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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

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I am lost without her! (MOM) 12 Replies

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Comment by steacy del valle on May 14, 2011 at 9:52am
todaymakes a year since my mom died it sucks. i try to not think of it but it just feels like im reliving that day over and over in my head. on mothers day was sucky too it was the first mothers day with out her and i kept thinking of all the stuff i would do for that day and i would just cry. i would always start the day with breakfast in bead and then did anything she wanted and buy her stuff. i really missed it it felt like someone literally punched me in my heart now my birthday is comming up and it was the same day she got creamated and i dont enjoy my b-day anymore its hard to think that the same day she gave birth to me would be the sameday he body was turned into powder 20 years later
Comment by Karon B. Porter on May 13, 2011 at 3:19pm

This pass mother's day was really hard for me being that I am in a different place of my life.... I asked my girlfriend to marry me almost a month ago.  I realized my mother will no be here with me in the physical.  I know my mom is with every day.  I really hope you all are taking care of yourself.  I would like to extend my services to you all... I am beachbody coach.  I would like to shre with you all "Please take care of yourselves, that is what your mother's would want."  Please read below...

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http://219tvmagazine.journalism.cuny.edu/2010/11/19/workingout/

 

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Comment by Belinda Rose on May 11, 2011 at 10:26pm
to dana, i m so sorry about about your loss. i have lost my mom and sister and it was so sudden. you are not alone in your pain or shock. and what you feel is not crazy
Comment by Dana Jarrett on April 23, 2011 at 2:49pm
On March 23, 2011 My father shot and killed my Mom and then committed suicide. My mother was one of my best friends. My mom, my sister, and I were always best friends from the time I was born. This sudden loss of our parents has left us in incredible pain and shock. The thought that our father hated us enough to take her from us just breaks our heart! We haven't even began to let reality settle in, but we are lost without our Mom. We both joined this site hoping to be able to talk and work through this grief with others that are hurting too
Comment by Amy Kuptz on April 19, 2011 at 5:10pm
I am really missing my mom right now and reading others stories seems to help.  Tomorrow will be 9 years without her.  I am graduating with a bachelors degree next month and it is a difficult time for me. This was our dream for me and I wish she was here to see.  I am very proud of myself and don't think I could have done it if she had not been my mother. She gave me the best childhood and I would not be where I am today without her.
Comment by Denise Murphy on April 19, 2011 at 12:33pm

Hi Jennie,

I am so sorry for your loss, it does help to talk about it. I also was the one I thought who had to be strong, but I realized I had to deal with it or it would come out some other way. I think we know someday we will experience the loss of our parents, but it does no make it easy. My mom was my best friend, the one I called when something good happened or when I was feeling down. I could tell her anything she loved me unconditionally. I miss not talking to her, I think I talked to her everyday specially after my father died in 2002, she died in 2005. I still miss her alot but I know someday I will be with her again which comforts me. In the mean time I need to live life because that is what she would want me to do. When my dad died I had my mom to grieve with, but when she died I felt alone in my grief. I did go to a bereavement group which help alot. I will keep you in my prayers, keep coming back this is a great and safe place to express your feeling.

God Bless,

Denise

Comment by Jennie on April 19, 2011 at 10:57am

just looking for another way to work through my pain, lost my mom in Jan 2010 and just haven't taken the time nor wanted to face the thought of being without her.  I had lost my dad 10 years ago too, and the more i think about it I dont think I really grieved him either.  I try to be the tough one, the support for everyone else...take a few minutes, let it out and move on...dont have time to deal with this ----but i need to make time or its never going to get any better.  Im hoping this will help me to do that.  I dont have my mom to "talk" with anymore, but maybe by expressing how I feel to other people who understand it will make it that much easier to work through. : )

Comment by Denise Murphy on March 31, 2011 at 1:48pm

Hi Judy,

I too went through the thought that this was just a bad dream, sleep was the only time I did not think about what was happening.  I even wished I was Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz and I was sleeping for a week and dreaming this happened.  But eventually when the time was right I did accept the reality, I think it's a way the body and mind works so that you can function from this devastating event in your life.  I would say the Serenity Prayer over and over.  I could not change what had happened, and I had to go on with my life for the sake of myself and my family.  One quote I read that help me was "Learning from the past is useful. Dwelling on the past is destructive.  I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

God Bless,

Denise

Comment by Judy on March 30, 2011 at 10:37pm
Thank you Denise, I think you really have some helpful ideas, and I will give them a whirl.  Something has got to help.  You are so right about your sister and my mother - it was the same thing - a massive heart attack in her sleep.  For the first week I was begging God and my husband to wake me from this nightmare.  At least I know its real now, but now that it is real, it is really hopeless.
Comment by Denise Murphy on March 30, 2011 at 7:56pm

Hi Judy,

I lost my mom in 2005 after a year of her being sick with cancer and going for treatments.  She was my best friend and the center of our family, always at my house, there for every occasion. 
To lose your mom so suddenly has to be devastating, I lost my younger sister in July of 2010 suddenly, she had a massive heart attack in her sleep and left two children ages 9 and 10.  I went over it a million times in my head what I could have done to change things, it was the way I coped with such a sudden shock.  I felt as if my heart was broken, every time I looked at her children I wanted to cry and sometimes did.  I think for the first two months I cried everyday, not all day but I did do a lot of isolating.  One thing I did was write my sister a letter saying everything I wanted to say and I put it in my bible, when I'm really sad i take the letter out and read it, and it makes me feel better.  I also do a lot of journaling that helped me with my mom and it is helping me with my sister. Another thing I could suggest is doing a scrapbook about your mom , I have even made scapebook pages for my siblings, when they thank me I thank them because it was therapy for me.  You could even do something with the kids like making a stepping stone for your garden, or letting them pick out pictures of your mom and themselves to put in the scrapbook. I also went to the library and got books about grieving and specifically on the lose of a parent.   Remember you not only lost your mom you also lost a part of yourself, the self that had a mom.  I remember thinking I just want to be the person that I was before this happened, I want things to be normal again, it took me a while to realize I would never be that person again, and things would never be normal like it was, but for my mom I could be a better person.  That gave me a glimmer of hope, but I don't think anyone ever get's over it you get through it.  It does get better, I can't tell you how long because everyone is different grief has no timeline, just remember to take care of yourself and try to remember those great moments you shared with her, and what advice she would give you if she were here. 

 

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