Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
I never know who I can talk to at school about my brothers death... None of my friends understand; thankfully so, because I would never want them to! I feel alone though because they don't know what to say to make things better.
My brother died ten years ago when I was seven and him four. I want to talk again about his death but it's to hard to talk with my friends because, again, they don't understand. I just want to talk but I don't know who to go to!
I can relate to what you've written. Although I'm an 'old fart' now, I lost my grandmother while I was in college. All the people I'd been around, my good friends, had nothing to give me. I didn't press them for anything.
Even now, I don't have a lot to give you. I still haven't experienced the loss of a sibling. Other losses seem to be piling up - that's not one of them. Unfortunately. life and loss seem to go hand-in-hand. Sometimes we face those losses without others who have traveled the same path.
All I can tell you is to seek your own answers. Look for grief counseling, listen to your heart as you meet people, and listen to your own wisdom. Even with a counselor, you know if you'll 'click' with that person. And a friend can be just as healing as a professional. My guess is that someone is there for you - maybe not where you expect them to be. Tune in to your heart and try a new path.
I'm hoping you find what you need.
I tried talking to a counselor at school, but we stopped meeting after the second session. I don't really know why either. I thought it was going well... Maybe other kids need it more than I.
I talk sometimes with my friend. She lost three grandparents recently so I try to help her the best I can. For me, it's always nice and helps me to help others. I like to write; it helps me a lot.
I don't know... I guess sometimes I just wish, instead of me doing the helping, I could be the one getting help. Maybe that's selfish. Yeah it's sounds pretty selfish, but mayb just mayb it's okay to b a little selfish.
I get where you are coming from! My little sister died this past July. To this day, I still haven't found that right person to talk to. I journal -alot-, try to attend church more (not just because she died, but because it helps me to not feel so judged if that makes sense....) and sometimes I still get overly emotional about the whole thing. If you need anyone to talk to, you can message me. I can't say I'd have all of your anwsers, but sometimes you just need someone that understands. :)
I journal a lot as well... It brings me a lot of comfort... My diary (yes I still call it my diary ;) embracing my inner 10 year old) is like this secret keeper; it holds all the thoughts that I don't dare say outloud. I go to church a lot too; I teach religion. Well it's over now but it has helped me... I lost faith or well became out of touch with it for years, because my parents did and I just never went back. That was until I got a strange calling to do so again. If you would like to talk, please feel free to message me. We can help each other :)
My parents didn't become dysfunctional; my mom did tell me that her coping technique, all these years, has been to not talk about his death. I guess that's where I got it from; the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. My Dad doesn't talk about his deathh either; no one in my family does. I don't know why, well I do, it's to painful.
When I was younger, I went to counselling and a breevement camp. It helped a lot; I stopped though. At the time, it seemed like the right thing to do; it probably was. I didn't need it anymore. I was young and I didn't understand my emotions at the time (if that makes sense). Plus his memory was still fresh; now, I'm lucky if I remember him at all. I remember the bad, not so much the good but I'lll take what I can get.
It's so weird, these feeling have laid dorment for so long... It was really my college essay that brought them to the surface... The questions and the false life I could have had... I don't know; I think I'm rambling now... Thank you for your advice, I will talk on here because it's a safe place.
The main thing I remember about my brother is his smile... In fact, in my college essay, I pointed that out. No matter the situation; sick, in pain, happy, sad, etc, he was happy and smiling. Ohhh and another thing, he loved his video games... One game really and it always creeped me out! He was always playing it; everytime I'd walk into the room it would be on!!
My brothers name was Steven... He liked hugs and kisses... From me mainly he liked hugs not soo much kisses...
Went to the cementry and cried the other week. Haven't cried in a while... Not sure that's a good thing or a bad thing. Learned young to bottle up my feelings and all; guess that's why I'm here and stuff. I don't know.