Information

Lost Without My Mom

My mom died, August 17, 2009 of an apparent heart attack from heart failure. Her doctors never told me how sick she was and so I was blown away and am heart sick and lost without her.

Members: 249
Latest Activity: Aug 17

Discussion Forum

Lost my Mom a Few Days Ago 7 Replies

Hi, I'm new around here. My mother passed away on Saturday February 6th, very suddenly and unexpectedly. We were in touch every day, via text, e-mail and phone calls, and we saw each other every…Continue

Started by Carla Rose. Last reply by Danny Aug 17.

Also missing my Mom. 9 Replies

I can relate to almost everything I read here.....I lost my Mom on 9/24/2017.  We lived together since 2008.  I became her primary care giver in 2011 after she broke her hip.  She developed Dementia…Continue

Started by Jennifer Nuss. Last reply by Rhonda Robinson Apr 2, 2018.

Missing my mom 23 Replies

Hi! I'm a new member. My name is Emily. My mom died Dec 27,2012. I had a question for anyone in the group............. Does anyone ever feel torn-part of them wants to be with friends but the other…Continue

Started by Emily. Last reply by Kelli Jan 2, 2018.

Missing my Mom so very much 7 Replies

My Mom was my best friend and the greatest mother you could ever ask for. I still can't believe she passed away and it's only been eight months but it still feels like yesterday. I always told my Mom…Continue

Started by Renee Rugenstein. Last reply by Debbie Lynn Hallstrom Feb 28, 2017.

Comment Wall

Comment

You need to be a member of Lost Without My Mom to add comments!

Comment by Nancy on August 10, 2015 at 10:09am

My mother died February 15, 2015.  Her 89th birthday was February 2nd.  I am misunderstood in my grief.  I was 65 as of July 16th.  I am therefore considered to be "too old" to miss my mother.  No one grieves for Mother except me.  I am driven into silence. 

Comment by Bela on August 6, 2015 at 4:37pm

So true about holding onto scraps of paper with lists or  memos from Mum but I never see them as silly, they are deeply precious and priceless. Yes the handwriting just melts the heart. I miss my Mum every moment. And its been nearly four months. I love you always Mummy, my angel, my heart xx

Comment by Jenny Renn on July 29, 2015 at 6:20pm

Sorry, I won't take up too much more of your time - Just to say, I hold onto silly things that my Mom had like a scrap of paper that she wrote her shopping list on.  To see her handwriting melts my heart.  You realize that you will never see a birthday or special occasion card from your parent again.  It's heartbreaking.  I do not mean for you prolong your daughter's pain but for me, a book of thoughts from my Mom would be wonderful. 

Anyway Pauline, I wish you much strength and many more years with your loved ones.  Take care x

Comment by Jenny Renn on July 29, 2015 at 6:16pm

Hi Pauline, I have been meaning to send you a message since I first read your note and I am sorry it has taken a while to write.  You message moved me so much.  First, I understand your pain about missing your Mom as mine passed on in January 2014, nearly 5 months after my Dad passed on.  My little boy was just 3 weeks old when he passed.  It has been a rollercoaster of emotions.  As a daughter, I had at the back of my head the fact that my parents were older than my friend's parents.  My Mom was 40 and my Dad 50 when I was born.  Considering all of their health issues they didn't do too badly but that doesn't take away the pain of missing them everyday and feeling the massive void that can never be filled.  I think that I will always feel as you have, that I will always have the urge to call my Mom when something good or bad happens, to ask if she wants me to get her anything from the shops.  My Dad was on dialysis for the last 5 years of his life so there was a lot of hospital and doctors visits, lots of calling consultants and doctors to check that things were in order.  My mother had chronic heart and kidney failure too and so it was the same with her.  I am glad that I was there though to be with them.  I am very fortunate, I am self employed with my husband and we moved to the same town as my parents so I got to see them daily and was able to go to the majority of appointments.  As I daughter, I would say that having her Mother or Father under the same roof is a blessing.  I know that a lot of people would not be able to do that and I understand that but if you are very blessed to be able to get on with your parent the majority of the time (and vice versa) then you have already made your daughter's future feeling of loss a little better as she will think, 'at least I had that time with Mom'.  That is what I would think anyway.  My husbands parents are actually moving in with us (we have moved into a new house and building works are underway) as they are elderly and need some assistance and they do not want to go into a nursing home.  We do not want them to either.  I know that at times it may be trying but it is a gift that my husband gets to spend this time with his parents.  I know that when the time comes, he will appreciate the time he had with them. 

