Amatullah
  • Female
  • New York, NY
  • United States
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Amatullah is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 13, 2019

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About my Loss:
In 2017 I lost my husband of 11 years to cardiac arrest. this happened unexpectedly while talking in the bathroom to our 8 year old son. my son is know 10 he has handle his passing better than me. still until this day I cry thinking about him I even moved on thinking I can rekindle my marriage being with another man. this is hard for me to accept I had a amazing husband who accepted my faults. I finally found a man who I can say honestly love, protected, and did everything for me. life won’t never be the same nobody understand the pain I endure everyday just thinking about him, and watching our son grow up without him. never in a million years did I think I will become a widow at 35 years old. a big piece of my life was taken from me I cry everyday I feel guilty moving on so fast being I was afraid to be alone. not one day goes bye without me thinking about him I know he is not comfortable back in my mind I be thinking he going to walk through the door. I feel like I’m about to lose my mind he was my best friend 😢
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Latest Activity

Speed Weasel posted a blog post

Assumptions

An assumption is an unexamined belief: what is thought to be true without ever really realizing that we think in that way. For better or worse, understanding starts with entertaining the idea that something is true.  Truly profound thoughts generally come to light from the relaxation of these (flawed) assumptions.  This is where I find myself today...Perhaps, one of the more significant drivers to pushing down the loss and grief at the time of the accident, ignoring it and mindlessly walking…See More
Wednesday
Profile IconCari Jo Converse, Jennifer and James D. Thornsberry joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
Profile IconMarina Dsouza, Leah, Sandra M Aaron and 5 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 5
esther joined HollowHeart's group
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Sibling Loss

This group is for anyone that has lost a brother or sister. Sibling loss is often minimized and people don't realize how devastating losing a sibling can be. I lost my older sister and my life will never be the same. She was my only sibling, I looked up to her, I went to her for everything. I lost my past, present and future. It is traumatic.See More
Mar 4
Speed Weasel posted a video

Sun Keeps Risin'

Provided to YouTube by The Orchard EnterprisesSun Keeps Risin' · Lissie · Elisabeth Corrin Maurus · Martin CraftMy Wild West℗ 2015 Lionboy RecordsReleased on...
Feb 26
Speed Weasel posted a blog post

Triggers Continue to Surface

Late February is a challenging time of year for me.  Jen’s birthday is the 23rd and serves as an annual reminder of all of the potential that was lost…Her’s (mainly), mine, the world’s honestly.  This year she would be 52…It is increasingly hard to imagine, through all of the iterations possible, what she could have become, what was to be her (significant) impact on the world.That being said, things, emotions, have largely settled down since I committed a potential version of what could have…See More
Feb 15
Michelle joined Gyla Lynn Darden's group
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Loss of a child In memory of my son or daughter

This group focuses on healing ourselves and each other over the death of a child and welcomes a Christian atmosphere to help with the healing process. I welcome all of those grieving.See More
Feb 8
Tammy McLaughlin and Rosie are now friends
Jan 30

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