I’m 46, mom of Olivia (15) and Oscar (11), I live in Truckee, California. I’m divorced though I still have a great friendship with my ex.
About my Loss:
My mom died in a car accident when I was 20. She was hurrying to drive home to meet me. Last day I saw her was Christmas. When I met my husband, my mother-in-law decided I was weak and did everything she could to ruin my marriage. My oldest childhood friend committed suicide when I was 33. At this same time my daughter was 2, and I developed horrific migraines. I was in the ER 10x in two months. I started working for my neurologist who kept me on a migraine medication I was allergic to, and I nearly died. At 38 my stepdad (he raised me and was my everything next to my mom) died in a motorcycle accident. The last day I talked to him was Christmas. Within six weeks, my dog, who truly was my first child died and my father (a lifelong alcoholic) was in the ICU and then skilled nursing facilities for a year. I stood by his side and was hopeful for the first time in my life, only to have him relapse and go right back to drinking. Since then I left my marriage because my ex husband’s anger became out of control. I had to get a domestic violence restraining order and it is only now, after two years, that we are friends. Finally I have family members and so many friends who lost everything in the Camp Fire last month. I have a lifetime of memories in Paradise, because I’m from Chico, and the town is leveled.
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I am not a doctor but I am a student of the Bible. It seems that you are suffering from anxiety over your past. Humans including ourselves seem to filter the good things we have done and focus on the "bad". But God is the opposite.…"
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