I read once about Mindy Kaling, the actress/comedian, talk about the passing of her Mother.  From the moment she was diagnosed with breast cancer Mindy left the show she was working to be with her Mother.  She said that everyone thought that she would have a couple of years but unfortunately it was aggressive and she lived for another 8 months.  During that time Mindy would sit with her Mom with a notebook and pen and asked her Mom about every question she could possibly think of and wrote down her Mom's advise.  I thought that this was amazing.  My mother passed on quite rapidly and I wish I had asked her more things, written down her recipes for my favourite foods that she used to cook.  Asked her more about her past, her childhood etc.  I wonder, if you haven't done it already, if writing a journal or a book of Mom's memories, keepsakes and advice might be of comfort to her?  Since my parent's passing I have found a few photographs that I did not know existed.  One is of my Mom holding me in a car.  I don't know how old I was, where we were etc., but things like that are so great when you find them.  If you had photographs that you could include with notes about the day, about how you felt and any other memories that you can recollect would be so amazing.  Advice though, you can't beat your Mom's advice.  Even small things like how to budget your shopping properly (maybe a bad example) or anything really, even if it seems trivial.  continued..

Comment by Pauline Bailey-Dawes on July 23, 2015 at 10:59pm

There is nothing more devastating than the loss of your mother , especially for a woman.  I lost my amazing Mother 25 years ago--yes, 25 years ago--and I have never gotten over missing her.  Does it ruin my life or even effect me on a daily basis?  No.  But I still think "Oh, I need to call Mom!" when something good happens; or "Oh, geez--I really need to talk to Mom." when something bad happens.  And then that overwhelming sense of loss hits me and I have to choke back tears.  With time, I have learned to accept these emotions.  But now I am in fear for my daughter.  I have MS and my health is failing.  I am now crippled, with congestive heart failure, and in constant pain.  None of that really matters to me, as long as my daughter's life is good.  She and I are even closer than my Mother and I were, so I am afraid for her when I go.  We lost her Dad last year, and she was devastated;  she and I are closer than they were.  I now share a house with her and her family (husband and 2 precious kids) and we are all very happy together.  We have worked out the kinks and dealt with the little annoyances that can make life miserable; we are a family.  And I am there for my daughter 24/7 and that scares me for the future.  I am terrified that when she loses me, she will fall apart.  So I feel it is the last of my obligations to her as her Mother to find some way to make that future easier for her--and I just don't know how...Is there any way to do that?  Is it even possible?  What do I do? 

Comment by Jayne on July 9, 2015 at 10:13pm

everyday without my mom not physically here is heartbreaking. I try to enjoy everyday , it it so hard. keeping busy helps for a temporary fix so I try and keep as busy as I can.

Comment by Danny on March 3, 2015 at 9:07am

Its tough Tina and as the second year begins, it sort of gets a bit tougher as there is no history of the month in the previous year. Trying to function individually is how I am doing it too.  I stopped feeling bad about people not understanding as they are not grief specialists.

Comment by Tina on March 3, 2015 at 1:06am

Today is the one year anniversary of my mother's death. She died from  blood cancer that she was fighting for 3 years. This week has been particularly hard since it is the start of my second year without her. I am know aware of how much my family and I did have not talked about our grief. We just try to function and live our lives individually. My world still feels torn apart and I feel that no one understands the pain.  

Comment by Jennifer L Gebhardt on February 2, 2015 at 9:25am

There is a feeling that overwhelms you when you lose your mom. My mom moved in with me in 2010 after finding out she had breast cancer. Everything was fine until last year. She passed away October 16th after a great fight. Me, my home and my family will never be the same. Miss her every minute! My heart goes out to all of you!

Comment by pushpa on February 2, 2015 at 9:11am

My mom was assaulted by unknown assailants in her bedroom.

16th January 2014 . . . . .An Act of brutality by unknown assailants in the face of a JUVENILE ,  completely changed our life . . .

