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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

Members: 731
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New here 3 Replies

Started by Lynn Fisher. Last reply by Brett Bowman Jul 12.

Never ending 4 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Brenda Ann Jan 11.

Does it ever end? 5 Replies

Started by Betty Ellsworth. Last reply by Sun Oct 29, 2018.

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Comment by Brett Bowman on February 15, 2019 at 10:28pm

Avi, I actually looked up the EquoVox. I couldn't find an English link for it. I'll keep looking. I'm just really curious how it works. And I want you to make your own decisions. I just want you to be happy.

Comment by Brett Bowman on February 15, 2019 at 10:26pm

M, I'm half Catholic, and Theresa is 100% Catholic. This is a huge part of Catholicism. Ouiji boards just scare the crap out of me. I listened to a lecture series from a Vatican exorcists. There was a question and answer period. Someone asked him how he knew for sure that the people he worked with were not just mentally unbalanced. He said that 99% of the time the person just needs a good psychiatrist, but he also told some stories that were amazing if true, and I don't know why he would lie. He was adamant about not trying to contact someone beyond the grave. It's scary stuff. The Vatican can list the names of seven angels. They can list a lot more demons. They keep those names quiet for fear that someone will think it's a joke and try to summon those names. He even said that one of the first questions he asks in an exorcism is, "Who am I dealing with?" It's hard to imagine in 2019 that such things are possible, but he is listening for specific names. And he has a history with them. He has picked up conversations from where he last left off with a demon. It will say things that it could only know if they had a history. And he reiterated that when a four year old girl starts speaking in Latin with a very deep voice, and knows your life history, it changes your perspective about how real this is. I know it sounds like a lot of superstition, but it scares the crap out of me, and I'm not messing with it.

This morning when I woke up I had two messages on my answering machine from directors at the Wellness Center. They both said the same thing. One of them was, "I don't know what you did to those kids, but their parents are raving about you." It made me cry. It has been a long time since I felt like I was making a positive impact.

Comment by M Adams on February 15, 2019 at 5:58pm

Brett, it gives me such a lift to hear about your new gig — sounds perfect! Lucky kids too, great when they can connect with an adult who also makes them laugh.  

Your comment re the spirit world app that Avi came across brought back a memory for me.  Personally I don’t think that good or bad spirits reach out through apps, so I wouldn’t be scared of such a thing, but your reaction reminded me of my mom’s reaction when I was 11 and a friend brought her ouiji board over.  We were carefully following the instructions until my mom became curious and peeked in on us — she got VERY upset about the possibility of “something bad happening” and my friend and her board suddenly needed to go home for supper ASAP.  

Comment by Brett Bowman on February 15, 2019 at 12:34pm

Avi, things like that scare the crap out of me. I mean, how do you know that you are actually communicating with your mom, and not something bad? I believe that you may open yourself to something that may attach itself to you. That's just personal opinion though. I have a friend who used a medium to contact her mom and it gave her a lot of closure. I just don't want to take that chance. I do talk to my mom. Of course she doesn't talk back. And every night I say, "I love you mom." I also tell God to tell her that I love her when I pray. I've just come to the conclusion that I will not be able to be with my mom again in this life.

I've had a good week. I changed jobs. I am a Personal Trainer at Wellness Center now. Yesterday I did a group session with children. Making them laugh and having a healthy impact in their lives made me feel like I had some purpose again. We have a lot of cancer survivors that I want to work with. I didn't feel guilty about feeling good which is a big step for me. My mom would have been happy for me.

Theresa, although I had a good day... yes, our lives have changed. Life will never be the same without our moms. You're in my prayers, my friend.

Comment by Theresa on February 15, 2019 at 5:22am

No we should not, God is the only communicator Avi, you are right.

We should not disturb the deceased, they are in peace, it is us who are not in peace.

I still struggle everyday, I just have come to recognize that this is my new life.  

Comment by Avi on February 15, 2019 at 3:08am

Hi Friends, 

Few days back I came to know an app EquoVox which can help you communicate with your loved ones who are deceased. It seems be fake to me but have seen some videos on you tube people claiming its real. Did anybody on this group tried this or should we try such things in first place. As per Hindu mythology, I should not disturb the deceased loved ones as they are in peace. 

Comment by Brett Bowman on February 9, 2019 at 8:23pm

Avi, just keep focusing on the good things in your life. You are blessed.

