Annette passed May 19th. I was devastated that my soulmate had gone. After being inconsolable and a fountain of tears, over night a few days ago, I was suddenly numb.  I find it hard to care about anything other than our son James. I'm putting on a great show I think, but it is just a show. If it weren't for my boy I would join Annette. Im scared of what happens next, and wonder if I'll ever care again. I'm counting the days that I'll be raising our wonderful 14 year old, but look forward to joining her soon after.

This whole thing has been hell, and I guess I have just given up hope for anything better. I just need to keep a smile face on the outside.

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Dear Ronnie,

My husband has been gone 4 years, died of colon cancer, I have been numb since the day he died, I just go through the everyday motions. My broken heart will never heal.

Linda

Hi, Linda,

It has been almost two years since I lost my husband,and I feel exactly as you do. No matter how much time passes, the pain never seems to ease. Every night I hope I go to sleep and the Lord takes me to join my beloved husband of 55 years.
I wish us all some peace and relief if even only for a few hours.

Wow. My first holiday without her has sucked. We moved to Central America a few years ago but always had some kind of celebration. I have no urge this year because I just feel dead inside. I'm glad James and I are with my parents today so he has someone to be enthusiastic with. 

I'm guessing all the holidays are going to feel empty from now on. I can't imagine how her birthday is going to be like.

I have heard the firsts of everything are the worst. Going to the first great granddaughters birthday party was devastating for me. When I got in the car all by myself I cried like a baby all the way home as this was the first birthday spent without my precious Jim. I really am not looking forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas but I know I will make it through. Hang in There Ronnie and stay tough for your son.

Hi, Ronnie,
I know this feeling of being numb; I now look in the mirror some days and wonder who I am at this point. I see a face, but I am not able to connect any more. After 55 years with my husband, I truly feel that part of my soul is missing. I go through the days like a robot counting each one as one more day closer to leaving this earth and joining my husband. That is my only consolation.
I hope you know that all of the replies here are so sincere. We all feel your pain and heartbreak and wish you some comfort and relief.
Peace to you

The only time peace will be with me is when I join my Husband, he was my everything.

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