Christopher
  • Male
  • Blanchard, OK
  • United States
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Latest Activity

Frances Koonce left a comment for Christopher
"Dear Christopher,  I tried to send a short message and a request, but I don’t know if it actually got sent or not. I wanted to offer my condolences to you and your son.  I noticed that you are a person of faith. Would you care to…"
Aug 1
Christopher replied to Cristal's discussion Struggling in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Hi Cristal.Welcome to the hardest part of your life. This is the worst it will ever get, which is both bad and good at the same time. You're going to become a new woman after you make it through this journey.There are no short cuts. Take this…"
Aug 1
Christopher replied to Pamela philipp's discussion FAILING in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Where/how did they bury the manual for life? It has a symbol:$$$$$$"
Jul 23
Christopher replied to Pamela philipp's discussion FAILING in the group Lost My Spouse...
"I know all about the "I just can't." It's not because you don't want to... you try and it's just not there, like turning on a light switch and the bulb doesn't work. You did all you could and knew how to, but it…"
Jul 22
Christopher replied to Pamela philipp's discussion FAILING in the group Lost My Spouse...
"You had half your soul ripped out... basically. Of course you're going to struggle. Most folks just don't get that because they are still fine. They have not been so deeply wounded and have nothing to compare your struggle to. When I…"
Jul 22
Christopher joined Jon-Paul Ackerman's group
Jul 22
Christopher joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
Jul 22
Christopher replied to Betsy's discussion I am looking for people who have been widowed over two years to talk to
"I have a rollercoaster. Some days I am fine alone, others I simply need a wife to love on and make stuff for and ask her opinion. That's just how it is. I don't get a choice and folks who constantly tell me "get over it, it's…"
Jul 22
Christopher replied to Betsy's discussion I am looking for people who have been widowed over two years to talk to
"I have the same experience and have talked to others who experience likewise, so it's a general fact regardless of age or gender. That's just how it goes. We'll be here, off and on. Hopefully."
Jul 22
Christopher replied to Betsy's discussion I am looking for people who have been widowed over two years to talk to
"I have to look forward or I just want to lay down and die. My son needs a dad. He needs a mom too but I can't find a woman who will step up and do that for him. She died when he was 5 so he didn't know her well. He has not had a mom since…"
Jul 22
Christopher replied to Betsy's discussion I am looking for people who have been widowed over two years to talk to
"Make something new. Marvel at it.Do it again. Repeat as necessary. It helps."
Jul 22
Christopher replied to Betsy's discussion I am looking for people who have been widowed over two years to talk to
"Just got here. Widowed at age 28. It took 18 hours from healthy wife to no more wife. That was nearly 8 years ago. She wanted me to move on and I wanted the same for her if I went first... strange that we had the conversation mere months before her…"
Jul 22
Christopher posted a status
"Need a wife, preferably one that has a place and isn't a workaholic. It's time to start again. No more loneliness."
Jul 22
Christopher commented on Amy's group You're too young to be a widow
"Some days you try, but you just can't. Whatever you needed just didn't work that day. The first 4 years were rough and she didn't want me to be alone. Unfortunately, I am alone. Society shuns widowers. The most common question I get…"
Jul 20
Christopher joined Amy's group
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You're too young to be a widow

I never thought that I would be a widow in my forties.  My friends can't relate and feel the need to comment on everything, even if they have no experience with grief.  I know they mean well but only we know what we are going though.See More
Jul 20
Christopher updated their profile
Jul 20

Profile Information

About Me:
Rough life, lots of bad stuff happened. I made sure I did right by folks no matter what. Now I'm ready to move right along.
I learn things and do stuff. Things like EarthShip and No-Till Farming and Aquaponics and Rodin Coils and Home Construction and Orgonite and how to fix a bicycle for a kid or a truck for a dad. I'm a helpy helperton.
Nondenominational Christian. Ask if you are curious. Silence is something I hate.
About my Loss:
She died making love to me. Orgasm killed her (blew out her ascending aorta). She went out with a bang! She was 29. I celebrated with our 5 year old son what would have been her 30th birthday just 2 months later. I was 28. It crushed me. I would have died from my heart stopping if my son didn't need me. I had no support network because everyone was horrified and confused and ... chose not to be available. I grieved alone and was taken advantage of in the following years. I got better.

