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Comment by Pennywyze on January 30, 2021 at 6:03pm

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I'm still trying to figure out how & when I can grieve the 5 people I lost, individually. I could've been able to grieve those members of my family at different times of their deaths were spread out over time. But the 5 people I lost were gone between February of 2019 and April 2020 so, there's my conundrum. 

Comment by Pennywyze on January 26, 2021 at 4:43am

Been missing my dad a lot lately. He might have been a jerk most of my childhood, but he began treating me like an adult when I became one. That caused me to respect him more, and I respected him as though he was God. Not because he made me, but because mom was a stickler for my showing dad respect. Including lying to him and talking bad to him.

Love you dad

Comment by dream moon JO B on January 24, 2021 at 3:07pm

yep so tru diana u soon lern by frinds or u thrtt thy wz frinds wen we loss a lovd 

we do iv bean on hearr blogdd ovr yrs 

on hear sinsee 2012 

hit botll few tims hopin it wz anserr but i no itss nott not

all i no is i do it my speed on grieff i do no 1 eslsses say so

iv had sillllly comntds i hav u shud be happy yore dads dead why say stuff lk ths fw of my frindss hav had simlr comtss lk me

wen i loss my cat lucy evn  got why  u cryin ovr cat 

coz i lovd her she wz my kid my fur kid dorter she wz

Comment by Diana, Grief Recovery Coach on January 24, 2021 at 2:57pm

@pennywyze, don't you just love people who tell us how we are suppose to grieve and how we are suppose to feel.  I also have a so called friend that tells me how I am suppose to feel about everything.  I am trying gracefully to get her out of my life.  I'm allowed my feelings and emotions - they are real.  Everyone is grieving the way they grieve.  You can't tell a person how to grieve, yet, people do.  Enough out of me.  Wishing everyone a good week to come.  

Comment by Pennywyze on January 23, 2021 at 5:08pm

I hope everyone had a great day, today. I, on the other hand, had better than a great day. This is, in spite of my best friend of 30 years deciding to be judgemental and tell me how I'm supposed to be grieving. She's almost 15 years into her grief, and she knows it all. 

Comment by Pennywyze on January 23, 2021 at 6:30am

Get ready, those who love country music and George Strait. He's sick enough that he's cancelled a show, his wife has been trying for a week to get his fever down. Not COVID-19. A rare disease that is directly related to pneumonia. I don't like saying this but, a couple of hours ago, I heard his song "Troubadour". Reminded me that dad liked "Amarillo By Morning" so, I put the song on YouTube on my phone. When the song was over I said, "Everybody needs to get all of his memorabilia they can because when he's gone the prices are going through the roof. He's not going to pass in the next 5 years, more like the next couple of months". I had no idea where it came from, and still don't. I asked Google if he's sick and the first 2 articles I read were about the very rare disease related to pneumonia. 

Comment by Pennywyze on January 22, 2021 at 7:58pm

 How is everyone, today? I've had better days, and I've had worse. Today was a very good day.

Comment by Pennywyze on January 16, 2021 at 1:18pm

The relationship with my father was more than strained, for many years. I came from a dysfunctional family that is over 5 miles long. I hated my father for years. I don't want to get into the specifics as to why. Let's just say, "The stress of seeing my mom beaten on on a regular basis, caused me to have dark circles under my eyes before I reached puberty". Although I was never beat on by dad, I still had a resentment towards my father that branched further than anger. 

However, I found out in 2007 (I think) that dad's heart was in pretty bad shape, and his doctor was talking about putting a stent in it. I didn't see my father for a couple years after I heard about his heart. The man was running away from something so, it was never a necessity for me to know his every move. At this point in my life, it was a great relief for dad to leave the city of Houston or the entire state of Texas. 

February 7, will be 2 years since he passed, and due to my husband passing 2 months and 2 days after dad, the grief of dad is just now catching up with me.

RIP: Royce Allen (Al) Watson

You are dearly missed

 

Comment by dream moon JO B on November 4, 2020 at 10:40am

sorrrry on yore losss hterss no rightt or wongg way 2 greiff justt try not to let othrss tell u how u shud feal 

im spirttid 2 

Comment by dream moon JO B on October 10, 2020 at 2:21pm

so sorry on yor loss alxandr & mandyy 

i no it min its so tuff 2 get hlp u need coz of wold cov19 byt but hear u can blog get yor fealins on hw u feal

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