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Lost My Spouse...

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The Holiday Season and my loss 1 Reply

This Christmas Season this year is very hard.Family gatherings are wonderful but l feel my husband not being so much more.Seeing everyone makes it more real that Ron is not here.The tears are in my…Continue

Started by Denise Lavoie. Last reply by Linda Engberg Dec 24, 2018.

Lost my wife 14 Replies

It's been almost a week since i lost my wife to lung disease. She's in my mind 24/7. I don't have anybody else to talk too. I was carred by emotional and physical abuse mostly in my childhood in…Continue

Started by Kyle McKay. Last reply by Corinne C. Rico Nov 12, 2018.

Lost my husband the father of my kids and bestfriend . 3 Replies

  I lost my husband we were high school sweethearts we had plans and it was not suppose to be this way we had two kids together and I feel so lost and the pain i feel becuase of how much I miss him…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Fran Oct 19, 2018.

FAILING 9 Replies

next month will be three years since I lost my husband and I'm failing miserably I am in serious debt I cant fix, I stay home because I have extreme difficulty leaving my house I don't know how to…Continue

Started by Pamela philipp. Last reply by Corinne C. Rico Oct 4, 2018.

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Comment by Ally M on March 23, 2015 at 11:15pm

thank you, i just have started pacing the house when i am home, talking to him and praying he is at peace.  i wish he could send me some sign that he is happy so i could find some peace too.

Comment by Tildyc on March 23, 2015 at 11:08pm
Hi Ally- I lost my Mark Feb 4, 2015. I don't know when it's ever going to get better.... If ever. But I do know exactly how you feel, I think.
Comment by Ally M on March 23, 2015 at 11:01pm

Hi everyone, I lost my husband on Feb. 8, 2015 and i feel like i am doing worse these past 2 weeks than i did before.  Is that normal?  Steve was 46 yrs. old and i recently turned 44.  We didn't have any children together, so the house is so quiet.  I feel like everyone around me expects me to be improving.  I don't know what to tell them, except 'i'm okay'. 

Comment by Tildyc on March 23, 2015 at 10:59pm
So this might seem a little corny to everyone else but – I'm a fan of music. And I have not been able to listen to music since the day Mark died. But this song snuck in on me tonight and the words are amazing...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2RgcaNV0Nw&sns=em
Comment by Roger on March 23, 2015 at 9:58pm

John, I am right there with you my friend. As I have said many times. If I won the lottery today. It wouldn't matter one bit to me. I couldn't share it with Karla. I don't want anything. I need very little. "Things" are point less when you have loss something so very important to you like you and I have. Your bitterness is certainly understandable. Completely justifiable in my mind. I will keep you in my prayers

Comment by Roger on March 23, 2015 at 8:50pm

Hey John,

I saw on of your post where you were going to have to declare bankruptcy because of your wife's debt on her credit card. My wife and I kept our finances separate. She had her credit cards. I had my credit cards. In our own name. She would keep track of what we both spent on our living expenses. Every once in a while we would settle up. It work out fine for us. My point in telling you, is after she passed away. She left a credit card bill in the amount of about 350 dollars. I called the card company. To inform them she had passed away. So they could cancel her card. I also want to ask about settling the balance. After finally getting to talk to a person. Told them the reason for the call. I was given a number of a all together different company that handled accounts where the card holder had passed away. I told him my wife had passed and was given this number by the credit card company to cancel her account. He immediately read me a statement that I was informed they had to do as required by law. Part of the statement was that I was as a surviving spouse "NOT" responsible for the out standing balance on her card. I ask if I could pay it. That it was for purchases that she had made for us. I would be more than glade to take care of it. He said, certainty that would be much appreciated. I did. I am not sure all of the circumstances of why as a  surviving spouse that the debt didn't transfer to me but it didn't. I am in Tennessee. Like I said. The card was in her name only. You might want to look into it further.  

Comment by Donna M Dowling-Hall on March 23, 2015 at 6:24pm

I am beginning to realize that I will never be the same and it sucks beyond belief.  I don't feel whole, I don't feel confident, I don't feel secure and I don't feel loved anymore.  I go through the motions everyday, just to get through the day.  I feel that I am in more pain today than I was right after he died.  I am crying more.  

My husband was so full of life.  He was the life of the party and everybody loved him.   People say they are there for me, but I just don't know.   

