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Lost My Spouse...

Members: 364
Latest Activity: Jul 7

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The Holiday Season and my loss 1 Reply

This Christmas Season this year is very hard.Family gatherings are wonderful but l feel my husband not being so much more.Seeing everyone makes it more real that Ron is not here.The tears are in my…Continue

Started by Denise Lavoie. Last reply by Linda Engberg Dec 24, 2018.

Lost my wife 14 Replies

It's been almost a week since i lost my wife to lung disease. She's in my mind 24/7. I don't have anybody else to talk too. I was carred by emotional and physical abuse mostly in my childhood in…Continue

Started by Kyle McKay. Last reply by Corinne C. Rico Nov 12, 2018.

Lost my husband the father of my kids and bestfriend . 3 Replies

  I lost my husband we were high school sweethearts we had plans and it was not suppose to be this way we had two kids together and I feel so lost and the pain i feel becuase of how much I miss him…Continue

Started by Nicole. Last reply by Fran Oct 19, 2018.

FAILING 9 Replies

next month will be three years since I lost my husband and I'm failing miserably I am in serious debt I cant fix, I stay home because I have extreme difficulty leaving my house I don't know how to…Continue

Started by Pamela philipp. Last reply by Corinne C. Rico Oct 4, 2018.

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Comment by stewart p on November 2, 2017 at 11:47am

Linda Engberg your talking about that poem?  Thanks though I can take no credit it for it.  I was bingeing on netflix again watching SOA for like the 4th time in a row, it gets kind of boring but its one of the few things I find takes my mind away from the present which is a nice escape for a while, the scene where he loses his wife i never listended to the song before, not that the episode isnt sad enough but that song really just, i dont know how to say it but just took a lot out of me.  Probably haven't been quite as tearful since 2 or 3 years ago.  Halloween?  All dark at my house, I hate being such a sour grape but what the hell do I care right now?  I dont, but hopefully and God willing one day I still find a little something here and there to smile around this life.

Comment by Nancy on November 2, 2017 at 11:36am
Mary. I am in the very same place. Empty. Hollow
Comment by Mary on November 2, 2017 at 11:32am
Halloween used to be one of my favourite times of year. My husband and I would decorate outside - spooky and fun - all the kids loved it. Now the second Halloween without my Neil. The kids and I didn't have the motivation to do it without him. But we did do pumpkin carvings as we've always done. And my oldest let off some fireworks in the evening in memory of dad. Neil always did fireworks on Halloween. The days are just so empty. Even when you still do some "fun" things it's just empty. I miss my dear Neil. Gone to soon at 52. Not a day a moment goes by that he's not in my mind. We are soulmates. Always will be. I miss him so so very much every minute of every day. I still can't grasp this heart wrenching reality. Has been 18 months. I feel so lost, so alone.
Comment by John T. on October 31, 2017 at 7:51pm

All the family went different directions tonight and left me to hand out candy to the kids.  Unfortunately, they have a huge liquor cabinet.  Year three and even Halloween pulls the rug out from under my feet.

Comment by M Adams on October 31, 2017 at 7:36pm
Couldn't face Halloween in our house without my husband...afraid as well as sad, find myself fearful of so many things these days. Helping at my parents' house with pumpkin carving and candy giving for the second year since becoming a widow. It is a good way to spend the day though hard to see my mother's suffering with loss of memory and dizziness, breathlessness, and trouble walking. Glad to be here but sad, unlike the pumpkin who has a big smile.
Comment by Nancy on October 31, 2017 at 4:10pm
I'm working away from home this week so my grandson will give out the candy. We usually get a good turnout. I'm ok with not being there. First Halloween without my husband of 43 years.
Comment by Linda Engberg on October 31, 2017 at 3:28pm

My 5th Halloween without my Husband. We used to love giving the kids candy, now I just get a DVD and watch with my sweet little dog Babie J.

Comment by Linda Engberg on October 31, 2017 at 3:26pm

Stewart I love your post of Oct. 6

Comment by Nancy on October 26, 2017 at 5:32pm
Thank you for your comnent Linda.
Comment by Linda Engberg on October 26, 2017 at 4:07pm

Nancy,

After I was done with the hospice therapist, she referred to another therapist as I was still grieving after 13 months with her.  

 

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Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I just feel like I am in a fog.  I have a little dog that is at least ten years old.  She adored my Mom & she has really grieved for her.  I know how you feel about your dog.  I worry about her.  She is all I have. …"
3 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too Brett, I sit here an look at my 12 year old Labrador and I know he is on borrowed time, and my heart breaks, losing him will be something that I am not looking forward to. As you said Brett, we have the live our lives until we are called…"
5 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes, I was looking at something that popped up on my Yahoo news feed. It was an article naming 106 celebrities who have passed away in 2019. So many names and faces that I remembered. Now they are gone, and they aren't coming back. Their time…"
10 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett so true she was my security blanket I feel like I have no one to lean on that understood me like her You know what keeps coming in my mind. How true it is and scary that everything has a beginning and an end."
13 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I hear it all the time you don’t know how lucky you were that your mother wasn’t sick and you didn’t have to take care of her I say to them lucky I was lucky that my mother died and I was not right by her side to tell her I love…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, the problem is that our security blankets were ripped away. Like you, sometimes I am glad to be sad. I feel like I am closer to my mom when I am crying. At least, her memory is fresher with me when I am in that zone. I feel like the hard reality…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, millions, billions of people have lost their moms. Sometimes someone will tell me that they have lost their mom, too, but they were able to deal with it, and they wonder why I haven't dealt with it as well. This may sound like an…"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too ...I was sitting marking a paper yesterday and suddenly realized that I can’t see or talk to my mother about this or anything else and the tears came.  But I’m glad to think of her, in a way I can be glad to be sad sometimes.…"
yesterday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I sometimes will just be sitting down and I start to cry because I keep thinking I miss my mom so much my whole world is just not the same I think that I’ve become a different person it will be four years and I still cry I can’t put into…"
yesterday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Definitely a colder world now.  I like the image of the security blanket — like, as we go forward, we will always keep it but eventually may be able to wash it, fold it nicely, and put it in some place of honour close at hand but without…"
yesterday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The world just became a colder place when my mom died. I just remember feeling like all was right with the world when my mom was in the next room. "
yesterday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is such a traumatic event, especially when you have had a wonderful Mom.  It is so hard knowing she is gone.  Knowing this is permanent.  There is no one that can fill the void she left.  My brother was close to Mom, but he…"
yesterday
Cherie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
Amy replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am not a believer and nor was he. We covered the bases just incase though. We were both raised Catholic. That is all besides the point though. "
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"While I never forget that my mom is gone, for some reason it just hits me over the head sometimes. Just out of the blue I'll be like, "Mom is gone." It's horrible. It's ever present. And the thing is that it is always with…"
Monday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My Mom also.  I could always talk to her about anything & knew she was someone I could totally trust.  I am constantly thinking of something I want to share with her & then I remember she is gone.  I loved spending time with…"
Monday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"There is no doubt that it is anxiety. In fact, I think we are experiencing fight or flight. Since birth my mom had been my security blanket."
Monday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is still numbing to think my Mom is gone & I can't talk to her or see her again.  I lost part of me when she passed.  Someone said the restless feelings I have are really anxiety.  Daily crying is part of my life. …"
Monday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I would rather cry on the outside than on the inside. Crying on the outside is a release. I am really tired of being sad. I'm also tired of being scared. Life without my mom still seems like a scary proposition. All we can do is to continue to…"
Monday
Profile IconGeorge Makhniashvili and Amatullah joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Saturday

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