I don't understand why people keep telling me that things are going to get easier when people ask me how I am like a friend of mine that I've been friends with for over 30 years she lost her husband 10 years ago and she tells me that things are going to get easier and I tell her no things are harder and harder and harder every day the sadness is overwhelming how in the world is anything going to get easier and she says it will with time maybe for her but not for me not ever

Views: 238

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

yep i no

i no u dnt get ovr it it will hrut for evr i no all i no u hav 2 liv wif it wish i no so hrd 

someone said to me once that you never get used to it and this is just the new normal. I hate that saying it sounds so complete and over but I can't seem to get it out of my head

Pamela, sounds like you are not coping very well. It's hard to do. Have you seen a therapist, or counselor? It feels like such a lot of work, but overall I think you could possibly find a way to cope.

I know...that doesn't sound like much of a life..  coping.  Sounds like something I wouldn't want. But I think that is where "it gets easier in time" comes from. You learn to cope with what was pushed onto you. Every time I do something around the house that I've never done before because Rocky always did all that, I'm pretty proud of myself and my ability to cope with that thing improves. I'm not so scared as I was before.

I'm no expert, you just sound so overwhelmed. And you are! People here know what you are going through though, so keep posting and reading.

Kathy Akin

No I'm not coping very well it's been since September of 2015 my mom passed September 6th and my husband September 14th so it's been a Little over a year and coping has gotten more real and a lot harder because the numbness has worn off and now the reality sets in so for me things getting easier is never going to happen but thank you for your kind words anyway I do appreciate it

Hi pamela my mom passed oct30/2016 and my boyfriend 5 days later nov4/2016 maybe we could help each other ive been trying to find someone in my same position wishing you lots of love and strength msg me if you want to chat sometime

sisne 2012 multi loss 2013 loss 2014 loss 2-15 loss 2016 loss loss my fur kid wish wz grt frind ovr 16 yrs of frndshp i had pepe say she wz only a cat yea but my cat it dnt tell me way is huf feal wen my dad died thn loss so mush loss in 2012 thn 2013 2014 2015 2016 thn lst wk my fur kid lst tue i spt al nite sobin ovr her i s did sad 2 say only 1 it unstood my loss wz my cat she did nevr tld me 2 get f@@@k ovr it lk iv had off pepel 1s its nt had a loss 1s its not had loss seam 2 tell us way we feal thy do

RSS

Groups

Latest Activity

Profile IconKayla and Jazi joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Billy Jo Colt commented on Kelli Auerbach's blog post New York Times essay I wrote about orphanhood
"Thank you Kelly for a genuine and bright yet deep insight into how berievement has affected you. Children are resourcefull and it isn't till in later life that the death of a loved one creates a new reality. I've written a song about the…"
Friday
Kelli Auerbach posted a blog post

New York Times essay I wrote about orphanhood

Hi everyone, I am new to the group, but not to loss. Thanks for adding me.I wanted to share an essay I wrote, "Welcome to the Freak Show: Becoming an Orphan in My 20s", that is in the New York Times today. Even though all of our experiences with grief are unique, I hope it resonates in some way.Best, KelliSee More
Friday
Profile IconKelli Auerbach, Fedor Malkin and Jan McCracken joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Friday
Coartney Hale updated their profile
Thursday
Coartney Hale posted photos
Thursday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Everyone sounds a little down today.   And that's OK.   I do the same thing.   I am learning how to move on with life.  I know that there will never be another Joe.  He was my life, my love.  I miss…"
Thursday
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Over the last couple of days, I've had some real negative thoughts, scary to say the least.  I know I'll never see her here with me again, which I know but can't accept, but today I questioned is she here with me in spirit? …"
May 15
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Marita, not that I am glad to  hear you suffer from anxiety and fear but thank you for at least sharing that you too are overwhelmed with living.  At times I want to scream that the way I feel is not some cry for sympathy but more I am…"
May 15
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Bluebird, You were the original poster who made it real for me that telling the truth about our pain was ok.  That it was how this grief was going to be no mater how I might be told otherwise.  And to know that your truth is that pretty…"
May 15
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, yes, I too have the recurring thoughts my brain sends me that my husband is dead.  It's not possible for me to accept it either.  I know it as fact just as I know the sun shines, but when it appears in my brain I simply cannot…"
May 15
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"As much as we all suffer, some may have an additional burden of having to go out into the real world and deal with people in business to survive.  The impact of that makes it all that much more unbearable.  While I'm not in that…"
May 15
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Nobody really understands except for the members on this website. It was a life saver for me. Thanks to all of you who share your posts and the support we give each other."
May 15
Joe Kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, yes.  Linda, yes.  Marita, yes.  Bulebird, Yes.  I'm becoming paralyzed to the point of petrification.  NOTHING MATTERS except what we all know what it is.  We can't go back and we can't accept…"
May 15
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Same here, Marita. Things I would have been able to deal with before (either before I met my husband, or while he was here with me), I cannot handle at all now. Any tiny problem is insurmountable. Everything is. Morgan, I am truly sorry you are…"
May 15
Marita commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, i live with constant fear and anxiety. Every time I am confronted with a new problem I break down because my husband is not here to support me, to comfort me, to love me and it is a reminder of my loss.  When things become so…"
May 15
Rosaisela is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
May 15
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, My whole problem with myself is I just can't accept my Husband's death and there is a not a thing I can do about it. I want things back the way things were. So to avoid all my breakdowns I try to numb myself with beer. I don't…"
May 15
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Avi, I felt something very similar. After a year the pain and shock of mom's death had eased somewhat, but the guilt increased. I learned that grief is a process that has many different facets. I am really amazed by the folks who seem to…"
May 14
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Terrible,horrible, crippling breakdown tonight.  I know what triggered it and it is something I have struggled with all these years and the closer I get to trying to solve it the worse the breakdowns are becoming. Problem is I am still unable…"
May 14

© 2019   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service