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Lost My Spouse...

Members: 337
Latest Activity: 12 hours ago

Discussion Forum

There Is No Loss 10 Replies

While I admit to being psychologically complex lol, I realize how ignorant I have been. I have spent time going after women who resemble Her in any sort of way. After all the days and nights gazing…Continue

Started by Jon-Paul Ackerman. Last reply by Linda Engberg on Saturday.

Lost wife 2 Replies

i lost my wife Katherine after 3 months of battle with cancer on dec 28/17.  We are to young for this, she was 36 and I’m 41.  We have 4 kids between 12-17. She was one of a kind person.  We were…Continue

Started by Ronald mclaren. Last reply by Dawn W Jan 10.

Over 3 years now... 13 Replies

My Wife came to me again seeming very disappointed with my sadness. She relayed to me that I should be rejoicing that I have Her for eternity rather than being depressed that She's absent physically.…Continue

Started by Jon-Paul Ackerman. Last reply by Linda Engberg Jan 8.

lost my soulmate 3 Replies

I lost my partner very suddenly in October (2017) the night before he was fine, we put the kids to bed and he was laughing and joking as he always did, we'd even planned to go for breakfast the next…Continue

Started by L.O. Last reply by Elynn m Jan 3.

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Comment by Paul on December 13, 2017 at 6:41pm

Count me among those who are looking forward to death after losing my wife. I am absolutely not interested in anything else.

Comment by Linda Engberg on December 13, 2017 at 6:28am

SINCE I LOST MY HUSBAND, I WILL NEVER BE THE SAME PERSON I WAS

Comment by Linda Engberg on December 13, 2017 at 6:24am

Lost Without Him,

I have to agree with you, it is now 5 years since I lost my Husband to cancer, but he lives in me everyday. We were soulmates. I tried to fit back into the world, but cannot without him and I have choose to live with it. I don't want to move on and I know I never will.

Comment by Alice Thompson on December 13, 2017 at 6:21am

Hi Dawn, I’m so sorry you have lost your beloved husband. I hope you don’t think that the suffering of some people posting here has any bearing on your experience. All people are different, all loves different, and all losses different. It is not possible to know what kind of pain another person is experiencing, because it’s all on the inside. For that reason I think it is unhelpful to compare how two people grieve. There is a risk of unintentionally causing a griever more pain by suggesting they are not making enough effort to feel better. Having heard people’s stories in this group, these are are strong, resourceful people who love very deeply and have been dealt a cruel blow. They are heroes every day for fighting their way through the hours for the sake of those they love.

Comment by bluebird on December 12, 2017 at 9:11pm

Dawn,

If the book helps you to move forward with your life, and that's something you want to do, then I truly hope you are able to do so.

For some of us, though, it is simply not a choice. My husband's death ended my life, and now I only hope to die and be with him again, or if there is no afterlife, to die and have this pain finally end. Like Lost Without Him, I have absolutely no interest in life anymore.

Please realize that it isn't like this for everyone; I hope you are able to have hope and find peace, but some of us on this sitenever will, at least not in this life, now that our beloved souses/partners have died.

Comment by Lost with out him on December 12, 2017 at 8:48pm

Hi Dawn:

i can can understand your fear.. Most of us here you are right,  are NOT okay. Most of us are going through the motions of a life but are dead inside. It's coming up a year for me Feb 11.. I cannot tell you how I made it this far? I am still dazed and confused. I often forget he is gone forever. No I do not want to live, besides I am dead anyway. Every minute is excruciatingly painful, void of any joy. I am half a person. I am lonely and thrushed in a world that there is no longer a place for me. I have wanted to leave for every minute he has been gone. I pray for death each day. I do not care about my diet, have stopped caring about my health. My life has no value to me without Andrew. I am not meant to be here without him. I do not kill myself as I feel it is a selfish act. ( and do not want my Daughter and Granddaughters to suffer because of my selfishness. ) if they were not here I would have been gone along time ago. Sorry that this is not what you were expecting. This is the only place we can be honest about how we feel.

Comment by Dawn W on December 12, 2017 at 7:51pm

finding Daylight After Loss Shatters Your World.  SEVEN CHOICES book is by Elizabeth Harper Neeld

Comment by Dawn W on December 12, 2017 at 7:38pm

Comment by Dawn W on December 12, 2017 at 7:37pm

hi  all

just wanted to share this review I founded on a book called Seven Choices on Amazon

i am new to this message board and newly widowed (1month) but I know my husband expressed his desire for me to be OK .. I am a little scared of this message board as I see people years into their grief who are not OK.  I want to honour him.. I don't want to give up..I know we will be together again.  I want hope

please choose hope.  Please try to move forward with memories and love in your heart

Love Dawn

Comment by Alice Thompson on December 12, 2017 at 5:01pm

Thanks to you all, in this group. You continue to be a lifeline for me. We truly do have understanding here, even though it’s a pale shadow of the understanding we lost. 

 

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Joann replied to Donna's discussion It really was my fault **CONTAINS TRIGGER**
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JenShep is now friends with TimB, Amy and Jon-Paul Ackerman
10 hours ago
TimB joined Katherine Ellis's group
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Losing Someone to Cancer

This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.See More
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TimB joined Amy's group
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You're too young to be a widow

I never thought that I would be a widow in my forties.  My friends can't relate and feel the need to comment on everything, even if they have no experience with grief.  I know they mean well but only we know what we are going though.See More
12 hours ago
TimB left a comment for JenShep
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12 hours ago
TimB updated their profile
12 hours ago
Karen commented on Raven Richardson's blog post Heartbroken
"It’s been 6 months for me but it’s still fresh every morning. I miss him so and think about all our hopes and plans just died with him. "
13 hours ago
Karen updated their profile
yesterday
Karen posted a blog post

Learning to live without my best friend

A little over 6 months ago I lost my husband of 43 years.  We were only 19 & 20 when we got married so we essentially grew up together.  He has been my best friend, my confidante, my love.  About 5 years ago he developed COPD so we knew our time together might be limited, however many people live several years with COPD by keeping it under control.  Unfortunately, last May, he developed a lung infection and was very sick, in the hospital for the first time in his 63 years.  But once under…See More
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Profile IconKim Crago, Elaine Ellison, Jaclyn Fawley and 5 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Gilda commented on Jarvis's group I love my Dad.
"I know how you feel. Seeing my dad in dreams is a great comfort to me, too."
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Jo l posted a blog post

Missing my bf

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JO B commented on Jarvis's group I love my Dad.
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Jennifer joined Jarvis's group
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I love my Dad.

For everyone that has lost their Dad.
yesterday
Jennifer updated their profile
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