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At 9:05pm on August 1, 2018, Frances Koonce said…

Dear Christopher, 

I tried to send a short message and a request, but I don’t know if it actually got sent or not. I wanted to offer my condolences to you and your son. 

I noticed that you are a person of faith. Would you care to have some encouragement from the Bible on anxiety? There are several that I find very comforting. 

Again, my sympathy goes to you and your dear son. 

Sincerely,

Frances 

 
 
 

Latest Activity

Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All Guys I was away for few days as I am blessed with a baby girl on 10 Aug 18. Both mother and baby doing fine.  I planned my baby only as my mother wanted to see her grand child but destiny had other plans. But I hope she has still blessed…"
2 hours ago
Rain commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"It's been almost two years for me. It doesn't hurt any less. Some days I push it away but then all of a sudden every bit of it hits like a ton of bricks. I did tell a few of my best friends and I mostly regret it. Now I feel it's just…"
3 hours ago
Frances Koonce replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"Awww- I’m sorry about that! It must make you feel really terrible that you can’t just take her home.  The same thing happened with my mom after her heart attack. She couldn’t just live by herself anymore. We had to empty her…"
5 hours ago
Profile Iconmorgan and Natasha Camacho-Gomes joined Amy Reed's group
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Losing a spouse and dating again

I lost my spouse 16 months ago. Have gotten into a new relationship but he lets me grieve openly. I have a2 year old daughter. Also I am 26See More
7 hours ago
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"iv bean to day to sea her iv hadto liee to her wish i feal bad wen can i go homee wen drs says so wear isdr on holday  why am hear coz dr says so i anserd it for abot 40 mins i did evry tim i leabee i feal dranedd i do  th 5 mons latr she…"
10 hours ago
dream moon JO B and Frances Koonce are now friends
10 hours ago
Jeff Tice commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you bluebird.  My kids have been a huge comfort for me.  Making me laugh even when I don't want to and giving me someone to occupy my time and energy with.  I am working my way through this slowly and they help…"
10 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Jeff, So sorry for your loss."
15 hours ago
Profile IconNancy, Joanna Kalovich and Tea Pot joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
16 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Anxiety/panic is awful, I had it so bad after my mom passed I was walking with my legs shaking, it was awful I though I this how I have to live the rest of my life in a state anxiety/panic? Just awful I understand what you are going through."
21 hours ago
Crystal K commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The indifference is hard. I hate it when people ask me how Zim doing or how lifw is... I just want to scream at them “how do you think it is!” My boss constantly asks me and everytime I just respond with a “fine” or…"
23 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I walk over to my moms picture every single night and say mom I love you I hope you know that."
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I wish that I could have handled the loss of my mother better than I have but I do believe that what I am experiencing is a testament to how much I loved my mom. To have gotten through this without scars would have been awkward as well. I would have…"
yesterday
Monty replied to Cristal's discussion Rejoining the rest of the world in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Crystal   I found going back to work (due to needing to support my family) possibly saved me a little from falling to much into my grief. It was also very good for me to be around normal adults, as i don't have much family near by, and…"
yesterday
Monty commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Jeff sorry to hear about your wife passing. i can only imaging and guess at what your going though.    After my wife passing last year, i had family and friends helping out with me and the boys. i feel that lots of men tend to bury/push…"
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Just to be clear -- I only meant that it's good that your children are with you, and that therefore your wife is too, in a way."
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Jeff, I'm sorry, it must be so difficult with the children. At the same time, they are also part of her, so in that way it's good. My husband died shortly before his 42nd birthday; I was 44. My life ended the moment his did.  Of…"
yesterday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I understand how you feel Virginia when you say nothing makes sense anymore. It is like a puzzle that once fit together. But now pieces are either missing or have changed shape. Bluebell"
yesterday
Jeff Tice commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you Nancy for the kind words. I'm sorry 06to hear about your husband. My wife's grandfather passed away 17 years ago due to cancer that progressed quickly too and I watched her struggle with the grief. I know that your experience is…"
yesterday
Profile IconCheryl and Firah joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday

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