Alice Thompson
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Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thinking of you, Morgan. Yes, it is a hard, cruel place to be — stuck on this plane after your love has gone. I am forgetting my beautiful other half more and more. I thought I would go with him, but it turns out I didn’t, and I probably…"
Sep 12
Alice Thompson commented on Amber's blog post I Don’t Know How
"Dear Amber, my heart goes out to you. The idea of a blank headstone seems to speak volumes about your loss and the erasing of the future you dreamed of. I struggle with absence as do many people on this site. I wish you strength and patience with…"
Aug 28
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, Nancy and all you wonderful loving friends in this group, I read her book recently. I found it such a relief from the usual things you hear and read. I felt heard and understood. But she also tries valiantly to give advice to people who…"
Aug 26
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Mary, welcome to this group — I’m so very sorry you are suffering the loss of your love, as we are. This is a place full of people who know all too well about the deepest pain of all and yours can be heard and…"
Jul 6
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"While I try my best these days to honour life by living it, the fundamental fact remains that I do not want to be here now that he is dead. So whenever anything challenging happens (several times a day), I completely despair and feel exhausted,…"
Jul 5
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thanks Joe, that is wonderfully affirming — especially coming from a man I admire very much. "
Jun 22
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"That’s lovely, Linda."
May 20
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I watched it too, and I cried, but they were good tears. I have been lucky enough in this life to be loved completely and that love continues. I love him more and more and I know it is the same for him. The physical phase is in the past and it will…"
May 20
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I wish I was allowed to follow him. I know I am repeating myself..."
May 8
Alice Thompson commented on Virginia G's blog post Post traumatic stress disorder
"Hello Virginia, I’m so sorry you are going through this hell. PTSD has been part of my grieving process too. I think that when we lose someone who is absolutely essential to us, our brains don’t have the ability to adjust to the changed…"
Apr 19
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"morgan, I am with you. It feels so unimaginably bad... it IS unimaginably bad, this ultimate loss we are suffering, living with. Who would want to go on under these circumstances that we are experiencing? Some people don’t feel as bad.…"
Apr 13
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"joe and bluebird, I wish for you both to receive an undeniable sign too. I did get one about six weeks after he died. I hope I’m not being annoying in saying this. But it was very definite — proof that he still exists after bodily death,…"
Apr 10
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Linda, yes — the worst has happened. It’s behind us but it’s also the everyday reality we have to live with. Sending you a hug, Alice "
Apr 9
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, thanks for getting it! For me, I think it felt like a surprising realisation because I don’t think of myself as afraid. But now I think I’m perhaps so very afraid that I can’t bear to think about it. It’s not anxiety…"
Apr 9
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello everyone, I think I’ve had a helpful realisation about my psychological state that I wanted to share, in case it rings any bells with fellow grievers. The rotten remains of the garden fence between me and my neighbours (who I don’t…"
Apr 9
Alice Thompson commented on morgan's blog post How long can I last?
"Dear Morgan, we are bearing the unbearable and therefore doing the impossible. No wonder we find ourselves in a place that doesn’t even relate to normal life. It is so cruel, to be put somewhere where you can’t have your love but neither…"
Apr 1

Profile Information

About my Loss:
I lost my partner suddenly in December 2014

Alice Thompson's Blog

My life has become a scary nightmare again

In general, I think I have been managing better in the latter half of this, my third year since my beloved died. How I describe it to anyone who will listen is that the first year was a crazy nightmare, in the second I forced myself to get out and try to create a new life, and in the third, I’ve been able to build on that new life — even though it’s mostly just a matter of going through the motions. I don’t actually WANT to be doing any of it. I feel like someone who has been kidnapped and…

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Posted on December 4, 2017 at 5:06pm — 4 Comments

Comment Wall (6 comments)

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At 7:03am on July 30, 2017, Linda Engberg said…

Alice,

Thanks for your concern about Babie J. she seems to be improving, she can now sit up and use her front legs, the back ones are still weak, I had a wonderful vet who is trying everything to get her up and going again.

