almost 2 years since you have been gone and it feels like yesterday when my world got turned upside down.if only i could talk to you again...i love you Grandma
its been 2 years and 4 months since my gran passed away and it still hurts as much as it did the morning she died. i relieve that day every min. of everyday. my family dont understand why it still hurts and my husband doesnt understand either. i am left to silently grieve alone
nancy,
i am so sorry for your lose .I understand what you are going through .i hate the feeling of being alone trying to deal with this pain and no one understanding it.I have heard all the excuses on why i should let it go..but letting it go to me is letting all my memories of her go too.so here we are :(
Carmen,
its hard when people look at you and say god this again so i just dont talk to anyone. i wish i could tell people its gets easier but it hasnt for me so i dont know what to say to anyone. i write some poetry about how i feel about the loss of my gran and how my pain is so unbearable. many hugs and hope your grieving gets better over time
I have a friend who has really been there for me but I think she's tired of hearing about my grief too. She probably wants me to go to Ohio to see grandma to 1. Be rid of me for a few days and 2. So I will quite talking about needing to go. She says there is no problem and we are friends but sometimes I am not so convinced. Sometimes I wonder if it would be better to go back to stuffing my feelings and stop burdening her with everything. Grief is very lonely.
everyone keeps saying i am in a bad mood i am upset and now for 2 days i havent talked to anyone i just sit here silently dying inside needing to get away.
Very sad day, Grandma and I used to sit on her porch swing on the 4th and watch the neighbors fireworks. funny how the smallest things come back to bite you when your not expecting it.
Today is the one year anniversary of my beloved grandma's death. I miss her so much. I hate that I am too far away to visit her grave. I am really hoping my bff can come over this afternoon to just sit with me and hold my hand, let me cry.
Amy,
I understand the being so far away from her grave .I am 4 hours away from my grandma's grave and the 2 yr anniversary of her death is next week.I feel like i am hitting rock bottom again like it was yesterday..I hope you can find someone to be with you today. Hugs!
I am the rainbow that feels the sky
I hear your cry from the heaven's high
I know your hurt but please don't cry
I know it was hard for you to say goodbye
When the angel said my time was near
Suddenly my eyes shed many tears
Grieve for me not my angel girl
For grandma will always be near
Heavenly father can you hear my prayer ?
Deep within my soul my faith has been shattered
Please god tell me why have you forgotten me ?
My dear sweet child for I have not forsaken you
Though many times you feel alone
Many tears I see fall from your eyes
I hold you close to my heart as i hear your cries
My child "Put your faith and trust in me"
I'll ease your pain in time you'll see
I promise you will see your loved one again
When your time has come to leave this world
My angel's will bring you home to me
Where I shall be waiting my child
With the gates of heaven open for you
I hope everyone likes the poems. I wrote them for myself and the grieving group because i know what it feels like to lose a loved one. My gran's death still hurts every min. of every day and its been over 2 years
Amy i know its hard lord knows i cant let my gran go. I havent been to her grave since the funeral i just cant it hurts so much. Dont let anyone make you feel bad because you cant let your grandma go just yet. We all grieve in our own way and in our own time.
I love the rainbow poem. but it made me cry..my grandma always called me "sweet angel" so it touch home. every part of my house has a part of grandma in it things that used to be hers . i have even thought about packing them up it hurts so bad seeing them.
