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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

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Never ending 4 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Brenda Ann Jan 11.

Does it ever end? 5 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Sun Oct 29, 2018.

I miss my Mom 4 Replies

Started by Sun. Last reply by Michael Thompson Oct 28, 2018.

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Comment by Sue Waxman on October 30, 2011 at 12:54pm

Elaine,

I completely agree with you that cancer is an evil disease. I will share this with you. When mom was in the hospital, very weak from chemo and radiation...she told myself and my two sisters that the night before two babies slept beside her. One tucked under her right arm and one the left. My sisters made fun of her stating it was the medication. HA.HA. But when they left the room I told my mother that they were angels guarding her and she said yes they were. She was as clear minded and sincere as I can tell you. Cancer is evil. Created by the devil himself. It robs us of our lives, our loved ones. Same as Alzheimers, heart attacks and still born babies. Life without our mother's is almost unbearable isn't it. But we have no choice. God does has a plan for each of us. My mother was all I had in this whole world. Now I spend all of my time earning my way to be reunited beside her. God bless and remember there is way more to this thing called "life" than we can possibly imagine. Be open...there is a great deal to learn before we are accepted into heaven. Sue

Comment by mercy on October 29, 2011 at 9:08am
Elaine, I know exactly what you are saying. I have fantasies of going to bed and not waking up to this torture, but then I wonder who will raise my daughter that I love so much? I didn't know I could make it thus far but I have so maybe God has a good plan for me.
Comment by mercy on October 26, 2011 at 4:51pm

I’m so sorry; it’s very hard to live life without mom. Mom was sick for one year and we watched her slowly lose her battle with cancer. It was the most painful thing I had to go through. My two brothers and dad had sudden deaths and my other brother had a long battle with illness too. It’s never easy. I thought I would be prepared for mom’s death since she was so sick but I was so wrong. It’s been five months and I cry almost daily. I long for her so much that sometimes my heart aches.  Mom was our hero, when dad died 17 years ago, she took over everything, she worked tirelessly to continue my dad’s legacy. We miss her and tried so hard to get her the best treatment but God had other plans. It’s still very hard for us to come to terms with mom’s death, I know I’ll never be the same ever again. I’m not forty yet but have had five deaths in my immediate family and numerous death in my extended family, including my baby niece and nephew.

God bless you dear.

Comment by Cindi B on October 26, 2011 at 3:58pm

Hey Kris and Zonna.

Thanks for sharing your stories. It's not easy to lose our mothers. Rather it was a long or sudden illness. We're never truly ready to let them go. At least that's my feeling. Mine has been gone for almost 4 months now and today while making coffee I thought of something funny I wanted to tell her and started to reach for the phone. It breaks my heart every time.

Zonna I know exactly what you mean about underestimating the pain of grief, I use to too. Not now, never again.

Comment by Zonna on October 26, 2011 at 3:47pm
Hello, my name is Zonna and I lost my mother 7 months ago, I took care of her for several years and we lived together, I lost her within two days after getting her out of the hospital and home where she wanted to be. I had just got her to bed and walked out of her room for maybe five minutes went back in to check on her and found her not breathing, her wishes were not to be ventilated or any heroics, I found out after calling 911 they had to do these things, at the emergency room I was talking with the doctor when her heart started to fail for a fourth time, at that time I had to make the decision to respect her wishes and let her go, I got to hold her while she left but it is so painful. My two sisters and I are lost without her, she raised us three by herself, she was and is our hero, I am having a very hard time, I cry out of the blue, I miss her so much, I miss walking into her room and talking to her, does it get better? I will never underestimate the pain of grief again, I truly did not know what it is like until now.
Comment by Kris Baclawski on October 26, 2011 at 8:40am
I thought I'd introduce myself as a new member of this group.  I lost my 88 yr old mom about 4 months ago to a massive stroke following emergency surgery.   From the time she entered the hospital's emergency room to the time she passed away was less than 48 hours.   What has been most difficult for me is "renegotiating" my relationships with my father (parents were estranged) and my older sister who lived with my mom and is my dad's greatest supporter.   I feel smothered by my sister wanting to take care of me.   Mostly I had no idea how much I'm missing Mom, even though the effects of her initial stroke whittled away so much of her ability to communicate.
Comment by mercy on October 24, 2011 at 12:54pm

IIana and Elaine. I feel the same way. I feel so alone most of thetime, sometimes I seek company thats very unhealthy for me. My baby girl will be two soon, she's the only person that I feel connected to since I'm in a far away land, away from family and old friends. I hate the holidays so much now and cannot even get into the spirit no matter how hard I try. I just keep hoping one day this cloud will pass, for the sake of my baby.  Elaine, I too feel like the best part of me is gone but I still have my little girl who needs me. I know if not for her, I would not even be in this world.

Comment by Ilana Rabone on October 24, 2011 at 7:12am
I know how you feel Elaine! I am have been feeling lonely since my mother passed a year and a half ago.  My friends have all abandoned me and my Dad and my Brother have their own lives and we seem to go in different directions.  I was crying all weekend because a long time friend decided not to be my friend anymore because she said I haven't been there for her.  Now I'm scared that I will be alone for New Years because all my friends either have boyfriends or don't want to be with me (I guess because I talk about my mom alot).  Where do you live Elaine?  I'm in Florida. 
Comment by Ilana Rabone on October 21, 2011 at 7:50am
I haven't been having many dreams about my mother and I don't know why.  I used to have them all the time.  Last night I had a frightening dream about my 10 year old son and how when he was a baby my ex-husband tried to take him away from me.  I woke up sweating and I kept going into his room because I could swear that I kept hearing my son crying for me.  I'm not sure what is going on and its beginning to worry me.
Comment by mercy on October 20, 2011 at 3:36pm

Sue; thank you so much for the advice as always, and what a coincidence with the inheritance story?? Its been five months since mom died and we are just starting to try and function.

 I knew it would be tremendously hard for me to accept something after the loss of someone, am just now learning how hard. I’ll definitely sit on this for a while, in my grief, I’ll probably do something stupid so waiting is a good idea. She also had a lot of real estate and I’m not sure how she designated that; I dare not ask and will probably wait for years to find out. There’s such a finality to wills and trusts that makes the grief ten times worse.

 

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