I called my Annette's cell ang got her voicemail.

Devestating doesn't come close to what I felt. It was a voice from the past. Hearing her "I can't come to the phone right so please leave a message"

She sounded so alive. And my misery has left me unable to speak, and barely stand.

I am lost without her.

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I really can't be of much help. I've dug myself back into my own hole again and as long as I've been alive since my husband's death, I can only try to manage the days even hours at a time. And I don't have nearly the health problems that you do. I'm so sorry it's been so miserable for you. I wish it was any other way, because this is been a Marathon of grief for me and unfortunately for many of us it just doesn't seem to stop. Again, just writing because I want to say I'm so sorry. Sorry that the loves of our lives are somewhere we can't attach to them. It's just awful.

Hi Morgan,

My grief will never end until I am dead 

I do appreciate your words. it's just so odd to here the voice of someone you love deeply and who is no longer with me. I don't know what to do except lay in bed in misery. I had to take off of work I just couldn't go in. Each day I get weaker. I'm laying down as I type this. God please end this suffering. I just want my wife back.
Wow, I have a hard time reading old emails & texts. That must be hard.

Hi Richard,

I lost my Husband 4 years ago, but I keep his voicemail message because that's all I have left of him.


It's strange how we respond to bereavement -- I wanted to preserve the last telephone message my husband left on our machine, and had talked to a friend about how best to transfer it to something permanent, but then a power outage occurred and I discovered that outage wiped out all the messages. So now I have no way to hear him speak, except perhaps in a dream. It was painful to listen to the message but at the same time I treasured it. He had a beautiful voice. I guess we keep feeling loss in new ways. I do still have some newspapers that he had filled out the crosssword in because I like to see his printing in the grids, even though seeing them makes me tear up.

I have kept a voicemail message from my husband, too. I never actually noticed it on my phone until sometime after he died, so I don't know when he left it and I don't recall him ever asking if I got his voicemail.  Anyway, I treasure it, and I have saved it on my phone, on my computer, and on an external hard-drive.  Among other things, in the voicemail he tells me how much he loves me, and so I will always keep that voicemail.  Yes, it's hard to listen to, but I will always want to hear his voice.  


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