Carmen,
I still have yet to go through my gran's stuff to just to painful. my gran always called me her sweet angel girl . it seems like the pain will never stop hurting doesnt carmen its just horrible and most people are tired of hearing bout how much you miss her.
my name is danny and i lost my grandma on march 13th....my grandma was like my mom i loved her and she was also like a father to me she took me fighing every weekend and we went to church well now that shes gone im just like lost i miss her so much and i just feel drained
2 years ago yesterday i lost my grandma .i cant believe it has been that long when it feels like yesterday.I walked around yesterday in a haze just going through the motions of the day to try and get through it.Not sure i did very well but here i am missing her more today than yesterday. Lost in my world with no one to understand it
my grandma died 3 years ago i use to cry alot be cause i thought of her more like my mom then my grandma. we still dont know what exactly she died of but it was really hard because she lived in puerto rico and we lived in miami and also i was in my senior year in high school so my mom didnt want me to go over there and so my mom went on that monday and my grandmother died that wednesday i was really heartbroken because i couldnt even go to her funeral. she was an amazing woman and i admire he alot and in more than one way. but the really hard part was knowing that my grampa would stay alone and having some1 around for over 40 something years and to lose ur soulmate especially after the doctors told them that she was getting out the hopital the next day but she didnt even make it til the and it was right before my18th birthday and right before my graduation and we were going to go visit her that summer after i graduated
My Granny died on November 9, 2010. She and I were so close and I miss her dearly. Something that helped a little was my husband bought me a Grandma locket at Walmart and now I can keep Granny and her photos close to my heart. It feels extremely painful but I am hoping that this will help.
Tina,
I am so sorry .I have been in counseling since grandma died. I made a bracelet of different beads representing things about my grandma so when things get hard or the pain of losing her gets bad i can look at it and remember the lil things that at the time i cant. Sometimes it makes me smile and other times it dont help at all but i have to believe that someday i will see her again and never to be parted. If you need to talk just yell and i will be here for you.
I will never believe that time makes the hurt go away...i think about her everyday and have to stop myself from calling her,This is a hard month for me .this week is my b-day week and her b-day is coming up in a couple of weeks .I have to hope that she is still around me guiding along the way until we meet again..I miss her so much:(
I really miss my gran this month is also very hard for me as she passed on feb.28. I still cry everyday on top of that i found out my husband is cheating on me after 20 years of marriage. Its just a double whammy on me. I wish i could see my gran i am so hurt and exposed . I was asked by my dr. to in one word describe how i feel. I said i felt broken
My grandma passed away Feb. 22, 2011 a month ago this Tuesday. I miss her terribly and it hurts so bad. We found out two days before Christmas last year that she had Stage 4 colon or ovarian cancer. They let her come home with in home Hospice care and we all spent our last bittersweet holiday with her. We thought she had a bit longer as she was doing good for awhile. I visited her several times a week and went to church every Sunday minus one week with her and my mom and sis. We had plans to make her dinner on St. Patrick's day and have a birthday celebration on March 6th for me at her house. None of that happened. Instead the day after my 35th birthday we celebrated her life with a memorial service at her church. The following Sunday we went to her church for the first time without her. It was really sad! I am really sad. I have been doing fairly well on/off but today is the worst day since that day a month ago. Yesterday I received my copy of her Last Will and Testament. I couldn't stay at work more than an hour today so that's why I am on here today. Peace and blessings to all going through this journey.
Another memorial day has gone by and i didnt get to the grave(almost 5 hours away) I HATE that i didnt get to grandma and my dad's and lil brothers grave .I miss her just as much as i ever have..got a DVD yesterday of my dad and Grandma was on it talking and smiling so happy.TORE my heart out seeing her and wanting so badly to call her up and hear her voice...I love you Grandma and miss you more and more everyday.You would be so proud of your great grand kids.Jason is working so hard in the US ARMY to make you proud! watch over him because i do not get to see him much and Kaitlin just got done with her first year of college, Ethan will be in the 10th grade next year( they grow up so fast) and Marita is doing her best to remind Shelby of you......NOTHING is right without you here!
I just lost my grandma June20, 2011. My grandma and I were very close . she helped raise me so she was more like a mother than a grandma. She is the only blood relative that attended my wedding. I feel so lost without her. she supported me through the good and bad times. My world has turned upside down since loosing her in June of this year. some days I want to ask the Lord why did you have to take her now? well, I knew it was comming sooner or later. but it hurts so much when you are so close to someone. She knew all my secrets and hopes and dreams. May she rest in peace. I miss her dearly. Hugs to My Grandma that I love so so much.
