I have been feeling very lonely and very depressed lately.  Old friends are busy with their lives.  Even my children are busy.   My daughter lives 45 minutes away.   She is busy with her new house.  My son is 10 minutes away.  He calls and invites me to go places with them.  I miss the friends that Joe and I had together.  They seem to be busy when I call them., so I quit calling.   My sister in law is very good about calling me.   She comes once a month with her husband to stay overnight.  I'm thankful for that.  It's hard for me because I don't drive, and cannot get out of the house when I want to.  I'm thankful for this sight, because I need to talk.

Views: 157

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

I'm sorry you're feeling so down.  It's good that you have your children and your sister-in-law, but no one can take the place of your husband.  As far as your friends, it's quite possible that they just don't know what to do. People don't know how to deal with death, and it makes them think about their own mortality and that of their loved ones. I don't know your friends, so I don't know if that's what's happening, but it is what often happens. Maybe you could write letters to a couple of your closest friends, telling them that you miss them, and that you know Joe's death was hard on them too, and that they might not know what to say to you, but that they are important to you and that you want to maintain the friendships.  

Thank you bluebird for the kind words.  That's a great idea to write to our friends.   I still send Christmas cards, and birthday cards, but I should send a card once in awhile too. Thank you for the advice.

I'm glad I was able to help a bit.  :)

I know how you feel  I too can not drive so I'm always home ALONE most of the day.  Everyone says if you need me call, but when I do they always have something going on, so I hate to impose.  I just keep to myself most of the time.  

I too, have been feeling extremely lonely for the last year. I thank God for my female Black Labrador Retriever, who my Mom loved SO much! She's all I have! And all I want! :-)

Yet, I feel we BOTH would benefit from being around people more. We have one aunt still living here. All siblings live out of town. And I went through a breakup 2 years ago that is still not finalized. And it seems more and more people have been distancing themselves from me and not responding to my texts and calls. I do NOT sit there and talk about all my grief and depression! I just need someone to be there for me and comfort me. My dog does it for me always! I am so tired of us being alone and having to do EVERYTHING myself! It is wearing me out mentally, physically and emotionally.

ANY thoughts are welcome! :-)

It must be hard not being able to drive.  When I’m not sleeping because of the depression, I feel the need to get out of the house.  But then when I’m out I’m alone anyway and see other people with their families and that is sad.  People are getting tired of me stopping over.  I do sit there and talk about my grief if I do talk.  That’s the only thing on my mind.  And now my Dad has cancer and I can’t take care of him.  I can’t do everything, I have trouble doing anything with the grief, depression, and anxiety.  It’s a living hell without the person you love most.

RSS

Groups

Latest Activity

Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, Thank you for your post. I like Morgan gave me a lift. I have often thought about suicide but have no intention of doing away with myself because of my religion. I will not take the chance of never seeing Julian again I too do not go to the…"
1 hour ago
Aimee Hall Fuszard joined Karen's group
Thumbnail

I miss my Mom!

If you have that hole in your heart that you get when you lose the woman that you shared a body with....
8 hours ago
Aimee Hall Fuszard updated their profile photo
9 hours ago
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you Joe for your posts. In a weird way it gives me a lift.  How?  Because I know that I am not making up how hard this suffering is.   My closest friend and sibling also know how I feel about dying and I know I would not have to…"
10 hours ago
Monty commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"joe that is incredible. thanks for the time and energy sharing. i think ill look at some of your suggestions and see what will work for me. for me this week has been hard. 1 week until first anniversary of her death, i don't know what to…"
11 hours ago
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Read second post first Morgan. Had to break it up into two parts and did it backwards."
13 hours ago
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
""As the years are passing I feel the need more and more." When I read some of you guys suffering so long, it gives me great fear that despite my health neglect, and legal preparations, I don't know when it will actually come to…"
13 hours ago
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, "I read your words and it brings me to my knees."  I keep asking God to let me go many times a day.  I tell Him/Her/It that I will never relent until my prayer is answered.  I ask my love to keep asking too and have…"
13 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thanks Bluebird for nice comment about my Julian. He was so caring and was my rock. Being with him for 24/7 for 13 years of our retirement was bliss, I thank God for this time together.  Morgan & Joe I keep believing there is eternal love…"
17 hours ago
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Joe, I read your words and it brings me to my knees.  I so want to join my husband.  As the years are passing I feel the need more and more.  I am not sure I understand totally how your OBE has given you more faith that somehow we…"
18 hours ago
Brett Bowman commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Pamela, you are grieving for your mother. You may not be able to see it but I can. My father was horrible. I did not grieve his death. I barely gave it a second thought. You are grieving your mom, and you are grieving the way things were. The advice…"
18 hours ago
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Linda, Your Julian looks like such a nice man in that photo; what a lovely smile! Joe, Thank you so much for your kind words. I hope you are right."
21 hours ago
Pamela philipp commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"I lost my mother on 9-6-15 eight days before I lost my husband on 9-14-15 and I feel horrible because I am struggling with how I am grieving for my mother because we had a very strained relationship because my mother was an alcoholic all her life…"
21 hours ago
joe kelly commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Dear Bluebird, It is impossible for us to know for absolutely sure what exactly happens when we die.  Oh, how I would love her to appear before me and tell me she's here and waiting for me, but I also know that she can't do that…"
23 hours ago
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Hi Bluebird, I am so glad that the folks on this forum feel the same way I do. Society is always trying to label people, if we don't agree with them they think we are weird or crazy. My sweet Husband Julian taught me to ignore what other people…"
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Sorry, I meant Linda and Monty and Joe."
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I fully agree with you both, Linda and Monty. My deep and abiding grief is the only response I could possibly have to my husband's death. My soulmate was torn from me, and I don't know if his wonderful soul still exists, or if I will ever…"
yesterday
Daylight commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Avi, it would be nice to have a friend. The time gap is big but we can agree on a time to talk. Keeping busy also functions for me. Anyways, as soon as I have free time the thoughts and feelings came back and grief hits so hard. I wish you have a…"
yesterday
Daylight commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"M Adams , I hope this feeling of desolation lessens in time. It is an extremely hard process. Unbearable at times. I hope you are doing well."
yesterday
Avi commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Hi Daylight India is 8.30 hours ahead of Argentina. We can talk at your early morning whenever you want.  Feeling of desolation still exists for me but I try to be strong and do things (work, travel, eating etc) with sincerity. "
yesterday

© 2018   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service