Missing my Son or Daughter

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Missing my Son  or  Daughter

For all of us that are suffering the loss a son or daughter.

Members: 442
Latest Activity: on Wednesday

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Please share your Story = the Loss of your Son or Daughter 466 Replies

Started by Kar. Last reply by toni m dicarlo Jun 17, 2018.

STUPID things people say... " Vent Here " 182 Replies

Started by Kar. Last reply by Robert Matthews Mar 11, 2018.

Lost Faith 58 Replies

Started by cindy parrott. Last reply by Dennis C. Jun 27, 2015.

The HOW ARE YOU dreaded Question ???? How do you answer??? 49 Replies

Started by Kar. Last reply by Robert Matthews Mar 11, 2018.

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Comment by Sue M on January 26, 2020 at 11:24pm

im sorry Shirelle, the computer changed your name to Shirley. 

Comment by Sue M on January 26, 2020 at 11:22pm

Hello Shirley,

im so sorry for you and your family. I know how deep, sharp, and unimaginable this pain is. I know too how it breaks you up and your world too. It was like looking through a broken kaleidoscope for me. Nothing seemed whole, I trusted no one or anything. 

I send you what you need the most right now, and that's a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on as long as you need and the understanding only a mother can know. 

People would say to me it gets better, I didn't believe them or I didn't want it to. That meant to me I was forgetting him and every precious second of his life I wanted to recall and never forget. That seemed the worst to me. But the pain does become less sharp over time, it does allow you to breathe and to function, one day. You need this, nobody can sustain that level of pain over such a long time. You need the breaks from it and the lessening sharpness of it.

your other children will also be suffering, seeing you in pain and also their own. I hope you can be strong so that they can feel they can come to you.

i was alone in a foreign country, a new home and I didn't know anyone. My other children all adults were coping their own way. It was a terrible time but I came through. Some days the grief takes over again and that's ok, 

i am here and you can talk to me.

big hug

sue

Comment by Shirelle on January 26, 2020 at 6:15pm
My son came home for 3 month then died
Comment by Shirelle on January 26, 2020 at 6:04pm
My son pass away Nov 25 at 936am my life has not been the same I really feel lost , empty nothing to live for but I have 3 other kids I love them more than anything I just don't know what to do please can someone help me
Comment by Sue M on January 14, 2020 at 11:30am

Hello to all of you who are here for the same unimaginable reason as I am. I found this website last night after another night of going to bed where instead of sleep, pain sets in that I was able to escape from all day by being busy. Jess's mom, your post really resonated with me. Its been three years, nearly four since I lost my second son Corey. I to walk in a sort of slumber half here and half there, brain operating just enough to get me by. But am I? It seems not. I have moved to my eldest sons town to be nearby for the birth of my first grand baby. I started working again within a job with other staff, I am here but not. Work goes well when I a man having short interactions with the patrons, I'm cheerful and helpful, but I am having difficulties with some of thr staff, I don't feel I'm a part of them. The birth of my grandchild coinciding with the move to a new place where I know no one opened up huge grief for me. I was happy for my son, but hurt so much for the son who would never meet this child or hold his own. Corey was the son who was closest to me and who wanted a family, while my eldest son was more focused on his own passions. Oh god how complicated it all is. Each day I bury my feelings, I am happy grandma, cheerful coworker, helpful mother in law, but no one ever wants to hear how it is for me or see the real me. The half brain, half heart, half finished me. Thankful to have this forum to express this. Thank you to anyone who shares here. 

Comment by Teresa D. on November 30, 2019 at 9:43pm
Julie, my deepest condolences. My heart is with you. Hugs
Comment by Dolly on August 19, 2019 at 9:19pm

Do we ever stop having those days that seem just like the day it all happened? when nothing else seems real and all we feel is the pain again? does it ever just not happen any more? 

Comment by Teresa D. on August 19, 2019 at 10:07am

Connie I'm sorry but just know your words do stay in my head.

Keven's mom...I'm so sorry that phone came.  There's nothing I can say or do to make this easier on you.  Just know we know exactly how you feel.  Your son will live on forever through you. 

Comment by Connie K on August 9, 2019 at 6:32pm

Teresa D.

the line is "Mama  don't you cry for me, I'm sailing in eternity..."

