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Lost My Spouse...

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Latest Activity: on Monday

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Rejoining the rest of the world 3 Replies

I am getting ready to return to work for the first time since the death of John. I know I have to go on living for now. I have reflected on my spiritual beliefs. I have to believe that John is indeed…Continue

Started by Cristal. Last reply by Monty on Sunday.

FAILING 7 Replies

next month will be three years since I lost my husband and I'm failing miserably I am in serious debt I cant fix, I stay home because I have extreme difficulty leaving my house I don't know how to…Continue

Started by Pamela philipp. Last reply by Christopher Jul 23.

My wife passed 5 days before christmas 7 Replies

Hi AllMy name is Monty and i have become single parent of two special needs boys when i lost my wife and life partner of 25 years, 5 days before Christmas.My wife had Myotonic Dystrophy and other the…Continue

Started by Monty. Last reply by Monty Jul 8.

loost my spouce 4 Replies

Lost my spouce a couple of weeks ago and now what do I do with the rest of my life after 55 years with the same person?Continue

Started by kathy. Last reply by ET May 28.

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Comment by bluebird on April 3, 2018 at 7:24pm

joe kelly,

No more doctors for me, either. Nothing that will prolong this farcical hell of a "life".

Comment by joe kelly on April 3, 2018 at 4:20pm

I identify with so much said here.  It's been only ten weeks but seems like as the time passes it just gets worse.  I know that my mental state isn't very good but I too think that until I die, I'll be in agony.  Every minute of the day I think about her as though I'm waiting for her to somehow appear before me and the reality of that she is gone sinks in.  I can't seem to accept that.  I won't hurt my children or grandchildren by doing away with myself, but I can't wait till I go and hope we're together again.  No more doctors for me.

Comment by L.O on April 3, 2018 at 12:33pm

Hi all

Maxey i totally get you i feel lost without my partner, we live together for over 15years and did everything together. Iv recently come back from a holiday as i thought it would do the kids good to get away, it didn't do me any good though as i still came home to a lonely house. I just want to hear his voice and hold him, i felt guilty being away as he should have been there with us what with it being the younger twos first holiday. I cant see the light at the end of this dark tunnel but at the same time i know hed want me to take care of our kids as that was the one thing that he was afraid of, what with happen to them if we weren't here. My heart aches everyday and i find myself crying all the time, i don't even want to go out of the house but force myself to. I hate the silence the night brings when the kids are in bed when really he should be on the sofa talking about football or shouting at the TV for some silly reason, i hate the fact my 14 year old don't leave his room to be the first downstairs to watch telly anymore until he hears me moving about, i hate that he's lost half his friends as he wont leave me in fear of something happening to me too. I hate seeing the sadness in the younger ones eyes knowing i cant make they're pain go away or make it better, iv listened to them cry in their sleep asking for daddy to stay with us, 

People on the outside don't see all this and always comment about how well we are doing, well its easy to put a smile on your face for two minutes

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 30, 2018 at 4:39pm

Hi Nancy,

Thanks, ever year it just gets harder on us.

Comment by Nancy on March 30, 2018 at 10:24am

Very cute picture Linda!  It's so hard to not have them here.  

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 28, 2018 at 7:30am

If wasn't for the people on thls website, I would lose my mind. We are all in the same boat, this is my 5th Easter without my Husband and I choose to be alone with my thoughts of Easter past with him. Picture with his son Bob

Comment by Alice Thompson on March 28, 2018 at 2:52am

Hello to everyone in this group, I hope you are all managing to get through the continuing days and nights. I just wanted to say how I am comforted in my worst moments by knowing you are out there, knowing what this is like. If anyone had told me that you lose all your friends in this process too, I wouldn’t have believed life could be so cruel. But perhaps I’m exaggerating to try to express my pain. Perhaps it’s just that friendship feels so irrelevant and inadequate now. I wish you all as many times of enjoyment and comfort as are possible. With love, Alice 

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 19, 2018 at 4:52pm

Hi Maxey,

You don't need to shape up Maxey, because I know I never will.

Comment by Maxey on March 19, 2018 at 1:52pm

Hi, 

i have'nt been around for a while.  I had the ridiculous notion that over time I would get better, but that has not happened.  I think, if anything, I am getting a bit "insane" thinking of how meaningless my life has become.

