I found that venting some of the stupid things people say with others that hear them as well helped me with some of the frustration. We know they mean well but, Dont you just want to scream sometimes..... So lets Vent - Go for It..... Lets hear them----

Views: 6649

Replies to This Discussion

The only ones who understand my pain are people like you who've been through this and are still managing to breath in and out.

I hate when people say I'm sorry. What are you sorry for. Just don't say anything at all.

Kelly, when people say they are sorry, they simply don't know what to say. They have never experienced what you have. They never want to. They are struck with fear of the same happening to them and the gut wrenching imagining of that experience to them, or to you by proxy. I was once told, before the funeral for my son, that those who say "I'm sorry" feel your pain, but cannot bear very much of it and cannot express it in any other way. So they carry a tiny amount of your pain for you. It is the only thing they can do to try to help.

My mom asked me how I was doing on the morning of my sons funeral. I said that this was the second worst day of my life, (the worst being discovering my son dead and attempting CPR.) My MOM said, "well, he's already dead." I have no idea why that came out of her mouth. I Told her that I was burying my son today, and that made it the second worst. She did realize the absolute stupidity that she had spouted about two seconds earlier. I saw it in her face. I still can't believe it. My own mom.

My sister flew in from California for the funeral. She kept going on about her two kids. We have one two year old and lost our 17 day old son. She kept saying things like, "As soon as (older sister) tries something, (younger sister) has to try it." "I'm so glad my kids love being sisters." She said multiple things like this. She has a doctorate and is a counselor. You would think she would have some idea.

RSS

Groups

Latest Activity

Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Danny. Surviving is art which we all need to practice. Today I met a friend whose father is witnessing the similar illness as my mother i.e. late stage cancer. He is also going through the same emotional turmoil as I went in 2018. After this…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Danny. I hear you.  December will be 4 years "
yesterday
Danny replied to Carla Rose's discussion Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago in the group Lost Without My Mom
"Great reply Sandra"
yesterday
Danny updated their profile
yesterday
Danny commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Its been 5 years and here I am back on the site. Surviving and functioning but just about. "
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Wonderful Avi!!!  "
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Amen, Avi."
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks all. This group is my extended family. "
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, that is so lovely to hear — best wishes to her and your family!"
Friday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"That's wonderful, Avi. Congratulations. And I wish you another 100 years with her."
Friday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am so happy for you & your family.  I am glad your daughter had a great birthday!  That first birthday is always special.  Take care, "
Friday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All,  Friends, my daughter's first bday celebration went great. She is now 1 year old and motivating force for my dad to live. My dad is able to laugh and enjoy life because of his grand daughter. Even I feel motivated to live so that I…"
Friday
Stephanie Berndt is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
Judy Pugh left a comment for Kevin's Mom
"You are still Kevin’s mom, and you always will be. NOTHING, not even death, can change that. I don’t know what your beliefs are, and I’m not trying to shove my beliefs onto you. I just want you to know that I truly believe this is…"
Aug 10
Connie K commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Teresa D. the line is "Mama  don't you cry for me, I'm sailing in eternity..." Makes me feel emotional and happy that it resonates with you and that you remember it. <3"
Aug 9
Connie K commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Kevin's mom I am so terribly sorry for your devastating loss. I lost my only child as well - Daniel - at age 17. That was 6 and a half years ago. I can't tell you how i made it through, but I have, one day at a time sometimes one minute at…"
Aug 9
Gale Brunault commented on Gale Brunault's group Loss of an Only Child
"I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your precious son. Why do bad things happen to good people? We may never find the answers.......please know that you are not alone. "
Aug 9
Holycow updated their profile
Aug 9
Kevin's Mom commented on Gale Brunault's group Loss of an Only Child
"I lost my 32 yr old son, my only child, on July 10 2019. He was killed in a motorcycle accident. My heart is shattered and my life will never be the same. This is life's most cruel event."
Aug 9
Kevin's Mom joined Gale Brunault's group
Thumbnail

Loss of an Only Child

As bereaved parents we must deal with unique issues that accompany losing an only child. See More
Aug 9

© 2019   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service