am disable from a wreck in 1998. I raced back home to grab a few things so i could be at hospital with him till he got to come home..The hospital called me as I was on way home and told to return to the hospital Matthew had taken a turn for the worse. So to make a long story short we lost him at 12:40 pm the next day he never remain conscience. So my grieving began again this time it seem 100 times worse than my dad lose. I laid in bed for 3 weeks not moving from the bed except to use the restroom. It's 3 months later and I'm still in bad shape.

Our last hoilday together as a family!

These picture all were taken Easter Sunday 2013.  I never dream that in a little past a month my family would be tore apart forever.  My grand son are Matthew Jr. he will be 4 on November 18. 2013 and Christopher Ray will be 3 in December 22, 2013.  Then Christopher got a mean streak that starting to show it ugly head.  I think he's acting out from losing his daddy, them Matthew jr. seem every time he's with me anymore since his daddy passed he got a stomach ache everyday.  when I question there mom about Matthew Jr. stomach ache she told he has one everyday.  So I believe that even though they are still little they are acting out in there own ways.  So my family can use any help your group can give me.  My heart had a piece broke off on 1st of May and a part of my soul left when I lost Matthew senior.  Thank you for letting me have a place to vent and not be judged.  Thank again Judy Edwards 

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Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 9:15am on December 10, 2013, Lynn Williams said…

Judy I haven't seen your posts recently and just wanted to say i am thinking of you and wondering how you are holding up.  We sure do become an extended family on this site.  I am still going day by day and wonder how I can go on.  

Hugs Lynn

At 11:34am on August 19, 2013, Connie K said…

JUdy

 I am so sorry for your loss. I hope we can all be of help to each other here.Also you might want to see if there's a Compassionate friends group in your area, for people who have lost children and siblings.  Sending you prayers and hugs.

At 9:40am on August 19, 2013, Ammy said…

So sorry for your loss Judy.  We all know your pain.  Please post on the wall for Missing my Son or Daughter…  That is where most of the communication takes place.

I have been a member for almost 3 years and it saddens me each time I see a new name appear.  The road is hard, but you can do this.  Take it slow, and allow yourself to grieve as necessary.  You also need to take care of yourself.  

I know how hard it is with the grandchildren.  My son's daughter was just 21 months when she lost her Daddy and it was so very hard for her.  She still has days when she is saddened and stressed as I think she is forgetting and  she doesn't want to.  She will get out pictures to look at.  Sometimes it helps and sometimes it makes it worse.  They need to be able to grieve also and at their own pace.  Anger and nastiness can be a part of it.

Just some of what I have experienced by going through this.  Please feel free to write/say whatever you are feeling.  No one judges here.

Sending a cyber (((hug))) to you.  Wish it could be something to ease your pain, but I know it can't.  Again, I am so very sorry for you and your family.   

Judy Edwards's Blog

I couldn't get out of bed this weekend

Sept 1 st was my son 4 month passing day. I set curled in a ball all weekend

Not wanting to move are get out of bed this weekend seems I don't want to love at the first of each month now since I lost Matt on may 1st 13. I did get upset with his fiancée when she called me Sat. Night drunk telling me the guy we suspect either shot my Son

Up with the drug that kid him tripping our hat that nite I was totally up set because she forced our hand now we were gather as much info b4 going to… Continue

Posted on September 4, 2013 at 12:13am

I hope I haven't said are type something to step on the groups toes

Good afternoon to all of you.  I just wanted to say i pray I  haven't said anything that has step on anyone toes.  I'm new to your group and it is in no way I'm trying to offended anyone at all.  So if i have plesae let me know so I won't do it again  Thank you Judy Edwards  

Posted on September 3, 2013 at 4:02pm — 2 Comments

I'm so angry this morning but this time it's not at my son !!!!but

To the people whom have posted either blogs are message's to me, I am so grateful for your story's of your losses you put me in my place.  I found out how lucky We were to be there when Matthew passed I'm so new to your wonderful site I don't know where I am are were I'm supposed to be when I post. However I needed to read the post it set back to a place I needed to be y'all but my feet back on the ground

.Now what happen since I posted last that got me stirred up is my son fiancee,…

Continue

Posted on August 31, 2013 at 7:48am

Im hurting like Ive never hurt in in entire life!!!!!!

Today for the life of me I couldn't remember what we did to my son, so I called my partner, and ask him.  [Here a secret we found out when we had my son cremated, if you have a love one cremated at a Black Funeral Home the price is 795.00. after calling around 10 Funeral homes we got ahold of a black Funeral Home.  The men came right out and told us that the difference between White and Black funeral home, the other funeral homes we called that night wanted 2500.00 to 3000.00 dollars to…

Continue

Posted on August 30, 2013 at 4:48pm — 2 Comments

 
 
 

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