At 6:20pm on July 10, 2017, JenShep said…

Hi Alice!  Thanks for your note and I love your idea and it makes me feel better to think that someone out there thinks the way you do. I constantly find myself wanting others to believe what I think/feel but then I wonder why I need that validation. I think it's because I'm unsure and I question myself. So, I really appreciate your deep knowing - it's more validation for me :) And, I know what you mean. If everyone walked around thinking/believing that our loves were still here it wouldn't feel so awful. I sometimes feel okay because I really believe Tom is with me and some of the experiences I've had have been really reassuring.  But sometimes I just really crave his physical presence. The real, solid him.  His laughter, his thoughts/ideas, his big arms around me - and my not having to question it or wonder.  I go from certainty to uncertainty.  And that's where a lot of the ups and downs come in. Maybe along the way I will become more certain and it will get easier.  I hope. It's nice to share this with you :)

At 9:43am on April 10, 2016, O.L. Cato said…

Thanking everyone for their kind words.  It helps so much to know I am not alone in my suffering......the intense grief that I thought I was alone in, is shared with so many kind people.  Thank you for writing and praying and I pry for all of us.

At 1:26pm on February 22, 2016, O.L. Cato said…

Alice,

I can't believe my darling is gone.  The loneliness is almost unbearable.  It had been just US for the past five years.  John's COPD pretty much kept him tethered to his Oxygen machine and made our lives mostly solitary. He should have lived longer, his big heart finally gave out.  We knew what each other was thinking.  I don't know how I can go on without him.

At 5:40pm on January 17, 2016, Minky Merlin said…
Thanks from Minky.
At 4:22pm on October 27, 2015, Fran said…

Friends don't know until they go thru it. I look back now and remember I wasn't as empathetic as I would be/am now. I've had a lot of practice now....

 
 
 

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Profile IconCynthia Garcia Buckles and Lori joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Emily joined Megan's group
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Grieving Teens

This group is for anyone who lost their parents at a young age. I lost my dad to cancer a week before the start of my senior year. It's been difficult. Quite frankly it sucks. Lets join together and get through this crappy time.
yesterday
Emily joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
yesterday
Profile IconElizabeth Monroe, Marion Mcglashon, Bandar killa and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Robin H left a comment for Robin H
"Hey There People, most of the comments look kinda old here... Are they?"
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia, losing your mom is hard enough. When you also lived with her that takes it to a whole different level because you didn't experience the natural separation that other adults do. That's sure what happened to me. I lived with my mom and…"
Monday
Profile IconCorinne C. Rico, Rita A M, Marisa L Galeoti and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Louise Grady updated their profile
Monday
Lia Lynch commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thank you everyone. My mom had refused to see doctors for seven years; she feel ill, finally went, was diagnosed with Stage IV metastasized cancer in her throat, lung, and liver, went directly to hospice, and died less than 4 weeks from the initial…"
Monday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Lia,  So sorry for your loss.  Similar to others, I can understand your pain. I wish comfort to you but I know it is not easy. Please take your time.  All people, I was travelling so could not post for long. This is to tell that I…"
Monday
Geri commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Everyone, This Friday 21st September will be our 27th wedding anniversary. It is my first without my husband and I've noticed my anxiety peaking and I'm back to waking every hour. Has anyone got any advice of how to cope with all the…"
Monday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Thank you Layla Richards. I was very religious before my husband died, Then after his death I started searching why we have to go thru such pains and was looking into everything. Then after reading the Bible, the Torah, the Koran and more religious…"
Monday
Linda Engberg commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"Hi Pamela, So sorry about the lost of your Husband, it has been 5 years and to be truthful things are not any better. We were very close, he was my rock, now I am nothing."
Sunday
Suzy Tatz commented on Katherine Ellis's group Losing Someone to Cancer
"I am new to this. I lost my dad June 7 2018 to lung cancer and my fiancé on Aug. 6. 2018 to colon cancer. I was caretaker to both and now I can’t stand being in my own skin. I have the panic feelings when I am alone. So I have been self…"
Sunday
Suzy Tatz joined Katherine Ellis's group
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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
Sunday
Layla Richards replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"That is some great advice Ofir Rifo. Also, bluebird, something that helped me a lot was reading through the thousands of stories contributed by individuals who had a near-death experience or received an after death communication from a passed loved…"
Sunday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"ANA BECOAH BY ovadia chamama. Miracle prayer even for those who do not believe in anything. It will act as a password and will open the universe who will answer your petition. Please bluebird just try the same way a tried and it worked. Remember you…"
Sunday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia I am so sorry for your loss. Bluebell"
Sunday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Bluebird please go to you tube in listen to a song called Ana Becoh by Ovadiada Chamama. This song will act as a password to the universe. You do not need to believe in any religion but It worked for me and I am an agnostic. I lost my husband 21…"
Sunday
Ofir Rifo replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Hello Bluebird. I always remember you and wonder how you are doing since the last time I wrote to you for the first time when I found this blog. It has been a while and I was hoping by this time you were doing better. Please understand that you will…"
Sunday

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