So tomorrow is Easter and it will be the first holiday without my mom. I really do not know how I am going to handle it if it were not for my four girls I would probably just try and sleep the whole day since Im not sleeping at night time anyway. I honestly feel like I am losing my mind I find myself wanting to end my own life and then realizing what I am doing or thinking and I just start to cry and ask myself wth is wrong with me. I always knew this would be hard I just never thought it would be this hard and instead of the days getting easier it seems like they get harder and harder. I pray for comfort and healing all the time and I know somehow this has to get easier but my heart hurts so much that I am completely a loss person right now can anyone help to cope or understand these feelings.

Thanks Erica

Views: 131

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Erica, I understand your feelings - this holiday has been harder for me, without Hollister, than I thought it would be. My mind went to what we would have been doing if he were here. I've tried to keep in mind what Easter means - the promise it holds for where my love is now - and find I'm not comforted. Honestly, I'd have to say I'm feeling sorry for myself because I can't have him in my life. I know he's in a much better place.

Still, I'm not facing the same issues as you are and I'm concerned about you. You sound fragile, emotionally, and I wonder if it's time to talk to a professional to see what kind of help you can get. No, I'm not saying you're nuts or abnormal - I'm sure that's not the case. You're seeking help here, so I'd say you're not 'off your rocker.' From what you've described, I wonder if it's time to try an antidepressant to help you cope. A professional could answer that question. 

Remember that your children feel the same way about you as you do about your mother. Reach out for some help so you can be the mother they need right now. My prayers are with you.

Kathy my mind did the same thing I just kept wondering what my mom would be doing I even back home and to visit her for the first time since the funeral which was very hard I still feel like im in denial. By the end of the night I was a big mess and I honestly think I was on the verge of having a nervous breakdown it got pretty scary for me my kids and husband and with all that happening I did take the next step and call and made an appt with a therapist which that made a big difference these last 3 days. I go back to see the therapist on Tuesday and Ive been praying that things will get a little easier I even started writing in a Journal which also seems to be helping. Well I just wanted to say thank you for your prayers 

RSS

Latest Activity

Alice Thompson left a comment for nat
"Dear Nat, I’m so very sorry you had to lose your beloved husband. I wish you strength and comfort as you make your way through these early days and nights. There are many kind souls on this site who know about deep pain, and I recommend…"
20 minutes ago
Profile IconKar-Kate Leung, nat, Ambreen and 5 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
2 hours ago
Theresa commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Bluebell, my thoughts and prayers are with you. My brother called me the other day and he said are you ok? There is a twenty year age difference between us, so we are not that close and he lives five hours away. I said to him, yes I though you would…"
5 hours ago
BLUEBELL commented on Karen's group I miss my Mom!
"Another bad day. I was shopping for Christmas cards and gift bags when without warning, I broke down in tears at the register. Thank goodness the cashier was a sensitive caring person and did not just blow me off. She said "Your Mom will always…"
6 hours ago
Stephanie Coyle joined Courtney Adams's group
Thumbnail

Suicide....Hard Knowing They did it By Their Choice

This is for some of us who have lost someone due to suicide...I miss you Annie!!!See More
15 hours ago
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Linda and Morgan. It just hurts so much for all of us."
yesterday
bluebird commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"((((((morgan))))))"
yesterday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Paul, Each of us have memories of a time and day of the death of our beloved.  Mine just happened to come at a time of the year when normally the excesses of celebrating kick into high gear.  Not better not worse than anyone else's…"
yesterday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"My friend just lost her husband before Thanksgiving.   I'm trying to reach out to her, because I know how she feels, but she does not seem to want to respond.  She's keeping very busy!  I feel bad for her, but I guess…"
yesterday
Elynn m commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Thank you, Linda for posting that.   "
yesterday
Peggy left a comment for Dawn W
"Hi Dawn, I saw your posts and wanted to introduce myself.  I'm also in Canada, in Ontario.  I lost my husband suddenly in 2015.  He had cancer but had been given 3 to 5 years and was gone in 8 weeks.  If you'd like to…"
yesterday
kim posted a status
"my beautiful son, its x mas again, ill be with you soon I promise, I love you forever mom"
yesterday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Alice, I am so sorry, I know you holidays will never be the same again, we just make the best of it. "
yesterday
Alice Thompson commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"I feel the same. My love had a comprehensive stroke on 22 December, and died in hospital at 10pm on New Years Eve. Then I went “home” in a taxi amid fireworks."
Thursday
Profile IconAnn Appa, Alison Eley, Hannah and 3 more joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Thursday
Linda Engberg commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan & Paul, I feel exactly like you do, I wish I could sleep the holidays away, I find no joy in them, it's just another day I am being tortured."
Thursday
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Morgan, As hard as it is for the rest of us to endure the upcoming holidays it must be at least doubly difficult for you given the circumstances your husband and you were dealt with.  To everyone here who has put up with this hell for multiple…"
Thursday
Maxey is now friends with Cheyenne Steffen and Pamela philipp
Thursday
morgan commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Paul,  In particular this time of the year everyone who hasn't lost their love is celebrating.  I used to be one of them. Then one day a long time ago, I took my sick husband to the hospital Xmas Eve day and found out the day after…"
Thursday
Paul commented on Jon-Paul Ackerman's group Lost My Spouse...
"Count me among those who are looking forward to death after losing my wife. I am absolutely not interested in anything else."
Thursday

© 2017   Created by Jarvis.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service