I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

Members: 732
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New here 3 Replies

Started by Lynn Fisher. Last reply by Brett Bowman Jul 12, 2019.

Never ending 4 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Brenda Ann Jan 11, 2019.

Does it ever end? 5 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Sun Oct 29, 2018.

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Comment by Brett Bowman on February 7, 2020 at 1:00pm

Brenda, I have been told my story many times here. I was also my mom's caretaker, and she was the center of my world as well. In fact, four years after her death, I would say that she still is. I certainly understand.

I hope you will continue to post here. We can't help you if you do not. You found a group of people who love their moms and miss them with all of our hearts. I hope that you will let us help.

Comment by M Adams on February 6, 2020 at 10:46pm

Brenda, so sorry for what you’re going through. I really mother died in the autumn of 2018 and like you I was honoured to have the chance to help her in what turned out to be her last five years, when she had many health challenges.  She was always so brave, and so very kind and supportive to me.  After my husband died it was her love that sustained me and made it worthwhile for me to live.  The closeness of our relationship and especially the intimacy of those last years have made it very sad and disorienting to be without her, maybe that is true for you as well? but at the same time I hope you’ll find some comfort in the fact that you and your mother had such a deeply loving relationship, and that you were there for her when she needed you.  

Comment by Brenda on February 6, 2020 at 9:18pm

Hi, my name is Brenda. I lost my mom to brain cancer 36 days ago, the pain and grief are uncontrollable.  I took care of her for 10 months everyday, and feel so lucky and honored to have been able to do it! She has always been my everything, I don't know how I get up in the mornings and function, I walk around the world and exist in a fog.  I would do anything for my mom and only hope that she was, has been, and is proud of me.  I am so proud and honored to be her daughter!  I love you mom and am looking for some understanding, compassion, support,  and hope from others.

Bless you all and praying for strength and comfort today.

Comment by Avi on January 29, 2020 at 5:50am

Hi Katherine, 

Everybody on this group will understand your pain and there are no concrete steps that you can take to relax your grief. Take small steps and you will be able to find a way forward. Your mother will always want you to be happy and live a healthy life. 
Please feel free to post your feelings. 

Comment by Katherine A Pericas Geersten on January 23, 2020 at 8:25pm

Hi everyone, My name is Katherine. 

I am learning how to deal with the loss of my mom, she passed away two months ago.My mom was never my best friend, but she was so much more. She made me the person that I am today and living without her has been very hard.

I'm hoping to find advice or at least someone who understands my situation.


Comment by Brett Bowman on October 8, 2019 at 1:39am

Avi, I don't know if we can rethink our emotions that way. Our emotions are what they are, although reason can help us form our emotions and hopefully change them for the better. I don't know if my mom can hear me or not. I certainly don't want her to be sad. What is powerful for me is knowing that my mom would want me to pull myself out of this and live my life. That gives me inspiration to try. Maybe it will get better one day. I'll keep taking baby steps.

Comment by Avi on October 8, 2019 at 1:22am

How are you all doing? 

I had bad last 2 days. Felt lot of guilt and cried. There were some moments which made me remember my mother. 

Also I hear comforting words by a lady that people who have gone from this world can still feel your emotions. So if you cry a lot, they will also be disheartened but they cannot do anything. It is like you have gone to another country, your mother calls you and says that she is unwell but you cannot come immediately. You will be disturbed so consider the soul who cannot do anything seeing their loved ones cry. 

This made me rethink my emotions. 

Have a nice day all. 

Comment by Brett Bowman on September 21, 2019 at 12:21am

Hi, Avi. I hope that we are all doing great as well. That's a lot to hope for. When I first lost my mom, the idea of doing great seemed impossible, and it still seems like it is an incredibly hard task. I think of what we are experiencing now is our "new normal." I can't speak for everyone here, but no matter what good happens in our lives, we will always feel a tremendous void. That is the natural course of life though. No one ever hid the reality that as we got older, folks that we loved would die. We always knew, but maybe we thought that would always be tomorrow, not today. Our today came.

I had a very bad dream about my mom. She was on the other side of my bedroom door. She was calling for help. I couldn't get up. In my case, it's my own anxiety that causes these dreams. You can't hide from what is truly inside of you. Even in sleep. Grief forces you to deal with it. It will not be ignored.

It is so great that you feel that your mom is near. Use that. Talk to her. Tell her that you love her and miss her. And take comfort in the knowledge that she hears you.

Comment by Avi on September 20, 2019 at 9:50pm

Hi All

Hope you all are doing great. I felt really discomfort yesterday, not sure why. I remembered my mother and talked to her, felt better. Sometimes I feel she is around. 

Comment by SelV on September 9, 2019 at 1:26am

Towards the end of August, I dreamt about my parents. I had many pleasant dreams about my mother since April. Never dreamt of my father so that was the first. My parents were getting married...either celebrating their 60th or 75th wedding anniversary. It was a very happy occasion. My parents were all decked up and smiling away on the dais. I could clearly see my mother grinning and showing off her pearly whites and all. If my parents were alive till today, they would have celebrated their 65th wedding anniversary in July. I hope my mother or both my parents come in my dreams regularly...well at least I see them alive daylights are a living nightmare!


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Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
23 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett yes as horrible as it is for us both our dogs have aged almost 5 years since our moms died I’m having a really hard time with it I’m thinking that I might need counseling my boy is going to be 13 he still gets around but I know…"
23 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brenda, so much of what you said is so familiar with me. I haven't been able to take a nap since my mom died four years ago. Once, while my mom was still alive and on Hospice, I laid down for a second. I fell asleep and I was having a sweet…"
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Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brenda. I know exactly how you feel.  This is how time changed things for me, as time went the thoughts seem to have become more acceptable but missing her still remains. And I cry.  Probably to much   "
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brenda.   I am terribly anxious every day.  I try to have faith in God to get me through whatever I am dealing with.  I have a dog who is goi g to be 13 in April and all I do is worry about him. My last dog I had my mom to lean on and…"
M Adams commented on M Adams's blog post A Stoic Response to Grief (from The Daily Stoic)
"I really relate to certain parts of this Stoicism commentary, especially the last quotation and the final four paragraphs that come after it.  Today I am struggling to write a letter of condolence to a longtime family friend who recently lost…"
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Support is always here when you need it. Hugs to all."
Ammy commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Thank you Josephine.  I agree that we need to be able to laugh, but it usually takes time for that to start.  I honestly feel good when I can laugh at something or with someone.  It's like a medicine, but it took time for me to…"
Josephine Crawford commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Teresa, Ammy and Sue, I understand and share your pain. Yes, I too feel like a different version of myself and going forward has been a struggle. Ladies, they would have wanted us to be happy. I sometimes feel guilty when I find myself laughing.…"
M Adams posted a blog post

A Stoic Response to Grief (from The Daily Stoic)

A Stoic Response to Grief“It is better to conquer our grief than to deceive it. For if it has withdrawn, being merely beguiled by pleasures and preoccupations, it starts up again and from its very respite gains force to savage us. But the grief that has been conquered by reason is calmed for ever. I am not therefore going to prescribe for you those remedies which I know many people have used, that you divert or cheer yourself by a long or pleasant journey abroad, or spend a lot of time…See More

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