I have been struggling completely alone for nearly 2 years. I felt like there HAD to be others in my position out there but I had no way to find out.  I finally found a shrink who told me the term disenfranchised grief.  And told me about this site.  I feel hope for the first time in nearly 2 years.  I have been so completely and utterly alone and have had NO way to work through my grief other than bottling it up.

We are/were both married to other people, literally no one knew/knows.  It's been nearly 2 years and I'm as devastated as day one.  I've attempted suicide twice in this time.  I just....I can't see a way to live without him.  I feel like my soul, spirit and life have left me with him and I have no will to go on.  I miss him so much every day.  Every.  Single.  Day.