Comment by Donna M Dowling-Hall on March 23, 2015 at 6:17pm

Tildyc, you are lucky, I have no voice mails to listen to.  I really wasn't a picture taker and am relying on friends and family for pictures of Jeremy.  I was able to find an app to move his texts to me to my email.  I transferred all his pictures that he took on his phone to the computer also. 

Comment by Tildyc on March 23, 2015 at 5:56pm
I was actually addressing Jason's last post and put in John name. But I guess it applies to all of us really.
Comment by Tildyc on March 23, 2015 at 5:51pm
Yup- I have to be careful around my phone. It has plenty of pictures and videos and voice recordings and messages and texts of a happier time. And I used to feel loved and secure and was outgoing and friendly. Truly happy.

Now I'm just the opposite of all of that. I spend a lot of time crying and pleading for Mark to come home. Which I realize is completely ridiculous because, he's-never-coming-back, for goodness sake. It's just so painfully hard to accept. The future looks empty and bleak and lonely. And It blows me away how- in one freakin moment- how you can go from a solid, happy and an amazing life to this lost, foreign and empty plain of existence.

So, in my humble opinion John T- we will forever be changed and can never be the same again. And I hate it. It's BS.
 

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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Our last trip together, cruise to the Bahamas. What a great memory."
yesterday
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"sinse goin  to spookss spirtt churchhss it seams to  get me comfott it dz i dt frs fewa; feal alonee i do not not iv sean  peplee in tears ti i do bt so omftin ido not get told how i…"
Friday
Addie commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"I had a relationship with someone for 5 years. I am married, and wasn't ready to leave my husband. So this man and I met infrequently (every month or 2) and talked a lot through text, but I felt like we had a very close bond. He finally told me…"
Thursday
Addie joined Cathy Richardson's group
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Being the Other Woman/Other Man

This is for anyone who has lost their lover to death and you were the other woman/other man in their life. We have to grieve in silence. I can't find any support groups and feel like I'm the only one going through this situationSee More
Thursday
Profile IconAddie and Donald Perry joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, Your wife, the love of your life, is BEAUTIFUL! And it does seem like it was destiny that brought the two of you together. Beautiful story of the two of you meeting for the first time. Like Linda says, we have to be grateful that God sent us…"
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, Your wife is beautiful. We just have to so blessed for God sending us our soulmates."
Wednesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Everyone,  Thanks for the cudos. I know every one of us is trying to cope with the loss of our Beloved Spouses. I too cannot do the things we shared and that's just about everything. Our likes were the same, so the only thing I did…"
Wednesday
Profile IconMary and Leane joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Wednesday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I am so grateful that each of you share what you are doing and how you are dealing with your loss at whatever stage in months or years.  In the past I never had to worry about looking for company for misery.  I wasn't miserable.…"
Wednesday
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Trina, Thanks for your encouraging words."
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, What you say here about your day sounds like my miserable daily schedule: "My schedule is pretty much go to the bedroom between 1 to 4am and most often I sleep until 11 or noon.  And if I have to get up quickly I find I end up…"
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Marita,  I can relate to what you are saying: the activities that Joseph and I loved to do together are now very painful to do on my own. But it seems that you have started taking baby steps in the right direction by starting to run again.…"
Tuesday
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, This is awesome! How inspiring that you run marathons to honor your beloved husband and soulmate Julian at age 65! "
Tuesday
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, That is quite an accomplishment! My husband was my running partner and we did a lot of charity runs together. My last run was 2 months after he died and dedicated the run to him. Since then I have tried running alone but it was too…"
Tuesday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi All, This is now I cope with the loss of MY BELOVED HUSBAND AND SOULMATE JULIAN. I run marathons in his honor, it keeps me going. I ran 26.2 miles in his memory at 65."
Tuesday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I am finding it so hard to keep motivated.  I have tons I need to do to keep afloat and try to honor the legacy of my husband and yet all I seem able to do is push myself, force myself.......constantly. Its the putting on the mask and…"
Tuesday
Profile IconMichelle and Amanda joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Mar 18
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"When your ‘life force’ is taken away from you there is no will to go on.  It will be 5 years for me soon and many people think my grief has subsided as I seem to be functioning better, but as I said earlier we just become more adept…"
Mar 17
dream moon JO B commented on M Adams's blog post Who copes best with loss? Men or women?
"do not no wen dad died i loss my way for long tim u cud  say i did im f i am'thn loss folerd evn my cat i had for 16 yrs in 2016 wish she got me thru few dark tims she did  thn i gon to spirtaslt churchh  fond upliftmtn i di did…"
Mar 17

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