Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Patty on July 15, 2017 at 12:18pm

Mona, I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter.  We lost our daughter as well because of a drunk driver.  She is our only child.  My life basically ended that day.  Like Rhiannon, Caitlin was the passenger.  In our case it was a motorcycle, not a car.  She was 20 when it happened and away at college.  It took 2 years to go to trial.  We offered 5 years which the driver turned down.  He ended up getting 90 days shock time and 5 years probation with electronic alcohol monitoring.  It was such a slap in the face.  5 years for taking a life.  I pray your trial and outcome goes better than ours.  By better I mean the driver gets more jail time, of course.  Be prepared because whatever you have heard or seen so far may pale in comparison to what you may hear or see at the trial.  I thought I had seen and heard it all but there was more.  It was truly terrible to hear those things when they are talking about your child.  Also, people lied on the stand to cover their sorry asses.  In my victim impact statement I said that "I might as well have been on the back of that motorcycle with Caitlin because when you killed her you killed me too."  I still feel that way after 7 years.  I will be praying for you.

Permalink Reply by Pearl Irene on July 19, 2017 at 9:21pm

I lost my son Dalton, June 16, 2017. He was riding his Motorcycle, lost control and hit a concrete light pole. He died instantly. He was quite a character, one of a kind. He was the warrior for the underdog, a sponge for any type of knowledge (though dyslexic and basically illiterate), up for any prank, loved children and animals. He was always bringing home strays, whether animal or human. It seems his life was just coming together. He had a dream job at Harley Davidson, and a new bike. He loved that bike. He had made amends with his big brother, they had never gotten along before. They were even living together. He had a new girlfriend and they were serious. He was getting the opportunity to try his hand at stand up comedy. Everything was coming together. And now he is gone. Why? I miss him terribly.
I am not a stranger to sadness, but this is beyond what I had previously experienced. I wonder if there will be a day when I wake up and not be in utter despair. Will I ever experience joy again? I live in fear that my youngest son will die from an overdose. In fact I was sure it would happen at one time. I planned his funeral in my head. When the police showed up to tell me about Dalton's death, I assumed they were there about Cole. They were always there for Cole. Cole is clean at the moment (5 months), but it only takes one mistake. Cole has actually been my rock during all of the planning of viewing and memorial. He even delivered a beautiful eulogy he had written for his brother. He always idolized Dalton. Their father died several years ago, so they have all endured their share of losses. Praying for healing and peace.

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Permalink Reply by Lori G. on June 12, 2018 at 8:44am

Is this still an active group?

Permalink Reply by Ammy on June 14, 2018 at 6:59pm

Hi Lori.  I received an email that you joined this group and since I haven't been here in quite qwhile I decided to check on the group.  I am surprised that there has not been any activity.  WhenI came here almost 8 years ago this group was very active.  I only check in a couple of times a year now as most of the moms that were here when I started have left.
Try posting on the main wall by introducing yourself.  I'm sure you will get a response.
I'm very sorry you have had to come to this site.  I know what it's like, but do the best you can.  It's a lifetime journey.
My son's birthday is today so it has been a rough week but it does get kinder.
If you need someone to talk to leave a comment on the wall or on my page and I will try and get back to you.
Hugs to you.

Permalink Reply by toni m dicarlo on June 17, 2018 at 12:43pm

I haven't posted in awhile. May 26 was the 7 year date of my sons death and June 2 would have been his 23rd birthday, Gabriel was kind thoughtful and a pure joy to everyone he met. this life and the grieving have been very cyclical and when I feel the sadness and fear lift it comes back without much warning. when holidays approach I say I am going to be ok this time but the physical a and mental stress slowly come back. I am so grateful and thank God every day for letting me have him and in the last  couple of years I remember the funny kooky stuff he did and laugh out loud and I feel the weight on my chest lifted. Gabes dog Emma died 6 months ago at 15 and I love the thought of then running and laughing like they did for years. I love you peapod.

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