I lost my father in law who I lived with and took care of so I was really close to him on april 28th 2021 and 1 week later on may 5th 2021 I lost my mother. My mother had made the choice to go comfort care. After she saw my dad and I that morning she changed her mind. About 3 hours later the hospital called my mom wanted to go to comfort care. I drove the 45 minutes to be with her. Here agitation was so bad they have her ativan. She was still coherent and knew what she wanted. But could not sign. First thing I did when is got there was make sure she was coherent. She said she wasn't sure what to do. I had her talk to me about it. Her worry was who would take care of my dad. It that point I reassured her and she wanted to go to comfort care but due to the ativan and prior stroke she was unable to sign this time so I signed. Some days I have my doubts and question my reactions while I sat with her while she died
I am sorry you are going through something similar it is devastating and had to work through. I am doing okay. Its been 5 months I still have really hard days. I still have trouble with something but getting my moms medical records and reviewing them has really helped. I think some of what makes it hard its my father in law was 85 but my mom was 69 so its coming to terms with the loss so young of my mom.