 

Around 4 pm my father found my beloved MOTHER in a pool of blood in her bedroom. Mother, a religious lady, full of life and vigour, was hospitalized with severe head injury (multiple skull fracture) caused by some blunt object.

She remained unconscious for around 30 days . . . the most disturbing days of our life. She continued her battle for life with life support medical equipment. With her sheer willpower she came out of coma and gradually started speaking. Finally the day came when she was discharged (though paralyzed and completely bedridden) from hospital only to be mercilessly snatched away in next few days. The brave lady battled for life for long and departed for heavenly abode on 2nd March 2014 

 

Members (248)

 
 
 

Latest Activity

dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"evry now agan i still loss my way i do"
Thursday
Kim Darichuk is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Sep 11
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Today we Remember 9/11. I can't even imagine the terror and heartbreak the families must still have. Losing my Husband Julian under normal circumstances was bad enough.  God Bless all the people that still suffer from this horrible…"
Sep 11
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear Morgan, Thanks so very much for your supportive letter. Sorry i didn't see it before. I replied to it just now, Sending you love and good wishes."
Sep 10
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you friends for sharing your thoughts. I don't know what I do, if I didn't have this place to come to. We are all suffering and the real world just doesn't understand what we are going through. I miss the tender touch of my…"
Sep 10
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I have nothing that I want to or have to, to keep me busy except doing what I'm doing which has to have something to do with Her.  Like yesterday, I found a small  3/4 X 2 1/2 inch bottle with a cork when I went to the dollar store…"
Sep 9
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Trina, Check your inbox for a message from me. Joe,  So true.  That's exactly why I post here too.  I keep thinking if I get it off my chest and out into cyberspace at least I know I wont be suffering alone.  That consoles…"
Sep 9
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello All, I am sorry that I have not posted here for a while now to show my support for you. On August 4th it was the fifth anniversary of Joseph's passing. I just don't have the strength or energy anymore to keep pushing to survive each…"
Sep 9
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I'm in the 19th month and don't know what to say, except that the only time I'm not living this horrible nightmare is when I sleep and don't dream at all.  Even when I post in a way to try to console anyone here, in a way,…"
Sep 9
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, Once again I want to Thank You for sharing you thoughts with us. You put into words the things I don't know how to express."
Sep 9
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I don't mean to be a downer, but I am not sure there is an end to our grief. I know mine is still going strong. I wish the good things in my life were as consistent as this is. We have to keep moving though. Keep taking baby steps. Assay…"
Sep 8
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John T,   I saw your post late late last night.  I see you are still doing your best to cope. I remember a time that I wasn't even coping. I was barely standing.  After six years seven months I have become anesthetized.…"
Sep 8
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All, Today I suddenly had grief all over the day. I miss my mother a lot and it seems that there is no end to this grief. Hope I meet her someday when I leave this world.  Just wanted to share my feelings here because people around me…"
Sep 8
Profile IconBev R, Kelly Darnell and Wil McGregor joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Sep 8
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"John, We are blessed to have this wonderful group to come to and share our grief."
Sep 8
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thinking of you John T.  I understand.  "
Sep 7
John T. replied to Elynn m's discussion Lonely again
"5 years since my wife died suddenly of heart failure right in front of me.  The time since that day has been just awful and when I reached this anniversary, I just couldn't believe it.  All I think about is all the years ahead without…"
Sep 7
John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Yesterday was the 5th anniversary of the death of my wife.  I spent the day unable to believe it has been 5 years but somewhat surprised at how well I handled the day.  Today I have kept having outbursts of crying and overwhelming memories…"
Sep 7
Emmyk replied to Amy R's discussion So many questions in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"That is horrific for you. Im so sorry. Just know yoy aren't alone. Know we dont think you are some kind of monster and know that we validate what you guys had and the love that existed there. Try not to fixate on the particulars that you have…"
Sep 4
Joe Kelly left a comment for Maria
"Maria, The only comfort I can possibly provide is that your mother and father are blissfully reunited eternally in spirit.  I lost my wife to cancer over 18 months ago.  We were together since age 16 and would had celebrated our 50th…"
Sep 3

© 2019   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service