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Lost My Spouse...

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Lost my wife 14 Replies

It's been almost a week since i lost my wife to lung disease. She's in my mind 24/7. I don't have anybody else to talk too. I was carred by emotional and physical abuse mostly in my childhood in…Continue

Started by Kyle McKay. Last reply by Corinne C. Rico yesterday.

Lost my husband the father of my kids and bestfriend . 3 Replies

  I lost my husband we were high school sweethearts we had plans and it was not suppose to be this way we had two kids together and I feel so lost and the pain i feel becuase of how much I miss him…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Fran Oct 19.

FAILING 9 Replies

next month will be three years since I lost my husband and I'm failing miserably I am in serious debt I cant fix, I stay home because I have extreme difficulty leaving my house I don't know how to…Continue

Started by Pamela philipp. Last reply by Corinne C. Rico Oct 4.

Lost my husband the father of my kids and bestfriend . 3 Replies

  I lost my husband we were high school sweethearts we had plans and it was not suppose to be this way we had two kids together and I feel so lost and the pain i feel becuase of how much I miss him…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Nicole Sep 28.

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Comment by Trina Mamoon on October 18, 2018 at 6:52pm

Comment by bluebird on October 18, 2018 at 5:51pm
I understand, Linda. It's the same for me. ((((Hugs))))
Comment by Linda Engberg on October 18, 2018 at 4:19pm

Here I am at a another Holiday Season coming up. All it is, is my six Christmas without my beloved Husband. I was always told time will make things better, I guess these people never knew what a true soulmate is. I feel the same way I did six years ago and it will never get better for me. All I do is hope that I will never awaken again and join him. Most people just don't get it.

Comment by Linda Engberg on October 18, 2018 at 4:19pm

Here I am at a another Holiday Season coming up. All it is, is my six Christmas without my beloved Husband. I was always told time will make things better, I guess these people never knew what a true soulmate is. I feel the same way I did six years ago and it will never get better for me. All I do is hope that I will never awaken again and join him. Most people just don't get it.

Comment by Linda Engberg on September 27, 2018 at 3:05pm

Hi Alexis,

Loved reading her book, after 5 years found this book more down to earth that the grief never goes away

Comment by ALEXIS on September 27, 2018 at 12:05pm
Linda,
I am currently reading that book and am finding it to be helpful. I feel like I can identify with the author and appreciate the fact that she acknowledges that this sucks.
Alexis
Comment by Linda Engberg on September 27, 2018 at 7:33am

Hello Everyone,

I just finished the book "It's OK that your're not OK by Megan Devine. It really helped me to realize that this forum is the only place I find where I can share my grief with others and not be criticized. I am so thankful for everyone of you.

God Bless Everyone One of You.

Comment by Monty on September 25, 2018 at 5:50pm

Hi Jim

I'm so sorry for the pain and suffering your going though and can only imaging what life is like for you.

I also lost my wife of 25 years in December last year.

I am still pushing though the rut of life in most ways.

i am fortunate in some ways to have two children that need my support on a daily basis.

I also struggled to find something positive to do.

I have found these forums a big help and have and have recently joined a support group for widowers.

i don't know that there is one thing that works for every one. every one is going to have that little thing that makes a big difference.

for me it was the feeling of loneliness, when out of the circle of my wife's and my friends about 2 people kept in contact.

i felt alone and abandoned and angry.

i realised after  talking to my sister that they weren't avoiding me because my wife has died.  They were avoiding me because they didn't know how or were afraid to relate to someone who is in so much pain.

after coming to this conclusion, i didn't feel so isolated and angry. 

I now actively seek my friends out and and try to be the best i can for my self and children.

i also think for me getting out and going for walks, go for a swim when time permits helps me a lot.

It is still a daily struggle to continue to push though, and i think if it wasn't for my kids depending on me, i may roll up in a ball and cry but i cant.

i wish you all the support and best for you in this trying time.

best regards Monty

Comment by Jim Horvath on September 25, 2018 at 2:37pm

My wife and best friend of 33 years died from cancer recently.  We have a daughter.  I just wonder how people find anything happy and positive each day?  I started a journal where I try to write down little things that were good or positive.  I joined a local support group and that has been good too.  I know there is nothing anyone can do or say but what do people do to start feeling good again and keep moving ahead...?

Comment by Linda Engberg on September 13, 2018 at 3:03pm

Hi Joe,

I would have ended my life the day my Husband took his last breath, but the fear of not seeing him again because of my religious upbringing stops me and to this day I pray to God I don't wake up.