Comment by Avi on February 8, 2019 at 3:27am

Yes Brett. We need to make everything OK which is difficult. I need to go to office daily, spend 8 hours there, have food, wash my clothes and do everything which I am supposed to do. At the deep of my heart I don't want to do anything. 

Comment by Brett Bowman on February 5, 2019 at 3:19pm

I think it's those tricks and distractions (though necessary) that gets us in trouble. There is a stark reality to what has happened that will not be ignored. When I go to bed there are no distractions.

We need to be able to convince ourselves that everything is okay. And the best way to do that is to make everything as okay as possible. I have a long way to go to make that happen. 

Comment by Avi on February 5, 2019 at 8:34am

Similar to what Brett mentioned, yesterday's night was nightmare for me. I wake up two time in panic not sure why. 

I cried a lot for two days and cannot do anything but to accept and regret. 

 

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Nancy is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
G B is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Saturday
Dennis C. replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"Amy, I am so sorry for your loss. The journey of caregiving is extremely difficult. The loss of our especially loved dear ones is unspeakable. There are so many different ideas about what happens to us when we die. Religion teaches many different…"
Friday
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I just feel like I am in a fog.  I have a little dog that is at least ten years old.  She adored my Mom & she has really grieved for her.  I know how you feel about your dog.  I worry about her.  She is all I have. …"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too Brett, I sit here an look at my 12 year old Labrador and I know he is on borrowed time, and my heart breaks, losing him will be something that I am not looking forward to. As you said Brett, we have the live our lives until we are called…"
Thursday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Yes, I was looking at something that popped up on my Yahoo news feed. It was an article naming 106 celebrities who have passed away in 2019. So many names and faces that I remembered. Now they are gone, and they aren't coming back. Their time…"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett so true she was my security blanket I feel like I have no one to lean on that understood me like her You know what keeps coming in my mind. How true it is and scary that everything has a beginning and an end."
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I hear it all the time you don’t know how lucky you were that your mother wasn’t sick and you didn’t have to take care of her I say to them lucky I was lucky that my mother died and I was not right by her side to tell her I love…"
Wednesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M, the problem is that our security blankets were ripped away. Like you, sometimes I am glad to be sad. I feel like I am closer to my mom when I am crying. At least, her memory is fresher with me when I am in that zone. I feel like the hard reality…"
Wednesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Theresa, millions, billions of people have lost their moms. Sometimes someone will tell me that they have lost their mom, too, but they were able to deal with it, and they wonder why I haven't dealt with it as well. This may sound like an…"
Wednesday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Me too ...I was sitting marking a paper yesterday and suddenly realized that I can’t see or talk to my mother about this or anything else and the tears came.  But I’m glad to think of her, in a way I can be glad to be sad sometimes.…"
Tuesday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I sometimes will just be sitting down and I start to cry because I keep thinking I miss my mom so much my whole world is just not the same I think that I’ve become a different person it will be four years and I still cry I can’t put into…"
Tuesday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Definitely a colder world now.  I like the image of the security blanket — like, as we go forward, we will always keep it but eventually may be able to wash it, fold it nicely, and put it in some place of honour close at hand but without…"
Tuesday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The world just became a colder place when my mom died. I just remember feeling like all was right with the world when my mom was in the next room. "
Jul 16
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"It is such a traumatic event, especially when you have had a wonderful Mom.  It is so hard knowing she is gone.  Knowing this is permanent.  There is no one that can fill the void she left.  My brother was close to Mom, but he…"
Jul 16
Cherie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 15
Amy replied to Amy's discussion How do I get unstuck?
"I am not a believer and nor was he. We covered the bases just incase though. We were both raised Catholic. That is all besides the point though. "
Jul 15
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"While I never forget that my mom is gone, for some reason it just hits me over the head sometimes. Just out of the blue I'll be like, "Mom is gone." It's horrible. It's ever present. And the thing is that it is always with…"
Jul 15
Sue Toler commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"My Mom also.  I could always talk to her about anything & knew she was someone I could totally trust.  I am constantly thinking of something I want to share with her & then I remember she is gone.  I loved spending time with…"
Jul 15
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"There is no doubt that it is anxiety. In fact, I think we are experiencing fight or flight. Since birth my mom had been my security blanket."
Jul 15

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