Just visited my psychiatrist yesterday was told there is no pill for grieving and pining for my Husband, she has tried all types of anti-depressants and after four years none have helped my pain. So I guess I will just have to live with this everyday until I die, Which I hope is very soon.

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First I must tell you I'm sorry for the loss you feel every day September last year I lost my mom and my husband within a week of each other and I am still so lost The reason I'm still here is because of my grandchildren and the promise I made to my husband I promised him I wouldn't follow him into the dark as much as I would love to I made a promise I must keep I haven't seen anybody as far as psychiatrist go my only outlet is this website I have no one to talk to my family believes I'm fine and then I guess I just have to get over everything just MoveOn they have no clue how hard that is I'm so sorry that you're hurting so badly I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better just know that there are people on this website that you could vent to anytime you need to and you won't be made to feel like your feelings don't matter one of the best things I did was to come upon this website so whenever I'm feeling lost this helps so I guess what I want to tell you is that I'm here if you need someone to talk to you can write it down and I'll respond I hope you have a good day today

Hi Pamela,

Thanks for replying, my family really doesn't know how much I hurt, they think I am just fine, I can't even discuss my feelings with them as they are uncomfortable with it. I have tried God but no answer from him either. I just wish I would hurry up and did.

I'm right there with you, Linda, as far as how you feel.

I haven't even tried taking an anti-depressant.  There would be no point to that for me, since the reason for my depression (my husband's death) is not going to change, and it is a completely valid reason to be severely depressed.  The medications for depression and panic attacks are often the same, and in the past I have taken (at different times) both Zoloft and Prozac, which I did find helped with panic attacks, but there's simply no point in me trying them now for depression.

Thanks for your reply Bluebird, next visit I am going to ask her to stop all the pills I am taking as  she stated there is not a pill for grief.  

My doctor said the same thing about pills and grief. I am at my wit's end. Nobody wants to hear this stuff so I am on here. If im posting too much, i apologize. But only you folks understand.

That's about it.

I agree with Anne. Don't worry about posting here "too much"; there's no such thing. Post as much as you want or need to.



I would never tell you to F off, we are all in the same boat, i have been going to see my Psychiatrist and therapist now for 4 years, they are the only ones I can talk to, my family thinks I am just feeling sorry for myself, it hurt me deeply. I just miss my Husband so bad, the heartache won't go away. 

Dear Linda,

I have thought about your post all weekend to try to figure out how to tell you how much I want to lift some of your pain off your heart and help you bare the load. Sure enough, there is no pill or words that will make the pain instantly disappear. I agree that there is no hope for a pill that will magically relieve the pain. In the Bible, death is described as “the last enemy.” (1 Corinthians 15:26) It breaks into our lives with irresistible force, and robs us of our loved one. The way you feel is natural and the pain unbearable.

There is no shortage of advice on this subject. Not all of it, however, is helpful. For instance, you may find that some will advise you not to cry or show your feelings in any way. Others may push you to do the opposite and expose all your feelings. There is a more balanced view, one that is supported by modern research. Mental-health experts acknowledge that tearfulness is a normal part of grieving. And grieving may, in time, help you to move on despite the enormity of your loss. Suppressing grief, however, may do more harm than good. Think of Jesus, for example. At the death of his dear friend Lazarus, Jesus openly wept, even though he had the power to bring the dead back to life!—John 11:33-35

Some bereavement counselors advise those who are struggling with grief to get involved in helping others or to volunteer their time in some community service. Doing so can bring joy and may ease a person’s grief. Still never forget that you must grieve in your own way and in your own time. I will keep you in my prayers and will listen to you anytime you want to talk.

I have sent you a private message with my phone number. Call anytime...


Thank you so much for your thoughts, many things you have told me have been discussed with my therapist  such as helping others or volunteer, these things do nothing for me. I want to live again a full life my husband and I had together, it was 24/7 everyday, and we always enjoyed each one, but this will never happen again in my life. I am just waiting to die to join him.

My family always told me we are too close but that was better than being far apart like most of their marriages are or were.



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