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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

Members: 730
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Never ending 4 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Brenda Ann Jan 11.

Does it ever end? 5 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Sun Oct 29, 2018.

I miss my Mom 4 Replies

Started by Sun. Last reply by Michael Thompson Oct 28, 2018.

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Comment by Sue Toler on June 13, 2019 at 2:14pm

Thanks so much!  It helps having others that understand.  Some of my family is supportive & that helps.  It helps just having someone listen that truly understands.  I have one sibling, but he was never as close to my parents.  I was with my Mom when she passed & it was so sudden.  Someone told me you are never ready & I know I wasn't.  

Comment by Brett Bowman on June 13, 2019 at 1:27pm

It's important to have people in your life who understand, even if they are on a message board like this, because sometimes you have to look far and wide to find someone to walk with you.

Sometimes I will call my mom's sister. She will listen for a minute and then she will start talking about her grand kids latest accomplishments, or about a vacation that her kids are taking. I am not afforded grief.

Sometimes we have to take this walk alone. There are people who have a wonderful support system. God Bless them. There are others who do not. I come here from time to time because I know that the people here understand. I hope to offer a listening ear to others as well. I can't be where you are and put my arm around you, but I can sure listen, and I sure do understand.

Comment by Sue Toler on June 13, 2019 at 12:02pm

Thank you, some days are better than others.  I feel so for you.  My Mom was the center of my world also.  I lived with her & took care of her.  I am so thankful that I could be there for her, but now I miss her so much.  My whole life has changed.  This website is such a blessing & help right now.  

Comment by Brett Bowman on June 13, 2019 at 11:01am

Three months is not very long. It is still very fresh for you. There will be a lot of triggers. Sometimes they will hit you out of the blue. Other times you know that one is coming, like if you have to drive by a familiar place. It's important to face them head on. It sounds like you are.

Comment by Sue Toler on June 13, 2019 at 6:13am

I never cried much before, but I do now.  I think crying does help.  I had a trigger this morning & have been crying since.  It has been over three months, but I still feel numb.  

Comment by Sue Toler on June 13, 2019 at 6:03am

I had such a close bond with my Mom.  We always were so close.  I feel the same way.  There is just such a loss now.  I miss her so much.  There is nothing that compares to a mother's love.  I was blessed to have a wonderful Mom, but I miss her so much now.  I talked to her about everything.  She was the one person in my life I knew I could trust & that really cared.  

Comment by Avi on June 13, 2019 at 2:25am

I agree Brett. It is mainly the guilt. Thanks for the nice words

Comment by Brett Bowman on June 13, 2019 at 1:20am

After my mom died I came to a sad reality. It didn't really matter who reached out to me. I mean, it certainly helped to have a shoulder to lean on, but the only person I really wanted to talk to was my mom. I can't have that. We can't have that.

Avi, what you are talking about is two fold. One: It's hard to have a good time because we remember what we have lost, and it can hit you right in the middle of a good belly laugh. Grief has a very long reach. Two: And this is most unfortunate, is the frequent guilt that accompanies grief. It's one thing for me to say to myself, "How can I be having a good time without mom?" I can live with that. It's when I start feeling guilt about all of the things I think I should have done. Hindsight is 20/20. I can't have the old days back. I hope and pray that we all can let go of the lingering, ever present grief that we have. We can learn from our mistakes, but we cannot go back and make them right. Mom's have strong shoulders. If ever I let my mom down, she loved me with all of her heart knowing full well that I was a long way from perfect. It's that unconditional love that I miss the most.

Comment by Avi on June 13, 2019 at 12:04am

I also feel alone in a room full of people, even in parties and celebrations. My inner conscious does not allow me to enjoy.

Comment by Brett Bowman on June 12, 2019 at 10:48pm

Theresa and I lost our moms the same week. I'm glad that someone else understands how I feel, and it's nice to know that we are not alone, but to Sel's point, in a lot of ways I could feel alone in a room full of loving people. No one can replace our moms. 

 

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Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I dream about my Mom & Dad & thankfully they are always good dreams that are comforting.  An Aunt that I was close to is in a lot of the dreams with my parents.  I have one sibling. He is never in the dreams of my parents.  I…"
2 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I rarely dream about my mom. When I do dream about her it is almost always bad. I had a horrible dream last night. It was very short. I was standing near the front door of my mom's house. I looked down to greet my dog. There was a little puppy…"
14 hours ago
Lauren A Fernandez is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thanks Nancy, I am sure everyone in our group can relate."
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes we have no choice but to live without our mothers. Grief and guilt will be there through out and some days will be really hard than others. Yesterday was pathetic for me as my father said something that really hit me. I hope to see my mother…"
yesterday
Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Love this Linda.  Thanks for posting it. "
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Nancy commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I relate to you all who have posted lately.  2 years for me.  2nd year was worse than the first as reality set in and shock lessened.  I am still in a trauma state of mind.  Forgetful, irritable, less patient.  I isolate…"
Saturday
Deanna N Nash added a discussion to the group surviving family members' murders
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Nothing feels real

My husband was brutly murdered 6 day ago and nothing feels real to me I'm still waiting to wake up or him to call me the pain is unbearable I don't know if I can go on anymore
Saturday
Deanna N Nash commented on Susie H's group surviving family members' murders
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Deanna N Nash joined Susie H's group
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morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Robin, thank you.  Bluebird was the honesty that i discovered on this site that made it possible for me to express what I go through.  Several others who write let me know too.  I tend to reach out here, particularly when I am…"
Saturday
Robin commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
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Saturday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I really don't know what to say to all the newer people who come here looking for help and comfort because I have struggled for years. I did find an article written by a psychotherapist just the other day that made some sense to me about the…"
Saturday
Sharon batten posted a discussion

Missing my true love

My partner died 14 weeks ago and I am struggling big time without her, we been together for 10 years and now I have nothing left,
Friday
Sharon batten left a comment for Sharon batten
"I hate my life without her now I miss her so much, we been together for 10 years and now I have nothing left"
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Profile IconSharon batten, Eileen A. Palazza, Deanna N Nash and 2 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Kathleen Jordan posted photos
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Kathleen Jordan commented on Anna-Marie's blog post When does the crying stop.
"Even though dream moon can't do grammar, I agree. It doesn't stop...it will hit at moments out of the clear blue....4 years, 9 years or 20.  It is a loss, and it's real."
Friday
Kathleen Jordan added 2 discussions to the group What's Next?
Friday

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