Wow it's unreal how i can relate to all of the comments already posted. I lost my Baba to cancer on Feb 27, 2011 and i've been crying everyday since then. She had a huge role in my life, and my wedding was her last family gathering before her passing. So unfortuneately the pictures taken were used for the memorial and obituary. I'm happy to have had her there but this almost taints the memories of that day now.
On our one year anniversary we watched our wedding video and it was more difficult than any other thing i've been through, just to see her there, happy, smiling and dancing with me just like i'd talked about for years with her. I've been seeing a grief councellor but i just am not getting the results i'd hoped for. I'm sad, maybe even depressed i'm not sure cuz i refuse to admit this to any dr. I just don't know how to get on with my life, she is in mydreams, my thoughts, and i swear some days she is looking over my shoulder. I am in the health care field and understand the anatomy and physiology about the cancer she had and how it all works. I was almost educating her as it happened. She did not take my advise about the chemo or radiation and for that i'm upset but it was her lifet o live and that is how she chose to do it. But seeing her so helpless, unable to talk, unable to be cognitive broke my heart, that is so out of character for her and for that i'm very angry with god for taking that away from me before taking her. I only hope that she is proud of me. I can't even talk to my husband anymore about this because he has nothing more to say to me about it, as he has never experienced death in that capasity yet. I am lost and have to stop myself from calling her....and to be perfectly honest sometimes i just dial the number in hope to hear her voice but the number is disconnected, i fear for the next person that gets that number. I just wish i could have had more time with her and one last good conversation about her expectations for my life and her most proud moments, but since she was not a sentimental person these conversations were few and far between. I love her and miss her and will do both of these things till the day i die.
another birthday is going by and your not here..I miss you and love you....Happy birthday grandma ..heaven is so lucky to have you ..so much has happened since you left us ..so wish you were here so I could talk to you.so lonely without you.
8 mos. Since I lost my dear grandma. I miss her more and more each day. There are times when I just want to pick up the phone and call her and I know I can't. Its so hard to find another female that I can trust with all the stuff that I talked to my grandma about. I talked to her about the up most personal thing from sexual feelings to just shooting the breeze with her to chat. I could tease her and she would know that I was just joking. or I could tell her that I am having personal problems say exactly what my feelings are and she would be there and say some calming words. I miss Grandma so very much. I reciently went into a relapse with my mental condition and I know Grandma would be a great support and now that she is gone it feels that much harder and the loss is more dominate. asking for positive support as I deal with my emotional problems and issues. Hugs to all
Carmen
Jun 29, 2010
nancy
Jun 30, 2010
Carmen
i am so sorry for your lose .I understand what you are going through .i hate the feeling of being alone trying to deal with this pain and no one understanding it.I have heard all the excuses on why i should let it go..but letting it go to me is letting all my memories of her go too.so here we are :(
Jun 30, 2010
nancy
its hard when people look at you and say god this again so i just dont talk to anyone. i wish i could tell people its gets easier but it hasnt for me so i dont know what to say to anyone. i write some poetry about how i feel about the loss of my gran and how my pain is so unbearable. many hugs and hope your grieving gets better over time
Jun 30, 2010
Lisa Westgate
Jul 1, 2010
Amy Zielke
Jul 3, 2010
nancy
Jul 3, 2010
Carmen
Jul 4, 2010
Amy Zielke
Aug 7, 2010
Carmen
I understand the being so far away from her grave .I am 4 hours away from my grandma's grave and the 2 yr anniversary of her death is next week.I feel like i am hitting rock bottom again like it was yesterday..I hope you can find someone to be with you today. Hugs!