The few friends I have made since I moved are nice, but I have no inclination to do things with them.  When I do, I am wishing it to be over so I can go home.  When I am home, I then realize how lonely I am and begin the downward spiral of crying and feeling sorry for myself.  I then start thinking, "what if death is just that, and I will not see my love again?".  That makes me so upset that I think I am going to totally lose my mind.

Nothing seems to interest me anymore; I sleep until noon or later to make the days go by.  This surely is "hell" on earth!  Every time I get a pain, I am hoping that it is a sign that I am going to get my wish and die.

Sorry to be a downer, but I am really beginning to worry about my mental health.  I thought I was doing so much better a few months ago, but now I am in an even worse place.  I miss my husband and all the things we used to do.  My neighbor's were telling me how they were planning a cruise and how excited they were.  I had to leave because I could feel the tears welling up.  We used to love to travel and planned something each years when we retired.  Now there is nothing to look forward to, and I am ashamed that I envy others who have their spouses and their happiness.

Wow!  What a wonderful life!?  I hope someone can reply and make me know that this is just not me and I should "shape up"!

Comment by Linda Engberg on March 17, 2018 at 2:41pm

Thank You for caring.

 

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Briana Wroten joined Karen's group
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
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Avi is now friends with Frances Koonce and Brett Bowman
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks BlueBell and Brett.  Bluebell wishing that you get perfect soon.  Brett, do you have a skype Id where we can have a call?"
7 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I am so happy for you. And you are obviously doing better with women than I am..."
yesterday
Chanel commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"I'm sorry to hear that you're still going through a tough time, Rain. I feel like some days I'm okay and others I'm struggling. I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to."
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BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Congratulations Avi! Bluebell"
yesterday
Susan Dee Leatham posted a blog post

While I was sleeping

It has been 4 years since my mom died.  I still think about it every day, and can't seem to look past it.  I know I need to go grocery shopping.  I know I need to entertain my 4 year old but before I do anything today I want to share what has helped me tremendously in making my mom's death easier to live with.The first thing that helps is remembering her and being stubborn about NOT letting her go.  I don't have to let my mom go.  She already went.  The thing I do have to do is admit how I feel…See More
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Susan Dee Leatham posted a status
"It has been 4 years since I lost my mom. I never got "over" it. It has remained the most traumatic terrible thing that has ever happened."
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Profile IconCJ, Roslyn E!lison, Brend and 1 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Your mom is all around you..."
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Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Thanks a lot Theressa.  For 4 days it was a roller coaster ride as we were in hospital but now as I am at my home I again get sad feeling my mother's absence. My wife and daughter is at my wife's place as there is no lady at my place…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Congratulations Avi!!!!! You have many happy years ahead of you!!!"
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi All Guys I was away for few days as I am blessed with a baby girl on 10 Aug 18. Both mother and baby doing fine.  I planned my baby only as my mother wanted to see her grand child but destiny had other plans. But I hope she has still blessed…"
Tuesday
Rain commented on Cathy Richardson's group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"It's been almost two years for me. It doesn't hurt any less. Some days I push it away but then all of a sudden every bit of it hits like a ton of bricks. I did tell a few of my best friends and I mostly regret it. Now I feel it's just…"
Tuesday
Frances Koonce replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"Awww- I’m sorry about that! It must make you feel really terrible that you can’t just take her home.  The same thing happened with my mom after her heart attack. She couldn’t just live by herself anymore. We had to empty her…"
Tuesday
Profile Iconmorgan and Natasha Camacho-Gomes joined Amy Reed's group
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Losing a spouse and dating again

I lost my spouse 16 months ago. Have gotten into a new relationship but he lets me grieve openly. I have a2 year old daughter. Also I am 26See More
Tuesday
dream moon JO B replied to dream moon JO B's discussion mad at god
"iv bean to day to sea her iv hadto liee to her wish i feal bad wen can i go homee wen drs says so wear isdr on holday  why am hear coz dr says so i anserd it for abot 40 mins i did evry tim i leabee i feal dranedd i do  th 5 mons latr she…"
Monday
Jeff Tice commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you bluebird.  My kids have been a huge comfort for me.  Making me laugh even when I don't want to and giving me someone to occupy my time and energy with.  I am working my way through this slowly and they help…"
Monday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Jeff, So sorry for your loss."
Monday

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