 

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Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear morgan, Linda, John, Joe, Denise, JenShep, Monty, and all Those Others reading this, I empathize with you all. My heart goes out to you! I think one of the reasons that others who have not lost a spouse do not understand us is because as Linda…"
45 minutes ago
Trina Mamoon commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear morgan, Linda, John, Joe, Denise, JenShep, Monty, and all Those Others reading this, I empathize with you all. My heart goes out to you! I think one of the reasons that others who have not lost a spouse do not understand us is because as Linda…"
52 minutes ago
Virginia G replied to mindy's discussion Feeling pretty well depressed
"What about your past?  I have so many regrets about mine.  I think about my whole life and everything I did wrong and how I want to do it over"
4 hours ago
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I am thinking God is trying to tell me I deserve to be alone.   Theresa I know the Doors but don’t like them.  Im old. And I think the penny was from your Mom. Brett, I liked your line, “honking load of crap”.   And…"
4 hours ago
mindy posted a discussion

Feeling pretty well depressed

My depression has been at it worse since I lost my grandpa it will be two years March 25th and my past bothers me alot too See More
12 hours ago
Kristen Harlow posted a discussion

Feeling alone

I’ve been through a lot. In 2014, my father became officially bedridden on Christmas day due to Frontotemporal dementia and my sister was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. She went through operations, a colostomy bag, and 6 months of chemo. In 2015, my husband’s play went to Broadway, and for that play he was nominated for a Tony award, as was the play itself, the playwright, and 3 of the actors.We went to the Tony award ceremony on June 7, and the next day, out of the blue, he told me he…See More
14 hours ago
Profile IconKristen Harlow, Susie A, Ginny Brown and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
14 hours ago
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"It isn't a secret how death affects many of us.  Its just avoided when the conversation comes up......For us it is as though we buried ourselves.  I think it is brave and necessary for those who have lost their beloved and still have…"
15 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Jen, You hit the nail on the head that all people on this site didn't have the kind of love we had with our spouses. They were our soulmates and we were as one."
16 hours ago
JenShep commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I haven't posted in a while but I'm still in the same boat I was last time I posted and to come back here and read others' posts that sound so much like what I'm still going through is a bit of a comfort.  Joe, like you I…"
17 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi John, I still have the car my Husband and  bought in 2003. I keep it in tip top shape because it is still part of him and brings me comfort. After almost six years I still attend the annual workshop "Hope for the Holidays" given by…"
19 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi I believe when you are talking to God your mom hears you she is right there. I also do not get any signals, but pay closer attention. I was praying to her one night because someone close to me is not well, and I said please mom help, please ask…"
23 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I also talk to God now at my home or in temple. It makes me feel that I am talking to my mom.  I did not receive any signals which make me feel that my mother is nearby but I still believe that she can listen me. "
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, I wish I could go to church with you. Church is very emotional for me. It's a combination of sadness and a feeling that I am close to my mom there. I cry a lot at church. Not out loud, but I try to sit in the back now. I don't…"
yesterday
John T. commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"A few days ago, our old car blew a head gasket on the freeway as I was on the way for a consultation with a doctor about skin cancer.  I am a baby about it even though it's not life-threatening.  Another of those times when I feel so…"
yesterday
Corinne C. Rico replied to Kyle McKay's discussion Lost my wife in the group Lost My Spouse...
"Kyle, all of us here are with you.  I am also Canadian now living in Uruguay.  I lost the love of my life in September of this year.  My Spanish is not great but I am being forced to get out there and learn, not easy, I hate every…"
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Joe, You are right about the U.S. culture, I am considered a weirdo because I haven't got over my Husband's death and I don't really care what they think. I think that they never had a love like my husband and I had. Thank God for…"
yesterday
Denise Lavoie commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi It has been2 and a half years sin ce l saw my husband. He died April 2016. I feel so lost and l have no hope."
yesterday
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Trying to think of a way to express my feelings is tough right now but reading all the posts, I'll try. To me, she isn't gone. She exists in a dimension spiritually just like I experienced back in the 80's with my OBE. She is with me…"
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hello Friends, I know it is going to be rough for all of us dealing again with the Holidays. Like Morgan I am tired of wearing my happy face, people think everything is okay and I have moved on. No, I have not moved on, everyday is pure Hell inside…"
yesterday

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