Aug 7, 2010
nancy
I am the rainbow that feels the sky
I hear your cry from the heaven's high
I know your hurt but please don't cry
I know it was hard for you to say goodbye
When the angel said my time was near
Suddenly my eyes shed many tears
Grieve for me not my angel girl
For grandma will always be near
Aug 7, 2010
nancy
Heavenly father can you hear my prayer ?
Deep within my soul my faith has been shattered
Please god tell me why have you forgotten me ?
My dear sweet child for I have not forsaken you
Though many times you feel alone
Many tears I see fall from your eyes
I hold you close to my heart as i hear your cries
My child "Put your faith and trust in me"
I'll ease your pain in time you'll see
I promise you will see your loved one again
When your time has come to leave this world
My angel's will bring you home to me
Where I shall be waiting my child
With the gates of heaven open for you
Aug 7, 2010
nancy
Aug 7, 2010
nancy
Aug 7, 2010
Carmen
I love the rainbow poem. but it made me cry..my grandma always called me "sweet angel" so it touch home. every part of my house has a part of grandma in it things that used to be hers . i have even thought about packing them up it hurts so bad seeing them.
Aug 7, 2010
nancy
I still have yet to go through my gran's stuff to just to painful. my gran always called me her sweet angel girl . it seems like the pain will never stop hurting doesnt carmen its just horrible and most people are tired of hearing bout how much you miss her.
Aug 7, 2010
Carmen
Aug 7, 2010
daniel hallingshead
Aug 10, 2010
Carmen
Aug 13, 2010
steacy del valle
Nov 11, 2010
Tina Vardal
Nov 15, 2010
Carmen
I am so sorry .I have been in counseling since grandma died. I made a bracelet of different beads representing things about my grandma so when things get hard or the pain of losing her gets bad i can look at it and remember the lil things that at the time i cant. Sometimes it makes me smile and other times it dont help at all but i have to believe that someday i will see her again and never to be parted. If you need to talk just yell and i will be here for you.
Nov 15, 2010
nancy
Dec 22, 2010
Carmen
BS,
I will never believe that time makes the hurt go away...i think about her everyday and have to stop myself from calling her,This is a hard month for me .this week is my b-day week and her b-day is coming up in a couple of weeks .I have to hope that she is still around me guiding along the way until we meet again..I miss her so much:(
Feb 13, 2011
nancy
Feb 13, 2011
Kathy Perry
Mar 25, 2011
Carmen
May 31, 2011
Adriene M. Peruzzi
Jul 31, 2011
Lacie Carroll
Wow it's unreal how i can relate to all of the comments already posted. I lost my Baba to cancer on Feb 27, 2011 and i've been crying everyday since then. She had a huge role in my life, and my wedding was her last family gathering before her passing. So unfortuneately the pictures taken were used for the memorial and obituary. I'm happy to have had her there but this almost taints the memories of that day now.
Oct 27, 2011
Lacie Carroll
Oct 27, 2011
Carmen
Lacie if your still on..go to chat and i will talk to you there
Oct 27, 2011
Carmen
another birthday is going by and your not here..I miss you and love you....Happy birthday grandma ..heaven is so lucky to have you ..so much has happened since you left us ..so wish you were here so I could talk to you.so lonely without you.
Feb 28, 2012
Adriene M. Peruzzi
8 mos. Since I lost my dear grandma. I miss her more and more each day. There are times when I just want to pick up the phone and call her and I know I can't. Its so hard to find another female that I can trust with all the stuff that I talked to my grandma about. I talked to her about the up most personal thing from sexual feelings to just shooting the breeze with her to chat. I could tease her and she would know that I was just joking. or I could tell her that I am having personal problems say exactly what my feelings are and she would be there and say some calming words. I miss Grandma so very much. I reciently went into a relapse with my mental condition and I know Grandma would be a great support and now that she is gone it feels that much harder and the loss is more dominate. asking for positive support as I deal with my emotional problems and issues. Hugs to all
Mar 20, 2012