Makes me feel emotional and happy that it resonates with you and that you remember it. <3

Comment by Connie K on August 9, 2019 at 6:28pm

Kevin's mom I am so terribly sorry for your devastating loss. I lost my only child as well - Daniel - at age 17. That was 6 and a half years ago. I can't tell you how i made it through, but I have, one day at a time sometimes one minute at a time. We are not alone and I hope you can find support and help here in this group. Hugs and prayers to you and your family. xtra Prayers for his children .

Jesse's mom thanks for sharing your friends poems. When I use something i will let you know! Sorry for the late reply . Hugs and love  Connie

 

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M Adams commented on Mel Royer's blog post Dark Night and Day of the Soul
"So sorry to hear of your experience with aphasia...how scary and awful! Don’t know if this is what you meant by almost comedic but there is definitely a nasty black humour vibe to inflicting that problem on a radio broadcaster of all people,…"
11 hours ago
morgan commented on Mel Royer's blog post Dark Night and Day of the Soul
"Thanks for checking in Mel.  I had to look up aphasia.  I would hazard a guess that your neural system has taken a beating from your grief and your brain just wants to shut down.  I know I have times where I stutter during a breakdown…"
yesterday
morgan left a comment for Susan Bishop
"Susan B,  I am so sorry.  To try and live without that person who was by your side for 52 years is a living nightmare.  I had 35 married years but 55 of knowing him (since second grade).  That much history buries the person left…"
yesterday
dream moon JO B posted photos
yesterday
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"not bean a grt wk on pepple passin i no plu  plus near dads anvers 10 or 9 daysi am i no its bean 8 yrs "
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Bluebird, Thanks for your kind post. I feel the same as you about getting another pet. No other dog could ever take her place and no man could ever take the place of My Dear Husband, Julian. As with you, I don't want to face anymore deaths…"
yesterday
Mel Royer posted a blog post

Dark Night and Day of the Soul

Hello Morgan, Bluebird, Linda at al. I'm sorry it has been so awfully long since my last contact.  A Year? I have always read the posts, though and have felt the same horrible burning pain I have the last, nearly 5 years since Nancy left me. I have had a couple of tia's including a lengthy bout of "aphasia". It was almost comedic as I couldn't talk but kept trying to tell the emt's which hospital to drop me at. This year, I have come to the concludion will be my year, 2020 will be the year I…See More
yesterday
Susan Bishop is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I feel the same as both of you. morgan, I'm sorry you had a particularly bad day -- I certainly know what that's like. I hope today is easier for you. Linda, I know what you mean about your dog. When our cat died, aside from the sadness I…"
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Morgan, I just wish I could have died with Julian. Like you, everyday I just go through motions. I am blessed with my Sweet Dog, Babie J. I am living for her. She now has dementia and it is so sad to watch her declining. She has been by side…"
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Amen Linda.......Today for whatever reason was a particularly rough day.  I am exhausted from crying.   I just don't know how long I can keep pushing forward.  I am definitely in the hate mode......."
Saturday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
Friday
Martee replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Maybe open yourself up, try to ride that love and passion I see in you. You loved your husband so deeply, focus on that. Maybe we are still here because we need to evolve a bit more or do something that God wants us to do. looking back I feel you…"
Friday
Martee replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Exactly If We are wrong we won’t know it, but we do know that we are energy (souls), basic physics says energy cannot be destroyed. Anything is better than existing here in this void!"
Friday
Martee replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"If you focus on the light and the good, that’s is God! I have felt it, I don’t know anything about plans or why people get taken before others but I do know that wherever that next realm  is I’m ready to go I am not…"
Friday
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"That's great that you have no doubt about the existence of an afterlife. I doubt there's a god, but if there is one I'm not convinced it's a loving God, as it allowed my husband to die young(-ish) and one week after our wedding.…"
Friday
Jeff C replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Morgan, Over the years I have thought that Bluebird gets it much more than almost everyone who has written about this - at least from my point of view. At the root of this, I think, it's the absence of their presence that hurts so much.  I…"
Friday
Martee replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"bluebird I can’t help but hold out hope in reading all these entries from people that some of them made it to the next realm. That is the reason we don’t hear from some anymore, because they passed on with with their loved ones.  I…"
Thursday
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Thank you, Joe. It does help a little bit."
Thursday
morgan replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Jeff,  Amazing isn't it?  I keep asking myself how it is I could still hurt so much from having my husband no longer with me on this earthly plane.  Not because I don't know it isn't possible but more, what is it that…"
Thursday

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