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I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....

Members: 727
Latest Activity: yesterday

Discussion Forum

I am lost without her! (MOM) 9 Replies

Started by DeeDee. Last reply by DeeDee Jul 26.

I miss my Mom too.

Started by Anthony Jul 25.

Not only do I miss her, feel like I lost my purpose. Why go on? 7 Replies

Started by Jennifer Nuss. Last reply by Michael Thompson May 29.

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Comment by Avi yesterday

Lia, your post made me cry because I also feel similar. 

I wish you all strength 

Comment by Brett Bowman on Friday

Lia, a few lost minutes cannot compete with a lifetime of love that you shared with your mom.

Comment by Lia Lynch on Friday

Hi there.  Brett, you were (are) totally right -- I was and think I still am in shock. There was so much to do, and with my kid to take care of, I wasn't processing. At all.

Still not. I didn't get to say goodbye.  She was in a hospice, alone, when she died. She told me the day before that she was going to die soon, and I went in to work to take off, and she died the next morning before I could get there to spend the day.  I'd spoken to her clinician just four days before her death to ask how long, and he'd said "weeks to low months" but he was wrong.  No one really knew -- she'd only been diagnosed less than four weeks prior, first diagnosis and the cancer was everywhere. So no one knew how it would go, just that treatment was not really an option, even had she wanted it.  Which she did not.

Now her ashes are here and I am just constantly saying I'm sorry to them. And my poor daughter, who always had her grandma here after school, comes home and is alone until I arrive. It's not long, but still... my mom helped me raise her for the past eight years. And I am trying to hold it together for my kid, but in doing so I am just pushing things away, it makes it worse when it pops back up.

Comment by M Adams on Thursday

As Brett suggests, you sure can be griefstricken without feelings of guilt -- for me guilt doesn't seem relevant to my deep sadness about losing my mother.  It's more a combination of loneliness, shock, emptiness, disappointment (because she'd come through so much and was really improving, then suddenly collapsed), and a kind of futile anger at all the suffering she so patiently endured.  I find myself longing to look at photographs of her, but when I do I start crying and have to put them away.  I keep thinking 'I must tell Mom about this' and then remembering I can't.  

Comment by BLUEBELL on Thursday

Seems like we all have our regrets and sadness that we live with every day. But I have noticed for myself that though I still have them, they have softened over time.

Bluebell

On a different subject I want to celebrate this morning of being able to sit comfortably on my bum. Physical Therapy has changed his plan of exercise and it is working after only having 2 sessions!

Comment by Theresa on Thursday

Brett, me too, the only guilt I have is if I did not stop at her house for three minutes, I would have been there, but I was not.

I say it everyday why did I do that...

Comment by Virginia G on Thursday

Avi, what is what’s app?  I don’t have a smart phone.

Comment by Virginia G on Thursday

The pain seems to get worse everyday.  I guess the numbness is starting to wear off.  I need God to listen to me.  I can’t live like this.

Comment by BLUEBELL on Wednesday

Me too Brett

Comment by Brett Bowman on Wednesday

Even if I didn't have guilt, I would still miss my mom very badly.

 

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Latest Activity

jen brown is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
4 hours ago
bluebird replied to bluebird's discussion My husband died, and I will never want to live without him.
"Joe, Thank you for your response, and for providing the link to your post about your NDE as well as describing it in more detail here. Although it's terrible that you were in that accident, in a way it was a blessing for you, in that it allows…"
14 hours ago
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia, your post made me cry because I also feel similar.  I wish you all strength "
yesterday
Bern commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"2012 September 30th. This fight is real. My only son was shot in the head. The girl and her brother were in the house when it happened. The told police that they were playing with the gun. Well a sister and brother will die and go to hell or heaven…"
Saturday
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Judy sometimes I feel the same way...why do some who don't deserve to live get to while our kids didn't.  And sometimes when I hear others use that word, "miracle" it upsets me too."
Saturday
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Connie forgive me if I screw this up but the line, "Don't cry for me, cause I live in eternity" runs through me head all the time."
Saturday
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Connie what a beautiful gift!!!!! That was Daniel, letting you know he's there. "
Saturday
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"Ginger I left all my sons pictures right where they were I need to see them. "
Saturday
Teresa D. commented on Kar's group Missing my Son or Daughter
"It's been a while since I've checked in.  I'm actually melting down right now. Don't know what brought it on but can't seem to stop.  I miss everyone and think of all of you all the time.  Michael's…"
Saturday
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Lia, a few lost minutes cannot compete with a lifetime of love that you shared with your mom."
Friday
Lia Lynch commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi there.  Brett, you were (are) totally right -- I was and think I still am in shock. There was so much to do, and with my kid to take care of, I wasn't processing. At all. Still not. I didn't get to say goodbye.  She was in a…"
Friday
M Adams commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"As Brett suggests, you sure can be griefstricken without feelings of guilt -- for me guilt doesn't seem relevant to my deep sadness about losing my mother.  It's more a combination of loneliness, shock, emptiness, disappointment…"
Thursday
David is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Seems like we all have our regrets and sadness that we live with every day. But I have noticed for myself that though I still have them, they have softened over time. Bluebell On a different subject I want to celebrate this morning of being able to…"
Thursday
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Brett, me too, the only guilt I have is if I did not stop at her house for three minutes, I would have been there, but I was not. I say it everyday why did I do that..."
Thursday
Virginia G posted a blog post

No reason to live

No happiness.  Nothing to look forward to.  Constant pain.  Memories everywhere and longing to be able to make more or even talk about them.  Scared, needing answers, anxious, lost, angry, devastated, guilt ridden.   how could life be so cruel?  It’s just not possible.See More
Thursday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, what is what’s app?  I don’t have a smart phone."
Thursday
Virginia G commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"The pain seems to get worse everyday.  I guess the numbness is starting to wear off.  I need God to listen to me.  I can’t live like this."
Thursday
M Adams posted a blog post

In black and white

Today I had to respond to several emails and repeatedly write down that my mother is dead. Finding it very hard to keep writing the words, so hard that it took several days of tearful effort to complete the three most pressing responses.  Finally got them done.  I just miss my mother so much.  I hate picking up the phone now because some part of me still expects her voice at the other end of the line. I feel wounded by family and friends who are grieving so differently from me, who are keen to…See More
Wednesday
M Adams left a comment for Daniella
"On the surface our situations could hardly be more different -- my mother just died, she was 84 years old and had numerous health problems the last five years -- but reading your words touched me, somehow I felt like they were my own, the…"
Wednesday

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