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Orphaned Adults

This group is for adults who have lost both parents and are struggling with coming to terms with this impact, which is harder then you realize till it happens to you.

Members: 80
Latest Activity: Jul 3, 2023

Discussion Forum

No way back to the past...

I am an only child...I lost my dad at 2 & my mom at 27, which I had just given birth to her first grandbaby 22 days before she passed away. Trying to be a parent, with no one around to say "did I…Continue

Started by Sarah Slagle Nov 9, 2012.

Orphaned adults - too young for the 'middle aged' literature, too old for the child/adolescent ... Any for young adults?

Hello, my name is Catherine. I'm 30 a year old and an 'orphaned adult'. I am the eldest of 3 children. Our father died suddenly at 45, when were aged 19, 17 and 13 (respectively). We lost our mother…Continue

Started by Catherine Robson May 21, 2012.

Longing for belonging 3 Replies

I don't feel like I belong to anyone, and there is nobody else who will love me unconditionally like my parents did.  I feel so alone.  I am only 26 and have my whole life ahead of me.  I have some…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Brenda Ann Jan 13, 2012.

Both at the same time??? I just dont understand... 1 Reply

Hey everyone all most 2 months ago now on July 13th 2011 I lost both my Mother (Donna) and Father (Bruce) in a tragic Semi-truck accident. My parents had been team over the road drivers for almost…Continue

Started by Amber Nichole Scarborough McGhee. Last reply by Ruth Oct 10, 2011.

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Comment by Sarah on November 23, 2011 at 1:14pm

Dear Thomas,

I wish there were a good answer to your question about when this gets easier. Dec. 5 will be 31 years since I lost my Mom, (I was 11) and I just lost my Pop on Oct. 5 of this year. Honestly, it is hard to tell the difference some days and on others I do pretty well. This will be the first Thanksgiving that I do not see anyone I am related to. I'll have my moments and will pull through, just as I know you will.

You are in my thoughts as are all in this group, especially this holiday season!

Sarah

Comment by barb blake on November 23, 2011 at 1:09pm

Hi Thomas:

 

I understand

I was looking at the Xmas cards

addressed to both parents

and oh my, it is painful

 

sending a big hug down there to you

people..

 

Im not in US

 

take care

 

we will get through

Im going to church service

 

 

Sedona :)

Comment by barb blake on November 23, 2011 at 1:08pm

Hello this day to all posting:

 

I send out my condolences to all

who suffer losses, so sad

 

June end, I lost Mom

and just last week we

had the funeral service for Dad

 

both had b een in a nursing home

 

I am taking some counselling

for grief

 

hugs to all

 

 

 

Sedona   
:)

Comment by Thomas Brophy on November 23, 2011 at 12:59pm

Yesterday I went to buy a Thanksgiving card for my friend, and the first card I saw read " To The Most Wonderful Mom and Dad. I cannot believe how it was like a punch in the gut. My three year old even asked me what was wrong and if I was sad. This is the first holiday season without both of my parents. Mom died in June and dad two years prior. As I watch my friends getting excited about the holidays and black friday, I start feeling very afraid. Afraid because just when I think I have a hold on my grief and I am finally winning the holidays come around. Everything about the holidays reminds me of my parents. I love my memories of the holidays with them, but now having to do this without them is terrifying. I know I should not such a wimp, but grief has beaten  me down like nothing else I have ever experienced. I am Thankful for the time I had with them, but I really wanted to build on more memories with them sharing the holidays with my children. I am finding it harder and harder to put on a brave face when I feel so broken. Somedays it feels like physical pain. When will this get easier?

Comment by Sarah on November 2, 2011 at 9:04am
Birthdays

Today would be my Pops 70th birthday. We just lost him less than a month ago. I have no idea how to get through today and remain functional. We werena family that always spent birthdays together. After the death of my Mom, grandparents and others, it was Pop that made birthdays still special. Wouldnlovento hear how anyone else gets through these, especially the first ones!
Comment by Kandi Broussard on October 26, 2011 at 10:00am
yes, Sarah.  that feeling seems to come in waves for me.  In fact, all of my emotions seem to come in waves.  I never know how I am going to feel from one day to the next.  It is an emotional roller coaster with no end in sight.
Comment by Sarah on October 26, 2011 at 9:53am
I just lost my Pop to Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma this month following a very short but cruel illness. He died just two month shy of the 31st anniversary of my Mom's death. I was 11 then. I am now totally unsure of which end is up? I think I am struggling more with a feeling of being lost than grieving. Anyone else know that feeling?
Comment by Cindi B on October 4, 2011 at 3:05pm
I'm glad others feel this way too. I've spent my whole life grieving for my father. A man I didn't know. He died when I was 3 months old. I thought I knew what grief was. No way, not even close. I feel completely lost with out my mother. She's the Only person that understood me. I can't imagine anything being as hard to get though than grief.
Comment by Amber Nichole Scarborough McGhee on September 6, 2011 at 8:19pm
Hey everyone all most 2 months ago now on July 13th 2011 I lost both my Mother (Donna) and Father (Bruce) in a tragic Semi-truck accident. My parents had been team over the road drivers for almost 7-10 years and my father had been over the road for 22 years so it was like second nature to the both of them. The accident happend in FL where they resided and they had actually just left the house that morning. The accident only happend about 50 miles away from where they lived actually at 8:30am that morning I unfortunatly live in IL so was not able to get to FL till 9am the next morning. I didnt even find out about the accident till 11am after their names and everything had already been released to the press. Then when I get down there they refuse to let me view the bodies this has been very hard for me to deal with. Now that the investigation is almost complete and they still have no answers cause there was no witnesses to the accident and no one knows what caused the accident they will release pictures to me of my mom and dad after the accident. A part of me wants to see them cause I have no closer then everyone else tells me not to do it to myself but i keep asking everyone when will see to believe stop i can not live with the feeling of not knowing for the rest of my life can anyone help.
Comment by Stefanie Parise on August 11, 2011 at 5:03pm
"It is extraordinarily difficult to deal with but somehow we just do it." That is like the best thing I've ever heard... It's so raw and just true, unfortunately. Ruth - I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you.. I've been at work and just cried and flipped out on people for no reason and made a fool out of myself, too. I think we probably all have done something like that at least once, so you're not alone in that at least! Anyway, I've been on an upswing with my horrendous grief and guilt, but that certainly isn't going to last much longer. I can sense another depression coming like a volcano about to erupt. I hope that everyone else is having an okay time and makes it through the rest of the week in one piece. Thank you all for just being here. <3
 

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