Missing my Son or Daughter

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Missing my Son  or  Daughter

For all of us that are suffering the loss a son or daughter.

Members: 433
Latest Activity: Feb 10

Discussion Forum

Please share your Story = the Loss of your Son or Daughter 463 Replies

Started by Karen. Last reply by Pearl Irene Jul 19, 2017.

STUPID things people say... " Vent Here " 180 Replies

Started by Karen. Last reply by Kellie Hull Nov 9, 2017.

Lost Faith 58 Replies

Started by cindy parrott. Last reply by Dennis C. Jun 27, 2015.

The HOW ARE YOU dreaded Question ???? How do you answer??? 48 Replies

Started by Karen. Last reply by Ross Hotard Dec 17, 2014.

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Comment by Dolly on February 10, 2018 at 10:10am

for the past few months me and my husband have been having awful panic attacks and my husband was unable to sleep since after Thanksgiving... he would wake up off and on covered in fear.. and cold sweat... we finally got some meds to help calm us down but we've been wrecks... has anyone else had such a sudden unexplained plunge into the horrible depths so many years after their child died?  Before the meds it felt just like it did the days right after Brandon died... maybe even worse.. because at first I was in shock and not feeling much of anything but numb... and delerious... and this latest free fall into the depths has left us in shambles emotionally and physically... this is Brandon's birthday month too... I don't come on here often anymore because I feel like I've said it all so many times and don't want to add any sorrow to anyone in here.. but then here it comes AGAIN... just like at first... and I'm so aware of being OUT OF IT... and hanging on... and I don't know WHY...

Comment by B.Windsor on February 6, 2018 at 5:50pm

My heart continues to ache for all who have lost or/and continue to lose loved ones.  It is truly a heavy burden.  *Much love to you all!  Thank you--those who work for the site and comment and just keep going!  

i just wanted to share a brief update.  This past weekend, we traveled a few hours each way, so i could meet my grandson--finally.  It was a bit weird, since both his father and grandfather believed i was there to try to take Gabriel, and not simply visit.  (i'd tried calling several times, throughout January, as well as the first day of February, without anyone answering the phone.  *sigh)  So, i broke it down to them both, and made sure they understood my stance.  Needless to say, we visited for a few hours, and all i can truly say about my grandson:  He's his mother's child!  And, he's a trough of energy--not just a bowlful!  He looks so much like her, too.  i just hope they can keep at least some of their "word," since i've not had the best experience with that, as of yet.  

Comment by Judy Pugh on January 15, 2018 at 6:56pm

I’m so sorry Virginia. Life is so hard after a loss such as ours. Just know there are many people who understand your pain, people you will never meet but who have gone through this anguish you are feeling. You will make it through, please be gentle with yourself. 

Comment by Virginia on January 15, 2018 at 11:23am

I lost my beautiful daughter on 12/21/17.  I don't know what else to say, I think that says it all.  I am sad beyond belief. I don't want to be at home, I don't want to go to work.  Being around people is hard: either they don't talk to me because they don't know what to say, or they just want to tell me how sorry they are which makes me cry.  I feel I am neglecting my son, but it is so hard to play with him and try to have fun, when I am thinking of my daughter every minute of every day.

Comment by Bern on January 1, 2018 at 9:41pm

Here we are another year and no sons...Life is so changed. I just can not log in daily, it became overwhelming.

Comment by Dolly on January 1, 2018 at 1:29pm

here we go again... first thing today I got an message that my son Bo is being kicked out of a group for people with CP... because they say I'm the one 'talking' for him.. well he can't speak but a couple of words, and can't type so its me asking questions about what he wants to say and if he says 'uh huh' i type it in.. but now that's not going to fly I guess.. I'm just so tired of this world... I want to go Home..

Comment by B.Windsor on January 1, 2018 at 1:06pm

It's hard enough trying to go on since Shelby died...but, the mess my ex and his mother keep pulling really don't help anything/anyone.  *sigh  i've second-guessed every step i've ever made, since her death, and it's not getting ANY easier.  i came back to NC to try and reconnect with my son, as well as visit some with my grandson, and get to know him.  i've called my son--spoke to him briefly, before the call dropped--and texted him to let him know i'm in the state and whenever he's ready to talk, i should be around.  (He's in the military now.)  My grandson's father has answered the phone once, in the many times i've tried calling him, these past several months.  He asked me to call back the following day, since they would be there the whole time.  He did not answer.  i tried the following day.  No answer.  i've even tried since, knowing my grandson is with my ex, just to see what's going on or if he's having reservations or what his deal is.  All i keep thinking:  he's partying and using, still.  My grandson deserves a better life than that.  i don't want to create any tidal waves, but if he is using, something HAS to change. As i'm writing this, i'm looking out the window....It's a beautiful cold day, but, my mind goes elsewhere.  i'm tired.  i'm fed up with all the games people play.  No one seems capable of keeping their word anymore.  *sigh  Most people just can't get it, nor give a hoot about trying.  But, no matter how much i do or plead, she's never coming back--she is dead, after all.  God, that  hurts....i still can't take her off my contact lists.  i know if or when i do, it'll be a definite finality.  Just wish i could give up and let go and forget about this world.  All it's ever done for me is cause me more pain and suffering.  

Comment by Dolly on December 23, 2017 at 10:23pm

here we are again... Christmas without our darlings... I almost never come in here anymore because all I can say I have already said over and over...  I find some comfort in music.. playing music on my little Q chord.. and instrument 'real' musicians often scoff at but one that has helped save my sanity... but life for us has changed so drastically since Brandon died and my husband began his fight for life from cancer... every day is a combination of thankfulness for another day and fear that tomorrow may bring bad news... we fight it ... we deny that we have fear.. but its not true...  the only thing I know to do anymore is to make myself focus on whatever good I can find in every day and put the rest of this mess of a world OUT of my thoughts... I can't dwell on my losses or my fears or I am gone... but the price I pay is mult-faceted.. weight gain, depression, anger, sleeplessness, self doubt, such anxiety greater than ever before... this is a reason I don't come here often... I'm too depressing... I wish I had words for all of us .. that would say we will get over or through this fog that just smacked us all upside the head one day... but so far I haven't found the answer .. I've turned to God for help but I can tell this isn't going to be an easy fix... this is going to hurt.. and hurt some more... My heart is with you all.... those who know me and those poor unfortunate new people I see in here today... I know that doesn't help.. but its true...

we do care and we do understand.. because 'you' are 'us' too..

Comment by Teresa D. on December 23, 2017 at 8:43am

Judy, I lost my son Michael and yet I still can't imagine the grief you must feel.  It's hard to say Merry Christmas but I hope you find a second of peace. 

it's been a while since I've been here.  For my old friends my daughters ovarian cancer is stage 1.  To me it's not good but it's the best of the worst. 

I've bonded very strongly with one of our members, so much so we visited this summer.  Now I can't live without her, she is my sister now. 

For me it's like you run out of words. You repeat yourself so much you get sick of yourself.  I do anyway. 

When I first started this room was very active and the people in it (except for Dennis) supported me like others couldn't and for that I will never forget any of you.

I'm 5 years in and have no words of wisdom for anyone.  Early on I was told you'll learn to wear a fake face and you'll learn to manage it.  Those things yes, I'm doing today.  It was a process to get there and I have not mastered either one.  Sometimes that fake face starts to crack. 

I still cry daily, sometimes with no warning, but it's now normal to me.  This is who I am now.

I love you all and I hope through the holidays everyone can find one moment of peace.

Comment by Teresa D. on December 23, 2017 at 8:34am

Dennis I mean no disrespect however you have been asked numerous times to leave this group.  You have not lost a child not do you have any clue what we experience.  Last time your words were so inappropriate you were pushed from this room.  While your intentions might be good they are not welcomed.  Please respect what we keep telling you.  Stop prying on our grief.

 

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Jenni H posted a blog post

Totally tired of my life and lack of emotions.

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Jamie added a discussion to the group Multiple Losses Group
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I'm new here and going through a very hard time.

Hello everyone. I'm new to this site.I lost my grandfather in June of 2017. A few weeks later, my grandmother passed away. My grandmother and I were very close. She was more of a mother to me than a grandmother. It was very hard on me. Only three months after the death of my grandma, on December 18th of 2017, my father passed away very suddenly and unexpectedly. I never got to say goodbye. I lost the three most important people in my life within a few short months and I am having a very hard…See More
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Jamie joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
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Multiple Losses Group

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Jenni H commented on Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group Lost Without My Mom
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Jenni H joined Julie Dolsey-Weiss's group
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Lost Without My Mom

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Raven Richardson posted a blog post

I'm so hurt

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Kyle McKay replied to Kyle McKay's discussion Lost my wife in the group Lost My Spouse...
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Darien replied to Suzette Laree Arch's discussion 4 months and I can't stop crying in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
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Rhonda Robinson left a comment for Michele Huddleston
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B.Windsor posted a blog post

it's been one year

Tomorrow, it'll be one year since Shelby died. No matter how things seem at any given time, the darkness has set in.  i just can't shake it.  i've continued having physical issues going on, and haven't been able to get in to see the doctor, yet--my appointment is for Monday.  i'm tired of trying to keep going.  i still haven't even begun to work on the planning of Shelby's going away party, yet, either.  *sigh  At this point, my hope is that once i can get straightened out, or at least find out…See More
Thursday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Mine as well."
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Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"TTo My Husband Julian"
Wednesday

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